


Heresy

by khaleesimaka



Series: Soul Eater Fandom Events [1]
Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Alternate Universe - Steampunk, F/M, Resonance Bang 2014, Suicidal Thoughts, dealing with depression and dark thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-27
Updated: 2014-12-27
Packaged: 2018-03-03 18:42:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 85,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2862905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/khaleesimaka/pseuds/khaleesimaka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steampunk AU. Soul is surprised when he hears from Maka for the first time in six years. Things have changed since they parted ways. The sinister voices in his head remind him of what he is capable of, and if he can't control the monster inside, he might hurt the woman he loves. While Soul deals with his inner tumroil, Maka tries to figure out why their friends have topped talking to him, and what dark secret Soul is keeping from her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When Two Minds Form

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that the last two chapters are very rough because I ran out of time to edit them properly for personal reasons. I do plan to go back over them in the next few days, though. So read slow.

Maka sat at her workbench, twirling a metal wrench between her fingers, and watched as the light shining in through her small window would hit one of the edges occasionally. Every single time it occurred, the tiny gleam blinded her for a fraction of a second, but she didn't pay any mind to it. She was bored out of her mind. There was absolutely nothing for her to do since she had finished her tasks for the next two weeks already, fixing every single robot the citizens of Death City had sent in to her little home business. The engine parts had been replaced and new hard drives had been installed making the copper machines practically brand new once she was finished with them.

The only thing on her agenda was to wait for a response from the training academy she had applied to months ago. They had already began to send out acceptance letters because two of her friends had received theirs. Every day she checked the mail, but there was still nothing. She found that the waiting was always the worst part. Academies like Shibusen always saved the ones that weren't accepted for the very last, allowing the anticipation and hope to grow so high that when it came time for the dreaded rejection letter, everything was torn to shreds.

But they  _had_ to admit her; there was never a doubt in her mind that they wouldn't.

Her own mother had graduated at the top of her class when she was Maka's age, even with a partner who was completely useless and lousy like her father. The older woman had also gone on to be the best Aerodynamics Pilot after joining Shibusen own division called Spartoi. It was an agency dedicated to keeping Death City and the surrounding area safe by patrolling the skies and fighting only when necessary. However, her time with Spartoi had been cut short after four years when she became pregnant with Maka.

Flying was in Maka's blood; Aerodynamics was all she heard about growing up.

They just  _had_ to admit her. There were no other options for her.

A small knock reverberated off the door, causing Maka to drop the wrench in her hand with a loud 'clang' on the table. "Maka, sweetheart," came Spirit's small voice when he cracked the door open.

Twirling around in her chair to glare at the man, she saw her father's mass of red hair that framed his face as he poked his head inside. Her lips pulled up at the side as the memory of when she yelled at him a few weeks ago came to mind. He had barged into her workspace, completely unannounced, causing her to ruin the robot she had been working on. It was the whole reason behind his behavior now. He was far too afraid of pissing her off again so his movements were cautious and withdrawn.

"It's alright, you can come in," Maka drawled out as she lounged back in the chair, folding her arms across her chest.

 _What did he want now?_ she thought.

He only ever came to her for two reasons: either he wanted her to do something he was too scared to do himself, or one of his mistresses were staying over for the night. If it were the latter, that meant there was a book hiding behind his back.

Sighing, she thought,  _why did I have to be stuck with such a kiss-ass of a father?_

Maka noticed that there was no book in his hand when he stepped inside, but in its regular place was an envelope. Her heart leapt with joy as her mind raced with excitement that it was her acceptance letter. However, dread was quick to take its place since the envelope either contained good or bad news.

"The mailbot brought this for you today." Spirit carefully weighed the envelope in his hand as he gave his daughter a knowing look. "Feels kind of heavy. Maybe it's your acceptance letter."

Maka bolted toward him – knocking her chair over in the process – and snatched the envelope out of his hand. She felt the contents within it burn through the yellow paper as she held it in her grasp. Her entire future boiled down to this one moment whether it was an acceptance or rejection letter.

Taking a deep breath she pressed the envelope to her chest and said a silent prayer to the gods before sliding her finger along the top and pulling out the letter. Her eyes drank in every letter as they scanned the white paper and processed their meaning before she came upon the one word she'd been searching for the entire time. Her heart back flipped in her chest while her mind flashed every synonym of the word.

"I was accepted!" she squealed. Her mouth tugged up into the widest smile her face had seen in months, and she squirmed with excitement, hips swaying from side to side. Then, for the first time in nearly three years, Maka rushed forward to hug her father.

The wind was knocked out of him, but he still managed a congratulations as he returned the hug.

Spirit was bewildered by the sudden sign of affection as he stepped back to regain his sense of gravity. He relished in the feeling of his daughter's arms around him. With each passing second, he hoped that the moment would last a little longer. It had been so long since his daughter had so much as touched him, so a hug was heaven to him.

However, Maka's eyes snapped open as she remembered the reason behind her hatred for the man. She unraveled herself from his arms and gently pushed away from his chest. The only reason she had hugged the man was because he was the sole person in the room; if anyone else had been there in the moment, she would have opted for them instead. Rubbing her hands down the seam of her skirt to smooth out the invisible wrinkles, she watched as her father's face grew crestfallen at the sudden loss of physical contact before she spoke again.

"Yep," she sighed happily, "I was accepted… which means I'll be leaving home in two weeks. Gotta train to become as good a pilot as Mama was." Her smile was weak as she watched the light fade from his green eyes.

She was upset as well that she was going to be leaving not only her father but also the place she had called home for the last sixteen years. Maka wasn't such a selfish and heartless person to the point that she didn't feel  _anything_  toward the man standing in front of her. From the goggles hugging his head to the leather combat boots on his feet, she loved all of him. The only exception to her love was that he had cheated on her mother with various women throughout the years – it was something she could never let go of, no matter how hard she tried.

He didn't only hurt her mother. He also hurt her.

"Yes. That's the whole reason you applied, isn't it?" Spirit turned as if he were going to leave, but hesitated the last minute to look back at her. His eyes were sad like a puppy that had been kicked, and when he placed his hand on her shoulder, she felt a weight on her chest as her throat became tighter.

"Make me proud, okay?" She immediately missed the pressure and warmth from his hand as he walked out the door with a small click.

A guilt shot through Maka's chest as she digested his words, and it felt like a knife had been thrust into her heart. An invisible force slowly turned the cool metal, and as it dug itself further into her, the pain coursed through her body, crippling her. His words meant more to her than she expected them to as they stirred emotions she thought had been dormant for a long time.

Maka dropped to the floor as she placed her head in her hands and her elbows on her knees. Her body shook as fat tears escaped from her eyes and fell onto the hem of her skirt, staining the satin material. It felt like hours had passed as she remained in the same position until the sun finally set and the moon took its place in the sky. The glow shining in from her window created a halo effect as it reflected off her blonde hair.

Once the tears had subsided and her body had calmed down, she stood up, straightened out her clothes, and left the small shed.

She would definitely make her father proud.

* * *

As Soul stood in front of the gates to Shibusen Training Academy, he marveled at the architecture of the buildings that loomed over his head. The mixture of brass and silver that embellished each of them gave off an eerie feeling that felt more like home than his actual home. Along the columns, around the windows, and even on the doors there were mechanical parts plastered onto the design, reminding him of the workings of a clock pried open. He clearly heard the faint ticking noise from an unknown source hitting his ears as he stared at them. Everything around him felt familiar and comforting even though he had never been to Death City before.

Beyond the gates, people of all ages walked the grounds - students like him along with older gentlemen and gentlewomen - and each sported different attire that reminded Soul of the Victorian-era he had studied while growing up. The men wore tweed vests with long sleeve shirts underneath - most likely made out of silk like his own - and dark colored trousers either tucked into boots or coming a few inches away from loafers. The women wore corsets with poofy tops underneath, skirts and tights of various colors with different designs, and a variety of boots that ranged from combat to short heeled.

For the first time in his life, Soul was grateful he had listened to his father when he suggested he wear the more expensive clothes that were expected of a boy from his background rather than ones that were more commonly seen on a poor boy. Even though Soul knew in the back of his mind that he would blend in with the people around him, he felt like he was suffocating as the fear of having to be a proper and well brought-up boy given his prestigious family's reputation crawled on his skin. When he was accepted into the academy, he had wanted to leave the world of sophistication where it belonged: in his past.

Soul hitched his bag further up his shoulder as he stepped beyond the boundary of the gate and took his first step into the beginning of his new life.

The street was littered with loose gravel rather than the traditional cobblestone like the rest of the city, and the crunching sound hit his ears with each step as he walked atop them. After a while of walking, he found the area that was designated for the students enrolling in the Aerodynamics division of the academy (hinted at by a sign with a solar ship). Standing in the back of the line behind twenty or so teenagers, he stood on his tiptoes to see the front where a blonde woman was taking down names and giving instructions to each person individually.

As he awaited his turn, Soul looked around him and noticed that the others had brought pets along with them. Mechanical owls flew around their owner's heads - blowing out steam from their rears every few minutes - while small insects that seemed to be made out of spare parts sat on top of bags.

When he finally reached the front of the line, Soul gazed down at the woman to see that she was wearing a black eye patch. He found it slightly intimidating since eye patches were rare when it came to a person's clothing back in his hometown. However, it might have been possible that they were fairly common in Death City since no one before him seemed to notice.

"Hello," she greeted. Her voice was cheery and high pitched which struck a small nerve within Soul, and he found her even more intimidating. "What's your name?"

"Um, Soul. Soul Evans." He leaned forward a bit, trying to see what she wrote on the yellowed parchment, but his view was blocked by her hair as she bent down closer to it.

"Ah, yes. There you are. You'll be in cabin four along with five other people, one of which is your partner by the name of Maka Albarn." The woman smiled as she handed him a small brass key and a pamphlet.

Soul didn't take it right away. Instead he blinked twice, cocking his head slightly to the side in confusion.

"Partner?"

She nodded. "Mhm. You need a partner to fly the solar ships we use in the Aerodynamics division. Didn't Wes tell you that?"

He stiffened at the mention of his brother. "You know Wes?"

"I was one of the instructors for his class when he was here. He was a really fantastic flyer, and I'm excited to see another Evans in action again. I'm sure you're just as good as he was."

Soul only nodded as envy boiled his blood.

He tried his best not to snatch the key from the woman before making his way to cabin four. It was bad enough that he chose to come to the same academy as Wes, but the fact that there was someone who knew his family lineage made it even worse. He had a feeling they were going to expect him to excel even more than his brother ever had, or be just as good as Wes was. Deep down in his heart he knew they were going to be disappointed in him, exactly like everyone else.

While Soul was fantastic when he flew alongside his brother, he was never able to do or learn half the things Wes did. Soul had always been instructed under the guidance of his older brother, and he feared that he had learned nothing from him throughout the years.

Once he found his cabin, Soul stared at the dark mahogany door for a while before taking a deep breath and looking up at the sky. The smog from the city around him made it appear hazy as the bright blue fought to shine through. Throughout the years, the sky had become a comfort for him – a saving grace when he felt overwhelmed – because it was the one place he was able to really think. His thoughts were able to become one with the empty space up there with nothing to intervene. Soon he was going to be up there once again as he maneuvered one of the solar shops during his training to become a protector for Death City.

Placing the key into its rightful spot, he unlocked the door and pushed it open. The inside of the cabin was bigger than he thought it would be as it held six four-poster beds total. Each one was accompanied by its own dresser and a curtain that was intended for privacy - something he was definitely going to be using every chance he found. The color scheme reflected the buildings in the rest of the city; gold and silver mixed together along the mahogany trim, making him feel at home and peaceful once again. Soul felt every muscle in his body relax as the comfort of his new living quarters washed over him.

Soul looked around the room and spotted the other occupants - his soon-to-be roommates for the year - lounging on their own respective beds. The only other boy in the room with him wore a black suit with dark goggles wrapped around his neck, but that wasn't what had caught Soul's attention. His eyes had snapped to the boy's hair which was braided and beaded in a way that it almost looked like mechanical feathers that resembled a style he was familiar with: cyberlocks.

However, it was rare that men wore it from where Soul had come from since it was a style that women preferred.

The bustier of the girls had black curls that cascaded down her shoulders and a small hat gently perched on top. The light pink and dark red of her skirts ruffled around her and mixed together in a way that reminded him of a flower he once saw in his grandmother's garden. Soul's eyes drifted away from them, and fell upon the blonde girl who was laying on her stomach in her own bed. She was the only one who hadn't bothered to spare him even so much as a glance since the moment he walked in, and for some off reason it struck a small nerve with him.

The dark haired girl followed his line of vision and leaned over to poke the other girl's arm. "Maka, I think your partner's here," she whispered.

The blonde swung her legs over the bed and sat up to get a proper look at him before walking over toward the door. She didn't wear skirts or high heeled boots like the other girl, but rather wore trousers that resembled a man's. Her pigtails and goggles gave off a more laid-back and welcoming feel, but her combat boots told him she meant business. She didn't appear to have much knowledge when it came to the art of flying, but if either of them were going to fail and fall face first, they might as well do it together.

A team who fucked things up together was the best kind.

"Hi, I'm Maka Albarn." Her voice was sweet, and the smile she gave him was warm as she extended her hand.

Taking her hand in his, he said, "Soul… Evans"

Maka's eyes bulged, and her smile grew. "So you're Soul?" He nodded. "And you're my partner?"

He nodded again.

He wasn't entirely sure what she was going to next as he felt the excitement buzz off her body so he took a cautious step back, but it was no use. She stood closer to him, her face inches away from his as she invaded his personal space, and clutched his hand between both of hers. Leaning as far away from her as physically possible without falling on his ass, he sneered at her while the other boy let out a loud, obnoxious laugh.

"We're going to be a fantastic team, I just know it!" her tone was so optimistic that he had to agree with her; she was far too peppy for him and he wasn't sure how their partnership was going to be.

"Yeah, I'm sure of it… but could you maybe lay off the invasion of my personal space a bit?"

She cocked her head to the side. "Hmm?"

Glancing down in what little space there was between them, he indicated what he meant, and she seemed to understand as she backed away and dropped his hands in the process.

"Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. I guess I was just a little too excited."

Soul nodded and looked around the room, not wanting to continue their conversation. "So which bed is mine?"

"Umm, well…" Maka's eyes scanned the space around her before turning to the other two people for help.

The dark haired girl stood up from the bed and walked over to the pair in order to assist the blonde with the situation.

"We were hoping to have the partners sleep beside each other, but with the set up being as it is, that'll be a little difficult." Soul bit back the sarcastic remark that popped into his mind. "I'm Tsubaki, by the way."

"Nice to meet you," he said as he shook her hand.

"I suppose you could take the bed across from mine," Maka broke in.

Soul glanced toward the bed she indicated, and noted that it was the furthest one away from the other ones in the room. "It'll work."

He walked over toward it and dropped his bag on top of the covers. Rubbing his hands through his untamable white hair, he thanked the heavens he didn't wear his own goggles that day. It would have been embarrassing if he and his partner were dressed the same. It was worst enough that their personalities were already so conflicting with one another. While she seemed to be perky and sunshine, a total morning person, he was gloomy and rainstorms. There was no possible way they were going to be soul drift compatible when the time came.

Moving slightly so that the others were in his visual, he watched as Maka lightly joked and laughed with whom he supposed were her friends. They appeared to be friendly with each other already as they fell into a comfortable atmosphere that was only attainable with years of knowing someone, and a small pang of jealousy shot through his chest. If making friends came easy for her, they were definitely not going to be the perfect team.

Redirecting his attention back to his bed, Soul flipped his bag open and dumped his belongings on top of the sheets in order place them in their rightful places. He tried to remove all thoughts about the people standing behind him by blocking out the laughter that drifted toward him every now and then. There were times were he preferred to be a loner, but friendship was something his heart had yearned for, especially when it came to being in a new place like the one he was in now. Even someone like him wondered what it felt like to have people who cared for him that didn't consist of only his brother, but dreams and wants were futile if he had learned anything throughout the years.

One of the floorboards creaked behind him, and Soul turned around to see Maka standing there with a gentle smile playing at the corners of her mouth.

"What do you want?" he asked. His tone sounded rude and harsh which caused him to flinch (he had been raised better than that), but it didn't seem to faze her.

"I was wondering if you'd like to come join us."

Soul looked from her to the other two, who were both watching them with eager expressions, and then back to Maka.

Licking his lips, he shrugged and dropped the things in was holding. "Don't have anything else better to do."

She lightly bounced on her toes and grabbed his hand to pull him toward the others. "I promise they don't bite," she stage whispered over her shoulder.

"Good. I would hate to get rabies or some other life threatening disease on my first day."

"Maka might be lying there. I'll bite ya if you taunt me," the boy said with a small smirk. "Name's Black Star."

The girl holding his hand still only rolled her eyes. "Ignore him. He acts all big and tough, but he really isn't."

Sitting down on the edge of one of the beds, he watched as the people around him picked up where their conversation had left off. He felt out of sorts among them – completely out of his normal element – but they didn't seem to mind how quiet he was. Occasionally they tried to include him in the conversation by asking him questions about his past experience with solar ships, if he had any, but they were questions he rather not answer. Instead, he steered the converstion in a different direction.

He wasn't entirely ready to admit he had flown before or the fact that his older brother was a veteran.

Those were things they didn't need to know. At least not yet.

* * *

Maka's eyes wandered over to her new partner as she carelessly laughed at one of Star's lame ass jokes.

When she looked at him, she thought of a lonesome boy who had grown up in a world where he was alone and didn't have many close friends. It was the only thing that explained the way he had reacted when she held his hands. Maka noticed it in his eyes when she had leaned in far too close to him; there was something hidden beneath those crimson eyes that reminded her of a hurt, frail little puppy that had been kicked one too many times. Even the way he looked told her his childhood must not have been the easiest thing ever – she was only able to imagine the ridicule he must have endured.

It was understandable why he had chose not to join them at first.

She decided as she sat that there that throughout their time together, she would be the one who showed him that not everyone was so judgmental when it came to people who were different from them. Hell, she was friends with Black Star for crying out loud. The boy had electric blue hair with robot metal contraptions in it and he was annoying as hell. Surely Soul wasn't worse than him.

Plus, she had sensed something interesting about him when they touched; tingles had shot from her hand and up her arm. It had never happened with anyone else, and she was curious to find out why.

* * *

The next month marked the beginning of their training which consisted mostly of ground combat and how to use their weapons – a gun along with a razor sharp knife. It wasn't until after the combat training that the students learned how to control the ships and the basics of launch protocol. Then, a couple of months later, Soul and Maka were able to finally pick out their solar ship and practice their flying skills without an instructor acting as the third wheel. In all honesty, it shocked Maka how well her and Soul worked as a team. She felt like she was being a little too bossy at times, but it worked and came naturally to the pair.

Even the way the fought alongside each other felt natural, almost like they were breathing and moving like one unit. Marie had told them that she had never seen another pair that was like them – including Maka's own parents.

After about three months of playful banter and subtle praises on her part - things that could be taken as flirtatious behavior from anyone watching - he was slowly starting to warm up to her. Every now and then, she found him reaching out to clasp her hand without being prompted to and for absolutely no reason. The first time it had occurred, she was surprised; he had been startled by someone's robotic pet snake that had escaped from its cage only to take a liking to Soul's shoe strings and followed him around everywhere. After that, he started holding her hand every chance he had to the point that Maka started doing it on her own, even when it was unnecessary.

Arriving to the ship port where the student solar ships were located – hand in hand – Maka allowed Soul to pick theirs out. After watching him admire their instructor's ship for the last couple months, it was the least she could do. His eyes had glittered with excitement and drool occasionally slid out from the corner of his mouth. It was nice to see him let his guard down for one moment in his life to show some real emotion rather than the familiar stoic position he held all the time.

She tried to keep up with him as he bounded down various aisles, going from ship to ship until he finally stopped in front what she hoped was  _the one_  after thirty minutes. When Maka caught up to him, she inspected the solar ship he was standing in front of. The ship's wings were coated in a gray finish along the top, and a golden color dusted the underside of the blades. Her body was a beautiful mixture of gold and white and gray, reminding Maka of a bird she had seen once in a picture book when she was younger.

"Is this the one?" Maka asked her partner.

He lightly shook his head as he tried to get rid of the schoolboy daze plastered on his face and nodded. Walking towards the ship, she reached out to brush her fingers delicately over the nose, admiring the black finish, and noticed small golden flecks speckled into it.

"She's beautiful," she breathed out. "What are you gonna name her?"

Soul cocked his head to the side, a small grimace on his face. "Huh?"

"What are you gonna name her?" After a moment, he still looked confused so she elaborated. "Most pilots name their solar ships, Soul. Didn't you know that?"

Comprehension dawned on him as he glanced back toward the ship. "Oh… I didn't really think of that."

A short pause passed between the pair. "What about Grigori?"

He raised a white eyebrow before asking, "and what exactly does that mean, Miss I'm going to use big word to confuse my damn partner because I'm a know it all?"

She fought the urge to wack him and instead smiled gently as she told him. "It's Russian for watcher. I thought it would be nice since that's along the same lines of what we'll be doing, and it does sound pretty cool, don't you think?"

He mulled it over for a few minutes before nodding his head in agreement. "Yeah, it does sound pretty cool." He threw her a smirk, and pointed his thumbs toward his chest as he said very cockily, "and I am a really cool guy."

Maka was used to his obsession with being cool, but still rolled her eyes since she found it completely lame. However, the teasing between them came naturally that she hardly ever passed up a moment to do so. "And are all  _cool_ guys frightened by a mechanical snake?"

She giggled as he flinched before throwing her a glare. "That was  _one_ time, wing nuts. Do you have to bring it up every single time?"

"I'll stop when it starts getting old."

"Well, it's getting old  _now_."

"Says you and only you." She rushed around to the left side, propping the door up and sat down in the plush copper colored seat. "Do you wanna fly this thing or just stand around bickering all day?"

The smile on his face was the biggest one she had ever seen as he mimicked her actions on the right side of the ship. Soul's side had the steering wheel while Maka's had the computer screen that showed the gauges, navigation, and a screen that show cased their soon to be missions. As she strapped herself in, Maka glanced over at Soul. He gave her a reassuring smile and a thumbs up before asking if she was ready for the next part. She nodded as she took a deep breath, and they both reached out to grab the helmets sitting in front of them. Slipping the helmets on, they waited for the soul drift to begin.

It felt weird to be connected with someone else's mind as a whirlwind of disconnected images flashed before her. They were every single one of his memories from the moment he was a small boy up until now. Each one was a blur of colors and sounds as they moved around her, making it impossible for her to capture anything solid. However, there were a few key ones that stood out amongst the rest.

She saw his hands flying across an ancient piano as they played a creepy song, a man who looked to be a few years older than Soul sitting beside him in a solar ship similar to the one he had picked for them, the same man standing in front of a beautiful stained glass window of a dragon circling the moon, and a garden filled with white and gold honeysuckles while an elderly woman bent down in front of them.

The only memories that were solid and viewable for each partner pair were the ones that held a significance to them; the ones that resided in their hearts even when they themselves weren't aware of it.

When the images stopped, her eyes trained back on Soul, and she watched as his experience slowly began to end. As he returned her gaze, a hint of worry flashed across his eyes. They had just shared their most intimate moments with someone they met only a few months ago. It was a nerve wracking feeling knowing someone had learned more things about them that not even those close to them were aware of, but there was also a comfort behind it.

Her biggest fear, however, was which memories he had seen of hers. Maka was only able to guess if her mother had appeared somewhere in them, or if the way she had treated her father once the divorce was finalized had been shown to him. No one but the people involved were aware of either of them, especially not the pedestal she placed her mother on. Neither Tsubaki nor Black Star were aware of how she had treated her father throughout the years.

But the memories he had seen didn't matter; they were one now. Their minds were attached and there was no going back.

Maka broke their staring contest as she turned to check that the gauges were where they needed to be before telling Soul they were ready for their first flying experience together. There wasn't an instructor guiding them on how to fly or taking turns to get used to anything. They were truly going to be on their own this time, and Maka felt the excitement about it bubbling up in the pit of her stomach.

However, their minds weren't used to working alongside each other so it took them awhile to get used to navigating. After a few failed attempts, they were eventually able to get the hang of it. The ship bounced up and down slightly as it hovered over the ground before slowly moving out of the spot.

It felt weird having a connection with someone through their mind; she felt his mind buzzing in the back of hers as every one of his thoughts entered and infested it. She wasn't entirely sure how comfortable she was with the thought that he was able to read her mind, but it gave her a thrill that crawled along her skin.

Through their connection, she found out he considered her to be his closest friends which made her heart warm and her stomach squirm of their own accord.

Maka came to realize as the months passed that Soul really did enjoy flying. The edges of his mouth pulled up into a wide smile and his eyes sparkled with life unlike their normal bored appearance. Sometimes he let the top down so that the wind blew through his hair; it flipped his snowy locks around his face and for the briefest of moments she thought he was beautiful. It was the only moment he actually looked alive, and she enjoyed every second of it. She wasn't familiar with the sensation it gave her – the gut wrenching, heart stopping, sweaty palms reaction her body had were all new – but she it was definitely something she wanted to feel forever.

"Did you enjoy that ride?" she asked as she jumped out of the ship.

Soul stepped out of the cockpit, a grin on his face, and shook out his hair to tame even though that was entirely out of the question. "Fuck yeah. You?"

"Could have done without all the air, but other than that, I think it was our best ride yet." Maka readjusted her pigtails, placing the strands that escaped back in.

"Eh, you like when I let the top down. I know you do." He walked around the nose of the ship to where she stood and playfully ruffled her hair.

She swatted his hand away and fixed her hair once again. "Even if I did, I wouldn't admit to it."

"I would say that's a confession right there."

"Trust me, it isn't." Maka grabbed his hand and led him away from Grigori. "Now, come on. We need to report to Stein."

Soul lowly growled. "Do we  _have_ to? Stein gives me the creeps as it is."

"You know we do. It's part of protocol." They climbed the steps to the main building where their teacher was located, and entered through the double doors. "Besides, we'll be able to go on missions soon. Doesn't that at least make you a little excited?"

"Oh, joy," he mocked

"Calm down with the enthusiasm there. You might scare people away." Soul only grunted in response.

As they entered Stein's dingy office, the strange smell of formaldehyde wafted up their noses, crinkling the skin around that area. The room itself was a mixture of different gray tones mixed together with smoke that was leftover from the instructor's bad habit. Compared to the other teacher's offices, the lighting was darker which made it for them to see for a while as their eyesight adjusted to the difference. The instructor himself was lounging back in his chair, staring up at them with no emotion on his face. Between him and Soul, it was hard to tell who was more stoic.

Stein's voice was low and raspy from smoking when he spoke. "Ah, Soul and Maka. Welcome back. How was your little trip? Good, I hope."

"It was great." Maka answered for them. "I think we're really getting the hang of flying our ship."

"Great. Glad to hear that." Stein rolled over in his chair to the desk situated behind him and turned on the computer. The screen popped up against the wall, and Maka watched as he scrolled through different files until he finally settled on one as he double clicked it. A few minutes passed before Stein spoke again. "Looks like you two have finished the required hours for training and are ready to start taking missions." He spun around in the chair to face them. "Do you two think you're up for that?"

Maka glanced over to Soul, who shrugged, before turning back to Stein. "Yes. We're ready."

"I'll let Lord Death know, and we'll give you your first mission by next week." He turned back around to the screen. "You two are dismissed."

Soul and Maka left the office. They walked down the hallway with a little more spring in their step - mostly Maka while Soul lightly snorted at her behavior - excited for when the moment they received the call about their meeting with Lord Death to be assigned a mission, their  _first_ mission. Soon, she and Soul were going to be on their way to becoming full-fledged cadets for the Spartoi flying team.

 _And_ they were going to be a better duo than her own parents ever were.

* * *

He stood next to Maka as they waited for Lord Death to arrive to his office and give them their next practice mission. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched her bounce up and down on her toes, the excitement practically radiating off her skin.

"Calm down, wing nuts."

She gave him a small pout before turning back around at the sound of the door opening. The mystery behind whether Lord Death was a human or a cyborg had always baffled Soul. The headmaster of Shibusen Training Academy always wore a large white skull mask every time he made public appearance with a long black cloak draped around body that flowed out behind him as he walked. Even the childlike, high pitched voice he spoke with made the whole experience that much more confusing.

"Welcome back, Soul and Maka. How did you two fair on your last mission?" he asked.

"We did a great job, Lord Death." Maka, ever the teacher's pet, took a step forward and placed her hands behind her back as she beamed up at the headmaster. "Soul and I patrolled the area around the old factory mill and there wasn't anything suspicious."

"Great, wonderful! I'm glad to hear that. Now," the computer screen behind him surrounded by brass and copper pipes turned on, "this is your next mission."

The map on the screen zoomed in to the location where a village was located nearby until it showed what appeared to be golden ruins. Soul recognized their architecture as being similar to what historians believed to be one of the earliest civilizations for the city of Hellhound. "I need you two to patrol this area, same as before, searching for anything suspicious or out of the ordinary. Can you two do it?"

Maka gave a terse nod. "Yes, sir. We can do that."

"Very good. You two may go now."

Maka gave a small bow and twirled around, her skirts flowering out around her, and grabbed Soul's hand to lead him out of the office. They left the building to head to the ship dock where Grigori was currently sitting. When they were starting to get closer to their solar ship, Soul broke into small jog toward his baby before delicately rubbing his fingers across her hood.

"Did you miss daddy? Because he sure missed you."

Maka snorted from behind him. "I swear this ship's the only thing you'll ever really love in life."

"That's because she doesn't talk back to me, unlike some people I know," he snapped.

"Oh, and who could that possibly be?" she asked with feigned innocence.

"I don't know. Maybe some hot headed blonde that I was partnered with."

"Oh, her? I heard she was amazing."

"Yeah, amazingly annoying."

They entered the ship, each on their respective sides, buckled themselves in, and turned to their panels to start the engines.

"But, admit it, I'm the best partner you could ever have," she smiled.

Soul rolled his eyes. "Yeah, sure. Keep telling yourself that." Maka giggled. "Your side good?"

"Yep. Yours?"

"Yep."

"Then let's go."

Soon they were maneuvering their way out of the ship dock and into the vast openness of the sky. Soul put the roof down, as usual to feel the wind flying through his hair, and Maka automatically pulled her goggles down, completely used to his behavior. However, he wasn't the one at fault for enjoying the open air like he did. If anything, his older brother, Wes, was to blame, thanks to the countless times he took his younger brother out flying after he received his license.

* * *

A few hours later, they found themselves walking inside the golden ruins.

Soul had a feeling they weren't supposed to actually  _enter_ the ruins; they were only meant to patrol the area for suspicious behavior. However, Maka was insistent when it came to at least exploring some of it, and he always found it difficult to argue with her when she pulled that innocent puppy routine of hers. If he weren't such a cool guy he might admit he found her absolutely adorable when she did it. Her bottom lip always jutted out and those big beautiful green eyes became larger than normal. He held onto this secret for dear life no matter how weak in the knees she made him or how much his heart pounded against his chest.

Maka Albarn had become his weakness, but that was a fact he wasn't ready to admit yet.

In the last few months, she had slowly become his best friend. It was a feat he never expected her to accomplish – anyone to accomplish in truth – but she turned out to be different than he originally expected. Maka was a fighter and that was something he admired about her. She held her own against anyone, and her true beauty was kept within her heart. Her kind nature and ability to see the good in others when they didn't see it themselves had broken through his walls and defenses.

There was also the fact that she made him feel nervous when she too close to him, but that nervousness had nothing to do with being uncomfortable. His palms were always sweaty when she held his hand of her own accord, and his heart stopped when she said his name. Maka made him feel like a twelve year old boy and that was completely uncool. If Wes ever found out, he'd tease the poor boy until the day he died – probably even beyond that.

But the backflips his stomach was performing at that moment had nothing to do with her.

A cold chill crept up his spine as he glanced around the dilapidated building and little bumps pricked up on his skin. He didn't feel safe in the ruins, and every single one of his instincts were telling him to run. They should leave, but Maka was a stubborn person who refused to listen to him.

With her lantern being his only source of light, it illuminated a few feet in front of them as they walked along the wall but it wasn't enough. The underground ruins were eerily silent, and there were no other signs of life. Their footsteps echoed against the walls around them along with the occasional rock as it was kicked away by one of their boots, but that was it. Something wasn't right about the place.

"Look at these symbols. What kind of civilization do you think lived here before us? They look ancient." Her voice reverberated off the walls as she delicately brushed her fingers over the writings, afraid they'd crumble against her touch.

"I gotta bad feeling about this place, Maka. Are you sure we should even be in here?"

He looked around at the areas shrouded in darkness; he felt even more uncomfortable with their current situation because of it. It was the perfect place for any beast to live in and attack them when they were at their most vulnerable.

"You aren't scared, are you?"

"Ha! No. I just don't feel comfortable about this place, is all." There was a nervous tinge in his voice that didn't go unnoticed by Maka.

 _Why did I have to have a partner who was so observant?_  he thought.

"Oh really?" Her tone wasn't reassuring.

The smirk plastered on her face placed his nerves even more on end, and after a short starting contest, her eyes bulged and she pointed to something behind him. "What's that!?"

Soul's heart pounded even faster as he whirled around and stepped back closer to Maka to get away from the thing she pointed to – which turned out to be nothing. He was about to lash out at her when something crawled up his arm making him turn around to see what it was: Maka's fingers. She burst into a fit of giggles as she pointed at his face that was burning up at the embarrassment of being frightened by a puny little blonde.

"You. Should. See. The. Look. On. Your. Face," she said in between guffaws.

"Real funny." He slapped her finger away, crossed his arms, and threw his head to the side as he growled lowly. "I wasn't even scared."

Maka wiped away tears from her eyes and walked in front of him to examine his face for herself. "Uh huh. The look on your face says otherwise," she teased.

"I wasn't fucking scared, alright? Just hurry up and do your fucking exploring shit so we can get the fuck out of here."

She shrugged and walked farther along the wall of ruins. Her eyes searched each one as they drank all the information they were able to acquire in a similar way to the one she reserved especially for books. Soul reluctantly followed her, but kept his eyes focused on the darkness around them, searching for anything abnormal. If Maka wasn't going to be paying attention to their surroundings then he would.

He strained his eyes as he tried to stare into the thick blackness. He felt something or  _someone_ watching them within it; their eyes following their ever movement one, calculating them, and trying to determine the right moment to strike. Soul paused, his back facing toward Maka as he searched behind them. His pulse rose and his instincts were on edge as they readied themselves to take action if need be. Even his palms were sweating as he curled his fingers into a fist.

Something wasn't right; he felt it rattle in his bones.

A few minutes passed, Maka mumbling behind him about her latest find along the wall, and that was when he heard it; an eerie whisper emitting from the darkness.

"My blood is black."

Shivers travelled down his spine as he slowly searched around to see who had said it – noting that Maka was still in her own world and unaware of their new companion.

The creature emerged from the darkness, its cyborg eye gleaming red as it slowly walked into the glow of the lantern. The rest of its body appeared to be half robot and half human; a mechanical arm on one side and a human-esque one on the other, and its magenta hair framed its face as a few strands fell in front. Soul's nose scrunched up as a grotesque smell crawled up his nostrils that smelled like spoiled eggs and gasoline, but the creature's smile was the creepiest aspect about it. It pulled up at the sides, but there were no emotions emitting from its one humanoid eye.

"My blood is black," it said again.

This time, its robot arm transformed into a black sword and swung it across its chest as it took a step forward. Soul watched as it made its way toward Maka, flinging the sword out to the side, readying itself for the attack, and that's all it took for him to determine his next move.

"Maka! Look out!"

Everything slowed down as Soul ran the few feet that were between him and his partner. He watched as she turned to see the reason behind his yelling before he thrust his body out in front of her – shielding her from the attack. His arms flailed away from him in a protective stance as he took the sword straight to the chest and his blood spewed out in front of him.

The last thing he remembered hearing before blacking out was Maka's anguished screams as she yelled out his name.


	2. This Broken Soul

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: suicide reference

Soul's voice rang out with fear when he called out her name, drawing all her attention toward him.

A surge of panic rushed through Maka's body as her entire world suddenly started to move in slow motion. She whipped around to see the reason for his sudden outburst, her blonde pigtails fanning out from the momentum, and caught sight of the cyborg from the corner of her eye before turning around completely. Fear flowed through her veins as the creature's red eye glinted at her, and an unfamiliar, uncomfortable chill crept over her body. Her first instinct was to run, but when she tried to force her body to do so, nothing happened; she remained rooted to the ground.

Maka closed her eyes and waited for her inevitable death as the creature raised its left arm to swing the sword at her. She swallowed the lump in her throat, a soothing chill washing over her body as it accepted its fate. Suddenly, a whoosh of air slammed against her, and Maka opened her eyes to see Soul standing in front of her. He thrust his arms out protectively, fingers splayed open, legs braced for the impact, and the realization struck at the sight; he was going to take the hit for her. She silently pleaded with him to move, trying to force the small word to escape from her mouth, but nothing happened.

Soul remained in front of her.

Then, without warning, her world sped up, and the sword swung down diagonally. It sliced across Soul's chest, and bright red spurts of blood splashed out of him. The desire to scream was strong as her heart clenched, but she remained silent. Standing there frozen in time, shock and fear washed over her body like a constraint as she watched her partner fall to the ground. A sticky warmth clung to her calves as little drops of blood fell on the creature, but she was only vaguely aware of it. Thoughts of Soul dying swirled around in her mind, and her chest grew heavier as her worst nightmare came to life.

He was going to die and it was all her fault.

"Soul!"

Her voice didn't sound normal. It cracked at his name, the desperation and urgency plain as day within it as she watched her partner's body crumple down in front of her.

 _Please don't die_ , she thought.  _Please still be alive._

Soul fell to his knees, arms limp at his side and head hanging low, before he dropped face first on the pavement beneath him. Maka's breath came out in small rasps as her heart pounded against her chest, her blood roaring in her ears. Ignoring the creature as it watched the pair, she fell to her knees in despair; the red pool of blood trickling from Soul's body was warm and sticky to the touch as she crawled toward the boy laying in front of her. He didn't move when she placed her hand on the nape of his neck, but the warmth radiating off his skin and the faint pulse told her he was still alive.

But he wasn't going to last long.

They needed to get out of there.

Soul needed help.

Maka looked up at the evil creature through watery eyes as tears began to form, and stared at it, waiting for it to make its next move. If it wanted to kill them, then she was going to let it.

She didn't have anything to protect herself with.

Her partner was dying.

Their situation was hopeless.

She was sitting there completely defenseless, yet it remained standing still. Under the creature's calculating gaze, studying her like she did with her books back in their cabin, she felt helpless. Silently she hoped – prayed – they were the same books that she was going to be able to read if this thing spared their lives.

But nothing happened, and Maka was getting tired of the staring contest.

"Well, what the hell do you want?! If you're gonna kill us, then do it already, you fucking bastard!"

She didn't normally use such vulgar language, but considering Soul's life was slowly drifting away from her, desperate times called for desperate measures. There had been countless times where she had seen Soul and Black Star use the same colorful words to get what they wanted, and a part of her hoped for the same results now.

Suddenly, a high pitched screeching filled the ruins. It sounded like scratches against a chalkboard as it scraped against her eardrums, making her face scrunch up in pain. Maka quickly cupped her hands over her ears, hoping to block out as much sound as possible, but refused to move her eyes away from the creature as it turned in the direction of the unknown source and began walking toward it. Whatever the sound was, it seemed to be the creature's call to retreat. Maka was alone again after a few minutes, save for Soul - who remained motionless on the ground - and the screeching stopped.

But she didn't have time to celebrate.

Carefully, she flipped Soul's body over, and gently laid him down on his back to investigate the cut bisecting his chest. It didn't appear to be deep, but there was enough blood coming out to tell her he didn't have much time. Judging by the length of the cut, it could be fatal if someone didn't look at it soon.

Maka stood up to walk toward his head, and kneeled down on her hind legs to hoist him up by the nook of his armpits to drag him back out to the ship. It took her a while to get there as she stumbled on a few rocks that were in her way, but they made it without further injury. She laid him down on the ship's floor, trying to fit him in like a mismatched puzzle piece in the little space available, before going to the monitor on her side of the cockpit. There was no way she was going to be able to fly the ship back to Shibusen on her own, and she needed to call in backup.

Unfortunately for her, that also meant admitting her own mistake.

"You've reached Emergency Back-Up for Shibusen Training Academy. You are currently speaking with Mira Nygus. Is this the department you meant to call?" the sweet voice of the academy's nurse said.

"Yes! It's Maka Albarn, one of the flying officers for Flight 42, ship Grigori, and I need someone out here immediately."

"And what, may I ask, is the emergency?"

Maka had an inkling that Mira knew what had happened.

She felt like the woman was able to read it on the poor blonde's face before the words even came spilling out of her mouth.

"It's all my fault. I suggested that we should explore the ruins we were meant to scope out, and there was an accident. Some kind of creature found us in there, and my partner, Soul Evans, is hurt. Please send someone out here quickly! He doesn't have much time!" Her voice broke on the last word, and Maka had to look down to hide her tears.

"I'll send Stein over there in the medical ship immediately. And Maka," The blonde looked up, her cheeks stained, "Don't worry. No matter how grand his injuries are, Soul will be in capable hands, okay?"

Her gut sensed the lie behind the woman's voice, but she still nodded nonetheless. "Thank you, Nygus."

Maka left the monitor once it blacked out and walked over to where Soul's head lay. His face looked peaceful with his mouth open and eyes shut, and, it looked like he was sleeping rather than passed out from shock and blood loss. Sitting criss cross, Maka gently picked his head up and cradled him in her lap. Stroking a few strands away from his forehead, she wet his white hair as her tears fell delicately on the edges. She whispered her apologies and promises onto unhearing ears and told him it was all her fault. She swore to never stray from protocol again, and from now on, his safety was going to be top priority for her.

For as long as she lived, something like this was not going to happen again.

* * *

The medical ship finally arrived thirty minutes later. Stein, along with his medic team, hauled Soul safely out of Grigori and into their ship before whisking off faster than lightspeed back to his emergency lab. Maka knew her partner was in capable hands - albeit maybe not entirely trustworthy hands – and that was comforting enough. She breathed a sigh of relief and clutched her hands to her chest as she tried to suppress the emotions welling up inside. Strong arms wrapped around her neck, pulling her in close to the chest of the person whom she had neglected months ago.

"He'll be fine, sweetie," her father said. "Stein doesn't want to lose him, trust me. Even though it pains me to say this, Soul is the best cadet the academy has seen since… well, since his older brother was here."

Maka nodded as the rumors she had heard when her and Soul entered their first training session resurfaced in her mind. Wes Evans had undergone training a few years before Soul came along, and according to everyone around them, he was one of the best pilots they had seen in years. A familiar warmth spread over her chest as her partner was compared to the one person he felt inferior to throughout his time at the academy. There had been a few nights when he confided in her that his goal was to become as good a pilot as his brother, even being half as good was sufficient for him.

A few minutes passed as father and daughter stood in silence outside Grigori before Spirit spoke again. "Shall we fly the ship back, then?"

"I would like that," she whispered

In actuality, she didn't want to go through the process of resonating with her father. She preferred the academy to have sent a complete stranger, someone whose past… promiscuous behavior she wasn't fully aware of. She definitely did not want to see the faces of the other women he'd been with. It was bad enough that she had known he was sneaking around behind her mother's back when she followed him as a child and the mere thought of resonating with him made her sick to her stomach.

However, she also wasn't able to tell her father no; if she left Grigori, Soul was going to have a pissy-princess fit, she just knew it. He treated the damn thing like it was his own child.

When Maka resonated with her father, it wasn't as bad as she had originally expected. There were no images of women underneath or on top of Spirit, nor were there any of him being at the local bar downtown taking drinks from his favorite waitress. Really, Maka was thankful that resonating only showed a person's important memories, because what she saw surprised her.

Spirit's favorite memories were mostly of her and her mother, living their happy lives before he went and looked for something more on the side. She saw the day Maka was born as Spirit cradled a tiny baby in his arms, her father reading her a book when she was younger, her mother talking about her experiences at work over dinner one night, and the day she received her acceptance letter from the academy. They were all nice and made Maka wish she was a better daughter to him. They also made her wonder what her favorite memories were, and if her father was in any of them.

* * *

Soul was still in surgery under the watchful eye of Stein when they made it back to the academy.

Maka sat outside in the waiting room, counting the seconds as they passed by. It was horrible. It was agonizing to worry about whether or not her partner was going to come out alive and well. The ticking of the small table clock on the receptionist's desk sounded louder than normal as it beat against her eardrums and grew louder the longer she remained there. Each tick meant she was closer to his verdict, and each stirred up new fears within her.

Images of him lying dead on the operation table or coming out of surgery only to inform that he wanted a new partner flooded through her mind. They reminded her that no matter what happened, it was all her fault. If she hadn't suggested they enter the ruins, if they had done exactly what they were supposed to, then Soul's life wouldn't have been dangling on a short string. The gaping wound across his chest wouldn't have been there, and he would be sitting beside her in the mess hall, eating dinner and joking around with their friends.

He would have been happy instead, and she would have been to see him smile one more time; his perfect, wonderful, sharp toothed smile that reached his eyes on the best of days.

His smile was the one thing she'd miss the most if anything were to happen to him.

Maka brought her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them as she dug her head in-between. The tears were silent, but they felt hot on her bare skin and rolled down her thigh to rest within the fabric of her skirt. The pain in her heart was the worst; it felt like someone was standing on her, pressing her insides down against each other, and crushing the poor muscle. It felt like she was experiencing Dante's Inferno. All she wanted was to have Soul beside her as he held her hand, reassuring her everything was going to be alright.

The only person Maka wanted at that moment was her partner.

She needed Soul more than he would ever know.

* * *

He knew it was a dream, was able to  _tell_  it was dream because of how abstract and uncomfortable his surroundings were. None of the rooms at the academy had maroon curtains covering every inch of the walls, and none of them held an old fashioned gramophone playing scratchy jazz tunes he'd never heard before either.

From his position on the floor, Soul looked up at the ceiling to see that it was covered in some sort of black substance, the same kind that reminded him of the darkness from his nightmares long ago. He felt the fear and anxiety from his old life slowly start to resurface. They were the same things he had believed – hoped – he was done with, but now as he laid there, he realized that he wasn't.

Soul pushed himself off the ground and noticed that the color scheme on the floor mirrored the curtains and ceiling, only in a checkered format. He looked around at the rest of his surroundings, trying to get a proper feel of the place. The lone lamp was barely bright enough for him to see properly, the dim glow more eerie than illuminating, but he was still able to see enough to come to a clear consensus.

He was completely alone, save for the inanimate objects around him; there were no other people in the room and, besides the music, it was silent. Even if he loved being alone, something about this type of alone didn't sit right with him.

This type of alone felt haunting.

It made him feel like no one in the world supported or liked him; it made him want to give up on life. It was horrible, and sickening, and his stomach turned inside out. He hadn't felt this way since leaving home, since the fight about fucking up his life he had with his father.

Or at least not since he became closer to Maka.

She was the first person he actually felt close to in a long time. Wes used to hold that position before abandoning Soul to attend the academy, leaving him to fend for himself against their parents. Maka was the only person he was really able to call his best friend, the only one who supported him, and she was the only person he wanted now.

Standing up completely, he searched for a way out of this twisted dream of his and back to reality. He wasn't alone  _there_. He still had Maka and she was better than nothing,  _much_  better.

He placed his hand on the curtain as he walked along the wall, feeling for a door behind one of them, but came up short once he reached the end - or what he believed to be the end. Fear continued to manifest within him, expanding to every bone and fiber in his body, but the image of Maka appeared once again. He saw her scrunched-up face as she smiled at him; the way her eyes crinkled in the corners letting him know it was genuine. That was what motivated him now.

But before he was able to do anything more, he heard someone clapping. The sound reverberated in the room even though there was nothing for it to bounce off of. Soul turned in a circle, his eyes searching for the source until a voice called out to him.

"Oh, Soul, my boy. Wonderful of you to join me."

Soul remained searching for the new arrival. "Who the fuck are you?"

"Guess you don't recognize me, huh? We never did officially meet with one another before now. Always stuck as the voice in the back of your head, whispering dark secrets when you were but a small boy." A pause. "Do you remember now?"

Soul was confused. The voice was gravelly yet sensual at the same time – like an old time jazz musician's that he had listened to when he was younger. Surely it was the same type of voice that was remember able. Yet nothing was coming to mind.

A chill crept up Soul's spine when it spoke again.

"Hm, I can see you don't remember." The voice came from directly behind him this time. "Let me introduce myself then. You may call me Oni. I'm the embodiment of your self-doubt and fears. The same voice from your nightmares. Do you remember now?"

It took him a while to fit the pieces of the puzzle together, but he remembered who this Oni person was now. As the memories came back, the voice became more familiar. Oni was the same person who haunted his dreams growing up, reminding him of his failed attempts, encouraging him to quit every single time Soul had even a single doubt about something.

Soul regretted turning around to put a face with the voice immediately. The person wasn't a person at all; it was a short red demon with long pointy ears and a nose that was far too big for his face. Silver horns protruded from its head, bending in an odd angle, and thick black lines circled its eyes, connecting together in the center like a mask.

Soul gave the little demon his most menacing sneer. "Yeah, I do." His fear became a small wisp of smoke seeing as he was taller than his captor. "Now can you tell me where the fuck I am?"

"We're in the confines of your mind." The demon let out a small whistle as he looked around. "This room didn't used to exist here. It was created once you were attacked by that cyborg in the ruins… that partner of yours is a right little bitch for taking you in there."

"Don't fucking talk about Maka that way! She isn't a bitch and I went in the ruins of my own free will, got it? That attack wasn't her fault!"

The demon clicked his tongue. "I can see Maka's a touchy subject with you," he mumbled under his breath. "Then whose fault was it, Soulie?"

"Mine, alright!? I should have told her it was a stupid idea," he whispered the last part to himself. He addressed the demon again after a few moments. "How do I get out of here?"

"It's simple really." The grin on Oni's face was not comforting as he waited for Soul to respond.

Soul hesitated. "Really? What is it, then?"

"First, I need to do one thing."

What happened next caught Soul completely off-guard.

Oni thrusted his hand out towards Soul's heart – it was so fast he didn't have time to react, but the pain was excruciating. It felt like his body was on fire as the invisible flames engulfed him, and all he was able to do was scream out in anguish. He wanted it to be over as soon as it started. He wanted the pain to leave and – more importantly – he wanted out of this horrible nightmare. It was far worse than the ones he'd had before. This one felt like there was no escape, like he was trapped for all eternity, destined to suffer over and over again.

And just like that, the nightmare was over.

When he felt underneath him, he didn't feel the cold tiled floor from the nightmare, but sheets on top of a bed. As he became more aware of his surroundings, he heard the faint beeping of a machine and was only vaguely aware that he wasn't alone in the room. He knew the person's identity instantly as warmth spread across his chest, and his heart stopped for a millisecond when they placed their hand in his. Gently, he stroked his thumb across their hand.

"Soul?" came Maka's voice.

The dim lighting of the hospital room and the small crackle of a fire welcomed him as he looked toward his partner.

"Hey." his voice sounded hoarse from lack of usage. "Did I scare you?" he added, upon seeing the worried look on her face.

"How are you feeling?" Nygus asked upon entering the room right that minute, preventing Maka from answering his question.

"Uh, I have a small headache and there's a pain across my chest, but other than that, I feel fine."

"Well, I'm glad to see you're awake, at least. Poor Maka here was scared to death. Even refused to find a new partner under Lord Death's orders. Claimed you were going to be fine." Nygus gave Maka a small, knowing smile, and Soul caught the light pink tinge as it brushed against her cheeks.

"That's only because I know you, and I know you're a fighter. You wouldn't leave me," Maka quickly said, but the way she looked away told him another story.

Soul gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "Don't worry. No matter what happens to me, I won't leave you." Maka peeked at him behind the few strands of hair that had fallen in front of her face and gave him a weak smile. "How long was I out for?"

"About a week. Stein operated on you last Thursday. Can't really say he did a good job, though," Nygus said. She grabbed the clipboard hanging off the edge of his bed and walked around to check his monitors.

It was Maka who asked the question for him. "What do you mean?"

Nygus folded her arms across her chest, pressing the clipboard between her. "He'll have a pretty nasty scar there that won't ever fully heal. Stein's work this time around was a little sloppy. He didn't clean or stitch it up properly."

"Bastard," Maka whispered under her breath so that only Soul heard. He eyed his partner a little skeptically; her usage of such vulgar language was rare. It made him smile internally because that meant all the time they spent together was having an affect on her.

"I'll leave you two alone now." Nygus placed the clipboard back in its spot and smiled at the pair before leaving the room.

Not soon after Nygus left, Maka spoke. "Soul, I'm sorry…"

"For what?"

She fiddled with the hem of her skirt as she averted her eyes from his. "For… taking you down to the ruins with me. It – it was completely idiotic, and I shouldn't have done it. I'm sorry."

He reached out to grab her arm, and waited for her to look at him again. "Maka, it isn't your fault. I'm just as much to blame here. I knew we shouldn't have gone in there, but we did. What's done is done." Maka still didn't seem to believe him, though. Soul sighed. "I know it's hard, but promise me you'll try to forget the ruins and stop blaming yourself, okay?"

Maka chewed on her bottom lip as she contemplated her answer before giving a small nod. "I'll try."

* * *

However, in the weeks and months that passed by, she didn't.

Maka blamed herself in private, in the moments when she thought no one was watching, but he still noticed. The pair had been partners long enough that he was able to read her like one of the aerodynamic textbooks she poured over every night - one of the reasons behind the nickname 'wing nuts' he had for her. Her eyes periodically clouded over as she tormented herself about the past slowly became a red flag for him.

Even when they resonated before a mission, the ruins haunted the pair; they had embedded themselves as one of her new memories.

"Are you okay?" she asked before one of their missions one day.

Soul swallowed, too afraid to think about what he might see, but nodded nonetheless. Maka gave him a reassuring smile before turning to her helmet and placing it on her head as Soul mimicked her. Clutching the arm rests of his seat, he braced himself for the impact of her memories; every important detail in her life that she held onto dearly was going to be there.

The first memory he saw was the same. A smaller version of Maka sitting in her father's lap as he read to her from a fairy tale book, the same ash blonde pigtails she still wore on her head. Maka claimed she hated the man, but the fact that this memory remained transfixed in her heart said more about his partner than she was willing to admit. Spirit may have cheated on his wife and hurt his daughter in the process, but Maka still harbored strong feelings for him.

The next one was the day she received her acceptance letter to the academy, followed by the day her and Soul met for the first time, the day they chose their ship, and the first time they flew together. Each one was wonderful; the familiar warmth filled his abdomen and a burst of joy surrounded his heart. Those were the same memories he was fond of as well.

But the last one quickly killed the feeling.

They were in the ruins again. Maka was examining the carvings along the wall and Soul heard the cyborg proclaiming its blood was black. He watched as his memory self cried out to Maka, flinging his body out protectively so he that it was him who took the hit while she stood back in shock. His blood sprayed out in front of him, flying to coat the floor underneath, the creature in front of him as well as Maka, before he dropped down to his knees and hit the ground face first. Maka followed suit, landing in the pool of blood – his blood – that was flowing along the ground.

The memory wasn't finished, but he forced himself out if it anyway; he was far too afraid of what he was going to witness next. Panting and wild-eyed, Soul stared outside the windshield, watching other students walking in front of the ship completely unaware of what had happened to him. How were they be so calm and carefree when he just witnessed his almost death again? Why did Maka consider  _that_ to be a fond memory? There was nothing happy about your partner being murdered, unless…

"Soul?" her voice was small, but he still heard the fear etched within it and slowly turning toward her only confirmed this. Maka's brows were knitted together and her eyes were sorrowful. He probably looked like a maniac, but who could blame him? "Are you okay?"

He gulped. "Yeah."

"You sure?"

He contemplated his answer for a few seconds as he tried to decide if telling her what he had seen was the best option or not. But what good was going to come out of it if he did? Maka was not the type of person who let something go so easily, especially not when she so clearly blamed herself. All Soul was able to do was help her get over it, but he knew it was hopeless. The ruins were something she needed to get over on her own.

"It was nothing." He started messing with the controls on the panel like he had done so many times before. "Let's get this mission over with, yeah?"

"Yeah," she smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes.

Why did the ruins have to haunt the two of them so much and for different reasons? Why hadn't he stopped her from going in there? Then none of this would have happened.

* * *

He wished Maka was his only concern – but worse were his ever growing problems when it came to the darkness. His fears from the past were slowly resurfacing with each reoccurring nightmare, and he didn't know how to control them anymore. They weren't staying within his mind, and were having an effect on his real life as well.

"Soul?" came Maka's voice.

He looked around the room but wasn't able to find her. He did hear her voice right? Or was it Oni performing a trick on him?

"I know it's you, Oni. Stop playing your fucking mind games."

"Tsk, tsk, Soul." Oni walked out from a dark corner of the room. "You should know by now it isn't me."

"How the fuck am I supposed to know that?" he growled. "You're always-"

"Soul, it isn't a mind game."

Turning around, Soul watched as Maka emerged from her hiding place wearing an outfit he had never seen before. Her hair was bunched up at the side, a grey headband with a silver feather placed on top that matched her corset. The black lines along the corset gave her a more womanly shape, while the translucent feathers showed off a bit of skin. The skirt of her outfit was pure black as it matched the ceiling of the room. It hit just above her knee with feathers adorning the bottom, and a pair of grey boots.

She was stunning… but there was something off about her.

"Maka? Is that really you?"

"Don't you recognize me, Soul?" She took a step closer. "It's me."

"No," he whispered as he stepped back. "You're not Maka… there-there's something different, but I don't…"

"What do you mean?"

He searched her eyes, trying to find any part Maka he was able to recognize. She had the same smile, same emerald eyes, but there was something wrong. He wasn't able to put his finger on it.

He found his answer after a few minutes.

This Maka's eyes were different; the life in them was gone, replaced with a blank, expressionless stare that brought chills up his spine. He looked toward Oni, and the familiar mischievous grin was plastered on his face.

"You're behind this, aren't you? What the fuck did you do to Maka?" he practically yelled.

"Now, Soul," it was Maka who spoke, "why would you think that?" The green of her eyes darkened as her features turned more sinister. His heart pounded in his chest as she slowly walked toward him. "Oni has nothing to do with this, Soul.  _This_ is the real me, and honestly, I've been wanting to tell you this from the moment I first saw you."

He blinked. "Wh-what?"

"You are a worthless, pathetic excuse for a human being. I wish I was never paired off with you. Actually, I could have done a much better job on my own," her voice became more high pitched as she continued. "I should just dump your ass. Maybe I'll go to Lord Death and request a partner change. I wish you had died in the ruins. I wish whatever that creature was had killed you because then I wouldn't be stuck with your lazy ass. You are pitiful, Soul!"

"Why are you doing this?! This isn't you! This is his doing!" Soul pointed toward Oni who was snickering behind his clawed hand.

"The only person to blame is you. If you had never been born, then your family wouldn't be so embarrassed to show their faces in the music industry. They could still appear at functions and be considered royalty, but no, you had to go and fuck it all up with aerodynamics."

"But Wes-"

"Wes only joined Spartoi because you ingrained the thought into his brain, Soul. If you never said anything, he would have become a world renowned violinist, playing in front of millions of people instead of stuck in a job he hates and worrying about his little brother all the time. You know Wes worries if you're going to fall off the train again, right? Go back to your old habits, you know the ones I'm talking about. Admit it, Soul, life would have been better if you'd never existed."

Maka was so close; he felt her hot breath hit his skin. "How do you know that? How do you know any of that?"

"It doesn't matter. What does matter is the bigger truth here. You're a disgrace, Soul; a disgrace to the academy, to your family, and to everyone who has ever known you. Why don't you save us the trouble and end it?"

Soul woke up with a start.

He was gripping his moist bed sheets as his heart pounded against his chest, his breath sporadic. It was the first time he had seen Maka in the room; in the past, it was always Wes who had called him a disgrace to the family, and it made the truth of the words a little less painful. However, tonight it was Maka; when the words came from her, his chest twisted, and his mind began to believe them. When she told him he should kill himself, he felt the evil thoughts from his childhood creeping forward, the same fears he thought were buried slowly coming back to life to haunt him.

Throwing the sheets off his body, Soul climbed out, and pushed the curtains back to make sure no one was awake before quietly making his way outside of the cabin. He reached up to stretch his back muscles, and felt the crisp cool air as it hit his scorching skin.

He made his way to the bathrooms after a few minutes to splash water on his face. As he did so, he avoided his reflection, terrified of what he'd see there if he did. Would he see the monster of his past self or a new monster? Once back in bed, however, Soul found it difficult to sleep - more like he didn't want to sleep in case he had another nightmare or one of his old night terrors.

With his sleep schedule fucked up, his thoughts all over the place, and his fears coming to life in the daytime, he found it harder to interact with the others. He began withdrawing into himself, avoiding everyone, including Maka. He even found himself holding back when they resonated, too afraid his past failures were going to make an appearance.

As he held it all in, it gradually became worse. There were days when he skipped meals because he felt sick to his stomach; even the mere thought of food made him want to throw up, and his headaches were terrible. No amount of medicine was able to cure him. He felt like he was living through hell and knew it was only a matter of time before his carefully constructed house was burned down in the fire.

* * *

She knew something was different about Soul.

Something about the accident had changed him, but she wasn't able to figure out what it was exactly. His behavior wasn't normal, at least not normal for Soul; he wasn't the same shy boy as before. Before the attack, he had started to venture out of his comfort zone, becoming friends with those in their cabin and even initiating more conversations with those around them.

However, after he left the hospital, he gradually closed in on himself again. His memories felt forced when they resonated, like he was trying to force them back or even refusing to go through soul drifting with her. It hurt her to think that he was hiding things from her and trying to prevent their minds from becoming one. Whoever this new Soul was, she didn't like him.

Even his calm, laid back personality was gone.

A few months after the ruins incident, Maka was sitting in their cabin talking to Tsubaki and Black Star about their recent mission when Soul arrived. He didn't pay them any mind as he walked in the direction of his bed, giving off the vibe that he wasn't in the mood to talk. However, while Maka and Tsubaki were aware of his body cues, Black Star was not.

"Fuck, man, you look like shit," Black Star commented.

Maka noticed Soul flinch at their friends' words, but it went unnoticed by the blue haired ninja.

"Maybe ya need to get laid or something. Those dashing looks of yours not working, huh? Guess not seeing as I, the great Black Star am around to attrac-"

"Can you shut the fuck up for five minutes!?" Soul yelled, causing the whole room to go silent.

Everyone's eyes darted between Star and Soul, waiting to see which one would attack first, but Maka's were trained on her partner. His fingers trembled as they curled inward in a gesture similar to strangling someone, his body was far more tense than normal, and his chest slowly rose and fell as he took calming breaths. His face was pale and gaunt due to his lack of food for the past few weeks, and if Maka said wasn't worried about him, she'd be lying.

He swallowed and looked away. "Sorry. I didn't… just forget I said anything."

As he turned toward his bed, Maka pushed herself off hers. "Soul-"

"Not now, Maka. I want to be alone for a while."

"But Soul-"

"Maka!" he yelled as he turned toward her. "I said I wanna be the fuck alone, okay?"

His words were vicious and tore her apart, but she stood her ground and just nodded. "Yeah, okay."

Something crossed his eyes as he stared at her, but he didn't act on as he walked back in the direction of his bed. Maka watched as he kept his back facing her and the others as he straightening out his sheets before climbing on top and shutting the curtains. She wasn't able to grasp the reason behind his sudden outburst toward her and Star. Up until that point, Soul had been like a mountain; completely unwavering at any insult Black Star threw at him, but that day he was different. It was a side of Soul she had never seen before.

There was something wrong, and she was determined to find out what.

Not that determination mattered, really.

No matter how much she tried to pry it out of him, he refused to tell her anything; not even offering him the last cupcake worked like it had done in the past. Soul had become a distant and cold person, and she hated it. He was probably just having one of his moments, she knew that, but she still wanted to help him.

All her attempts to reach out and comfort him were met with resistance and snark and it hurt. Each time he spit out one of those pesky little comments of his or shrug her hand off his shoulder, Maka's heart broke a little more. He was her best friend, and she only wanted to help. Why wasn't he able to see that?

"Tsu, I don't know what to do. I've tried talking to him about it, but he ignores me. I've never seen him act this way. At least, not since we first met him. He's different and I think it has something to do with the ruins. If I didn't force him to go in there, everything would be okay, but I did so it isn't." Maka told her friend on one of the odd days that they had the room to themselves.

Tsubaki soothingly pushed Maka's hair behind her ears, and her voice was gentle when she spoke. "First, you didn't force him into the ruins. Even though a majority of the time he follows what you say, Soul is still the one making his own decisions. Second, maybe he isn't ready to talk about it right now. You need to be patient and let Soul be the one who's ready to talk. Let him come to you. He doesn't like when people pester him, you should know that better than anyone."

Maka sighed. "I know, but… I still worry about him. What if it was you and Black Star that this happened to? You'd be a worry wart about Star just like I am right now."

The dark haired girl nodded and smiled. "It's only natural to worry about your boyfriend like this..." The way she said boyfriend was a tad hesitant, and when Maka looked at Tsubaki, even her smile questioned if she was right.

But it was wrong. They were partners, and would always only  _be_ partners.

"Soul isn't my boyfriend." Maka looked away, feeling the heat as it slowly rose along her cheeks. "H-he doesn't even like me like that, okay?"

She heard Tsubaki hum playfully, probably thinking of teasing her poor friend even more. When Maka turned slightly to look at her, there was a knowing glint in her friend's eyes that made the tips of Maka's ears burn.

Was it really that obvious she liked Soul in that way?

He made her heart thump in her chest like no other boy was able to, and she did catch herself staring at him on occasion while they were alone. It was those exact moments she found herself studying his every move. She loved the way he ran his hand through his hair, making it more of a tousled mess than normal, or the way his crimson eyes became distant as his thoughts wandered away from her, making it impossible for her to read him. Soul was a truly mesmerizing human being, and she may have fallen in love with him over the months they had known each other, but that didn't mean anything… did it?

As she watched her friend, she heard the chatter of the other students drifting through the cracks as they passed the cabin outside. Maka's gut feeling told her it was indeed obvious; that her falling in love with her partner did mean something, and Tsubaki was not an idiot.

Sighing, she closed her eyes and braced herself for the inevitable confession. "Please don't tell him, or anyone else for that matter. I'd rather it  _not_ ruin our partnership."

"I knew it!" Tsubaki squealed and bounced lightly on the bed, clapping her hands over her mouth to hide the grin that was undoubtedly there.

"But I'm definitely not one of those silly little fangirls of his! I have some control over my emotions… and my hormones!"

Tsubaki completely ignored Maka's declaration as she asked, "how long have you liked him?"

"Honestly, it hasn't been that long. I only realized it after the… well after the accident, actually." Maka suddenly became interested in a piece of loose string on the bed sheet underneath them. "But really, Tsu, Soul doesn't see me in that way and he never will. I'll always be the feisty little blonde whose chest size is too small and is far too violent for any decent man to fall in love with."

Tsubaki gently laid a hand on her friend's shoulder, prompting her to look back up. "I wouldn't be too sure about that, Maka. Soul does like you, and even if you don't see it now, I'm sure you will eventually. It'll just take a little more time than usual."

Tsubaki's smile was so gentle and full of hope that Maka trusted her words even more, though deep down in her heart she knew they weren't true.

Giving a cordial nod, she returned Tsu's smile. "I guess we'll see what happens in the future."

However, the next day only proved how right she was in her belief that they weren't meant to be together.

Lord Death had summoned her and Soul into his office in order to give them their assigned locations once they graduated in a few weeks. Her stomach fluttered with scared jitters as her anticipation slowly rose, a wave of nausea washing over her. Maka wasn't entirely sure if she actually wanted to receive her assignment. What if Lord Death had decided to place her somewhere else? Soul was a sure win for Spartoi since he had his brother to resonate with, but she didn't have anyone… save for her father, but she specifically requested they  _not_ be set up as partners once she graduated.

So there stood Soul and Maka side by side, seventeen years old and awaiting their judgment. She felt him blindly reaching out to her before his fingers brushed against hers like she had a sixth sense - or it was possible that her body was aware of the cues from his own. Her anticipation lessened as she held his hand and the wave of nausea died down. As his thumb rubbed soothing circles on the back of her hand, she felt her breathing start to ease up a bit and a comfortable calm washed over her.

Things always seemed to be more pleasant when Soul was around, but she was never able to figure out why – well, she didn't want to admit to herself why.

"Good day, good to see you two again. How are things?" Lord Death asked a few minutes later when he entered his office.

"We're great," Maka answered for the both of them.

"Great to hear. I'm guessing you two are here for your assigned posts once you two graduate, right?" Maka nodded. "Right. Just give me one minute to pull up your files."

Lord Death's huge gloved hands shifted through the files on top of his desk, picking one up occasionally to read the name on top, before finding theirs with a triumphant 'ah', before opening it up. Maka and Soul remained still, the anticipation rising as they stepped closer to each other with each passing second that they had to wait. Soul gently squeezed her hand and Maka glanced over to see his small, reassuring smile; he had the same fear as her. She returned it before her attention was pulled back to Lord Death when he gave a disdainful tsk.

"It appears you two are not in the same Aerodynamics division." Maka's heart dropped. Fear reared its ugly head back into her mind as Soul released her hand.

There was no way that was right. Maka and Soul were perfect together; they were one of the best, most accomplished teams in the academy.

"What do you mean we're separated?" she hissed. "Soul and I are one of the best if not  _the_ best teams here. At least that's what you, Stein, Marie, and all the other teachers have told us this entire time!" Maka cried out, her voice cracking on a few syllables.

But she didn't care. She  _had_ to let her feelings be known  _now_. Lord Death couldn't separate them, especially not during a time when Soul needed her the most.

"I'm sorry, Maka, but Wes specifically asked to be partnered with Soul and considering family members have a higher resonance compatibility than most couples, I chose to accept it. You'll be partnering with someone who is just as good for you as he is, don't worry."

"No! How could you - how could you think I would be better off with someone else? Soul and I have been resonating since the beginning and-"

"Maka, you should have known that the people we assign as your partner are not guaranteed to remain so. I'm sure we told you that in your acceptance letter. Plus, like I had said before, Wes and Soul have a higher compatibility rate than you and him; their combat statistics are also greater so I had to decide which team was more efficient."

Lord Death tried to reason with her, but it fell upon deaf ears. Maka's only thoughts were those of her being away from Soul; away from the person who had come to mean so much to her over the past year, and she couldn't imagine her life without him in it.

Maka opened her mouth to try and defend her case, but was cut off by Soul. "We understand, Lord Death. Maka and I will do our best no matter where we're stationed." Her mouth was agape as she slowly turned to her partner, but he refused to look at her. "We'll just be leaving now. Thank you."

He gave a small bow when Lord Death bid them goodbye and dragged Maka out of the room by her arm; his grip was firm but gentle so as not to leave a bruise there later. Why was he so calm about this? Did he not  _want_ to be her partner once they were done with their training?

Did she do something wrong?...

That's right. The ruins incident. If she hadn't suggested they go in there, he wouldn't have the scar across his chest, and he wouldn't have changed. Soul was probably calm about them not being partners because that meant he had the chance to forget about her, and pretend like she never existed.

That hurt her more than anything. She wanted to cry, or push him away from her to yell at him. It wasn't fair. None of it was fair. Why did she have to fuck everything up?

Soul never let go as he continued leading her away from the main building, not even when they passed their cabin. Instead, he led her to the back where there weren't as many people. He released her arm, and walked a couple more steps before running his hands through his hair and dropping down to his knees.

She didn't do anything. Really, she didn't know what to do except watch in astonishment as he broke down right in front of her. His shoulders shook, and she heard the distinctive sound of him crying as her heart clenched at the sight of him so downtrodden and defeated. Standing there frozen in her spot, she was unsure of what to do or how to comfort him. This was what she had wanted these last few months, right? The opportunity to care for him and show him he wasn't going through this alone, so why wasn't she doing anything? There had to be something for her to do, but what?

He was still hunched over, his face cradled in his hands as he stared at his legs, when she decided what to do. Maka walked over and knelt down beside him. She wrapped her arm around him protectively, an act similar to what a mother did for her distraught child, and that was his trigger.

Soul turned to bury himself in her chest, his head burrowing as far as it could go on her stomach, and he wrapped his arms around her middle, pulling her closer to him. Maka fell to her knees and cradled his head in her arms him – there was no possible way for them to get closer. She felt his anguish as his arms tightened around her, refusing to let her go no matter what, and the clenching in her chest tightened, making her feel like she was suffocating. She felt the dampness through her corset, but she didn't say anything - now wasn't the time to complain about ruined clothes.

Her partner needed her, now more than ever, and she was not going to leave him until he was ready.

No one came to look for them as the time passed by. The people who did pass by never bothered to ask if they needed help, and, honestly, Maka didn't want them to. She loved that they left them alone because she knew Soul was the type of person who didn't want anyone else to know he was having a mental breakdown. He was a private person, and the fact that he waited to have it now, in front of her, meant more than anything. All of her fears of him not wanting to be her partner anymore and hating her disappeared. He did need her, and Tsubaki was right.

She only needed to give him time before he opened up to her again.

Maka moved her hands from the back of his head to the side of his face, pulling it back gently so that she was staring into his eyes. They were a darker red than normal from his crying, and there were two water stains travelling down either of his cheeks. But the tears were gone, and only the small occasional hiccup was left behind. His tiredness was evident in both his eyes and his body.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

The edges of his mouth pulled up slightly as he let out a weak sigh. "I'm sorry, I just-" Soul looked down, contemplating his next words. "It became too much. I don't want to leave you."

That wasn't the only reason behind his breakdown, but she didn't pry any further.

"I don't want to leave you, either, but we have to. There's nothing we can do about it." She paused. "But you know the contract only lasts six years, so maybe I can come back. Then we can be partners again."

Realization flashed in his eyes, and he smiled his first genuine smile in months. "You would really want to still be my partner after what you just saw?"

"Oh, you mean to tell me you aren't a blubbering idiot all the time? I would have never guessed," she teased.

"Shut up."

He lightly hit her arm which only made her giggle. They stayed there for a while longer before untangling themselves from each other, and standing up to go back to their cabin, determined to spend their last few weeks together.

* * *

Soul didn't expect for graduation to come so soon. One minute, he was having a mental breakdown in front of Maka, and the next he was earning his wings. He unfastened the gold buttons on his white jacket, the required attire for all male graduates, and searched the crowd for Maka. She had been with him barely five minutes ago, but once Lord Death announced the students were allowed to leave, she was swept along with everyone as they pushed their way toward their family.

"There you are, little brother," Wes said as he clapped Soul hard on the back. Soul stumbled a bit as he lost his balance, but managed to straighten himself out.

"The fuck, Wes! I almost fell over. Can't you warn me a little before doing that shit?" Soul grumbled.

"But if I did that, you would have known I was coming."

"That's the point."

"If the point is to take out all the fun, then I don't think I like that point."

"You're such a little shit, ya know?"

"It happens when I have you as a brother." Wes looked around at the crowd. "So where's your girlfriend?"

"She's not my girlfriend," Soul interjected, but his brother didn't pay him any mind.

"I have a present for her."

"Why the fuck would you give her a present? You barely even know her."

"It's a thank you gift for tolerating my insufferable little brother for the last year." Wes gave his brother one of his sickeningly charming smiles that made Soul roll his eyes.

"I lost her."

Sighing, Wes said, "I told you not to lose people when you came here. I hope her parents aren't mad at you."

Soul stared at his brother as he tried to figure what he meant. After realizing, he said, "I meant I lost her in the fucking crowd, not on a damn mission."

"Oh, well that changes everything! What does she look like? I'll help you look."

Soul scratched the back of his neck. "She's, uh, a short little thing—"

"I thought she was a person not a thing. They let you soul drift with an  _object_? Wow, they've really changed since I was here."

"A short little  _person_  with blonde pigtails," he growled. "If you see her, she'll be wearing a pair of black goggles on her head."

After a couple minutes, Wes asked, "is that her?"

Soul looked in the direction his older brother pointed, and sure enough, there she was, reluctantly accepting a hug from her overbearing father. "Yeah, that's her." The grin that spread across his face was automatic as him and Wes made their way over to the pair.

"Hey, Maka."

Her face was relieved upon seeing the Evans brother's. "Hey, Soul!"

Spirit released his daughter to give Soul his usual glare, but today it appeared he wasn't going to resort to name calling. "Well, congratulations, Soul. I'm glad to see you graduated. I hope you'll do a great job with Spartoi." His eyes moved from Soul to Wes. "Hello, Wes. Haven't seen you in a while. Hope everything's going good."

"Yep. Missions been good so far, sir." Wes turned to Maka and extended his hand. "Since my brother forgot all of his manners while he was here, I'll have to introduce myself. Wes Evans at your service."

Maka took Wes' hand and introduced herself. As she did so, Soul noted that her eyes kept darting between him and Wes as she tried to determine how it was possible that they were brothers. He didn't blame her. At first glance, they didn't look similar in the slightest. Wes' hair was light blonde rather than white, his eyes were blue rather than red, and his skin was almost as pale as Maka's. The only physical feature that was similar was their bone structure along with their builds, but everything else didn't exactly scream 'brothers' to other people.

"I have something for you, Maka," Wes said as he removed his backpack and started fiddling around inside. Soul saw the surprise etched over her face and smiled. "Here it is."

Wes handed her a small stained glass window that had three flowers, each their own significant color, surrounded by light purple shards of glass. Maka took the gift delicately in her hands, rubbing a finger over the glass and admiring it. She even raised it up to see how well the light hit it. The stained glass window was really well done; Soul thought it might even be his brother's best work yet.

"Thank you," Maka breathed out. "It's really gorgeous."

"You're very welcome. Consider it a gift for handling my brother for the last year." Wes reached over to ruffle his brother's hair, which earned him a menacing glare in the process.

"Don't mention it. He may appear big and bad, but Soul's anything but." Maka gave him one of her sweet smiles that made his heart melt and his stomach do somersaults.

After a while, Wes turned his attention back to Spirit. "I actually wanted to talk to you about something, Spirit. It has to do with the job Spartoi is working on right now."

"Ah, yes, of course." Spirit and Wes walked away from Soul and Maka, speaking in hushed tones as they went.

"So I guess this'll be the last time we see each other until I transfer." Maka's voice was bittersweet when she spoke.

He wasn't ready to say goodbye and neither was she.

"Fuck, I'm not really that great with goodbyes."

"Neither am I," she smiled. "Let's not say goodbye, then. That sounds too formal and official. How about a small bye? I think that fits us better than anything."

"Heh, yeah. I think it does, too. But first…" Soul stepped forward, opening his arms for her to fall into, and they hugged.

Maka's body felt warm pressed against his own, and her heart beat gently against his chest as he laid his head on top of hers. Secretly, he wished they were able to stay like that forever, wrapped up in each other's arms, but he knew it was impossible; they each had their own duties to attend to. Burying his face in her hair, he smelled the sweet scent of vanilla shampoo, and attempted to etch the memory in his mind; he was determined to never forget that comforting smell. "By the way, stop blaming yourself for the scar," he whispered.

"I don't-"

"Yes, you do. I'm at fault too here. I should have told you the ruins were a bad idea." He leaned back to look her in the eyes. "Just stop beating yourself up about it, okay? And don't say you haven't because I know you have. It isn't healthy."

"Neither is keeping your feelings inside and waiting for them to explode," she retorted.

He sighed. "I'll try to stop if you do, deal?"

"Deal."

They remained hugging, until Wes and Spirit returned, and they broke apart. Maka bit her bottom lip as a pink tinge appeared on her cheeks that made Soul smile.

"I'll see you later then."

She looked back up, and returned his smile. "Yeah. See you later. Bye."

"Bye."


	3. My Liars Chair

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> flashbacks are in present tense and marked by ellipses

**Six Years Later**

The waiting room at Shibusen Headquarters was smaller than Maka originally imagined it would be.

The gold walls and copper trim balanced against each other to give a more relaxed feel to the room which reflected the color scheme of Death City itself. Eight chairs were crammed into the room - four on either side - and there was only one door that led back out to where the receptionist was. Maka found it peculiar that there wasn't another door leading to Lord Death's office, but dismissed the thought as quickly as it came to her. Along the walls there were different pictures of past Shibusen employees, and the blonde wondered if her mother and father were featured in any of them or if  _she_ would be featured in any of them in the near future.

Her meeting with Lord Death was the beginning of something far more wonderful than the last six years of her life had been; she felt it in her bones and her soul. She was back in Death City, and nothing could go wrong.

She was home.

When her transfer had been approved a few months ago, she couldn't believe it. A majority of her fellow pilots along with the higher ups loved having her part of their team. She was one of the best pilots and fighters they had seen in years; she had helped to defeat a good handful of their strongest enemies along with dodging enemy fire in the air alongside her partner on countless occasions. Her approval had also marked the day of her six year anniversary of being with the Scythes Aerodynamics team which was only further indication that it was all a dream for her.

In all honesty, Maka would have stayed, but she really did miss home. She missed her friends along with the teachers she had met during her training, but most of all she missed Death City. The location of the Scythes division didn't have the same landscape, nor did it have the same feel; it never felt like  _home_. Even after living there for six years, Maka didn't feel like she belonged there, she always felt more like a tourist rather than a real resident.

But more important than all of those things, she missed-

Her thoughts were disrupted when the door opened, and her attention was drawn to the new arrival. "Maka Albarn?" the receptionist asked. The blonde nodded as she bit back a smartass retort. She was the only one in the room, who else could she possibly be? "If you can follow me, please. Lord Death is ready to see you."

Maka gathered the papers that were spread out on the seat beside her, and placed them back in her small leather messenger bag before following the other woman. The hallway leading to Lord Death's office was different compared to the one at the academy. The color scheme was inverted; rather than the gold trim contrasting with the copper walls, it was the opposite. Rather than pilots from different Aerodynamics divisions, the hallway featured more pictures of Spartoi's various ranking pilots. Maka wanted to investigate the pictures, hoping to catch a glimpse of Soul and his brother, but she failed in her haste to catch up with the longer legged woman.

After turning corners and saying a cordial greeting to a few people, the other woman paused in front of a grand mahogany door. She turned to smile at Maka. "We've arrived. I'll just announce your presence, and then leave." Turning the doorknob, she took a small step inside the room. "Lord Death, Maka Albarn is here to see you."

"Oh, wonderful," came the familiar high pitched voice. "Let her in, let her in."

The receptionist stepped out of the room to allow Maka to enter. Before the blonde was in completely, however, the woman leaned closer to her slightly to whisper, "it's good to have you with us again."

Maka was caught off guard by her words, and side eyed the woman to see if she recognized her. The bubblegum pink hair did spark some recognition in the blonde's mind - how could anyone possibly forget a peculiar hair color like that? - but other than that there was nothing. However, she didn't have time to mull it over as the woman pushed her further into the room, and shut the door behind her.

"It's nice to see you again, Maka. I hope you enjoyed your time with the Scythes."

She smiled. "It's nice to see you, too, Lord Death." Or what was the familiar  _form_ of Lord Death anyways. Was he really a cyborg or a human? The world may never know. "The Scythes were a wonderful Aerodynamics team and Tsugumi was a great partner, but I'm glad to be home."

"I'm glad to hear that. Go ahead and sit down." Lord Death gestured with one oversize gloved hand to the chair in front of his desk, and Maka sat down while he remained standing.

"Now, let's decide where we should place you here at Shibusen." He pushed a button on his desk and a computer screen popped up from the projector inside. "Let's see. We have an opening in Spartoi," her heart jolted at the word, "which is our Aerodynamics team, but you know that already. If you would like to take that job opening, however-"

"Yes!" Maka leaped out of her seat excitedly before composing herself after a few seconds and settling back down. She was not an enthusiastic teenager anymore; she was a grown ass woman and she would behave as such. "Yes, I would love to take that job, but only if Soul will be my partner… if that's okay with Wes, of course."

Lord Death's mask remained stoic, but Maka sensed something wasn't right. "Did you keep in contact with Soul when you left?"

Maka gulped as she feared the worst. "No. Well, we did, but it didn't last past six months. After that I sent him letters bi-weekly, but it was more of a one sided conversation. Why did something happen to him?"

"I see." Lord Death bowed his head a little. "No, Soul is perfectly well. I am, however, sorry to have to be the one to tell you this but Soul is no longer with Spartoi."

Her mouth fell open; to say she was shocked was a pretty accurate way of describing how she felt. "What? Why would Soul… why would he leave? His brother was here! It doesn't make sense. What happened to make him leave?"

"I'm not legally allowed to say what exactly happened, but there was an incident which called for Soul's removal from Spartoi."

"What was the incident?"

"As mentioned before, I cannot legally tell you." His voice was sterner than before and she knew she was pushing her luck by pressing him for more but she didn't care.

"But-"

"No buts Maka." Lord Death's voice became deeper and scarier than normal, and Maka felt herself shrinking in her seat a bit. Chills ran up her spine because she had never heard his voice turn like that; it was gruff and deep, reminding her of a smoker's voice.

When Lord Death spoke next, it was with the same playful tone she was familiar with. "Now, would you like to join Spartoi?"

Maka looked at the ground as she thought it over. If she did join Spartoi, she would have a different partner,  _again_ , which would mean she'd have to learn to resonate with someone all over. The whole reason behind her transfer was because she wanted to work alongside Soul like they did in their youth, but if he wasn't with Spartoi anymore… what could she possibly do about it?

"No," she finally said. "If Soul isn't here then there is no other person I want to team up with. It took Tsugumi and I almost a year to resonate properly, so no. Are there any other job openings?"

Lord Death turned his attention back to the projection and scrolled through the screen once again. "There is a spot open among our secretaries. You'll be doing mostly desk work such as organizing files and making sure reports go where they belong. It can be boring, but it's the only job we have open right now."

"I'll take it." She did need a job to pay for her new apartment, even if it was a secretary one.

"It's very tedious, not at all exciting. Are you sure you wouldn't prefer Spartoi? You'll do wonderful things  _there_ , I'm sure of it. Plus, it will be far more up to your standards than simple desk work."

Maka bit the inside of her cheek to prevent the tears that pricked the back of eyeballs and threatened to fall. She would much rather be in Spartoi, but without Soul there, it was hopeless. She was her best when she was with him because they  _were_ a better team than her mother and father had ever dreamed to be. He was the only person she felt comfortable going through soul drifting with, and she didn't want anyone else.

"I'll take the secretary job."

* * *

A few days passed before Maka made any effort to contact her friends. It was partly because she wanted some time to settle in, but also because she wanted to spend some time alone with her thoughts. As she unpacked her belongings into her new apartment, Maka contemplated every possible reason there was for Soul to leave the academy. Based on his behavior the last time she had seen him, Spartoi had probably become too much for him which led to his departure.

But if that were the truth, then what happened to Wes? Surely the older Evans brother had other choices when it came to partners so he himself wouldn't have left the academy. However, Maka knew it was always Soul he wanted to be with. That was the whole reason her and the boy had been separated after graduation. A small portion of her regretted not asking Lord Death about Wes, but she also had the feeling that if she had, he wouldn't have answered her questions.

Her thoughts about Soul and Wes were washed away by the time she started working at Shibusen. They were replaced with learning how her assigned computer worked, how to correctly file things away, and making sure she put in her best effort every day. The desk job may have been the type of work she didn't want - or wasn't hoping for originally - but she was still determined to give it her all. It was in her nature to do things perfectly and remain committed to her responsibilities, she had been that way ever since she was little.

The job was interesting, though. She was able to see what the other Aerodynamic Pilots were doing without actually  _being_ a part of them because when they had to file a report, they went through her. The only downside was that she found herself jealous of each of them. She really did miss flying the solar ships and exploring the different areas that skirted in and around Death City. Her heart yearned for the adventures from her youth and the time she spent with Soul; it yearned to be up in the air once again.

A part of her wished she could join them, but a much larger part knew she would never do it unless Soul was there with her.

It wasn't until a week of working at Shibusen, Maka finally decided to find out what happened to her partner. Lucky for her, the system she worked with had files on current and past employees so she searched 'Soul Evans', hoping to find his file, and found it was the first one to pop up under the search bar. Clicking on his picture caused a small blue box to slide out to the side. It gave his basic information that was common knowledge already (birthdate, age, etc.), things she didn't much care about. What she did care for was underneath the box. However, where it said 'Spartoi Activity' there was large red lettering that read 'Confidential', and it asked for a password when she clicked on it.

Confused, Maka exited out of the screen, and typed in 'Wes Evans'. If Soul's profile was inaccessible, maybe Wes' would be the opposite. Clicking on the elder Evans' picture, the same blue box slide out to the side with his credentials as well as the same large red lettering under 'Spartoi Activity'; it was the mirror image of Soul's.

Leaning back in her chair, she felt defeated by the stupid system. None of it made sense. Why would their information be confidential? Maka tried forming a logical explanation for it, but nothing came to mind. There was no logical reason for  _both_ of the Evans brother's profiles to be private unless something tragic caused them to leave.

Moving back to the computer after a few minutes, she exited out of the screen, and went back to work - but not before writing down Wes' phone number.

She would find out the reason behind the Evans brothers departure even if it killed her.

Later that night when she arrived home, she called the number she had written down. She listened to the ringing tone as she impatiently tapped her fingers on the table, and waited for someone to answer. It was taking far longer than it should have, and she was close to hanging up when someone picked up the other line.

"Hello?" came a male voice through her speaker.

Maka's heart stopped. She recognized the voice, but it wasn't the one she had been expecting.

"Soul?"

"Uh... yeah. Who is this?"

"It's Maka. I'm back in town." She swallowed the lump that formed in her throat before continuing. "I found your number on the Shibusen database, and decided to give you a call so we could meet up - or something - since you stopped replying to my letters, and all." Nevermind that it was Wes' number she had called, but maybe Soul was living with his brother now.

There was a long pause on the other end of the line before he spoke again. "Yeah, sorry about that. My life sorta became hectic after a certain point."

"I figured." Another pause. "Do you maybe want to meet up, then? Say tomorrow? I really missed you, Soul."

"Tomorrow's not good for me. I have… things to do. How about the day after?" Maka didn't miss the fact that he ignored her last comment.

Nodding, she quickly remembered he couldn't see her face and said, "sounds good. Where do you wanna meet up?"

She heard him sigh before saying, "there's this diner called Deathbucks over near the clock tower, we can meet there. They're pretty decent."

"Alright. I'll meet you there for dinner, say around six?"

"Sounds good."

"Great. I guess I'll see you then."

"Yeah, you, too." Another short pause. "Bye, Maka."

"Bye."

She cursed herself for not talking to him longer as she slammed the small phone on the table. She didn't even ask to speak to Wes nor did she invite him to join them. She breathed out heavily and leaned back in her chair. At least one good thing, came out of the phone call; she was going to meet Soul which meant there would be answers as to why they  _both_ left Shibusen.

* * *

Soul wasn't expecting her to call; he wasn't even expecting her to return to Death City. In all honesty, he hoped he would never see her again. When he stopped replying to her letters, he wanted that to be the last remnant of their relationship. He didn't want to have to explain to  _her_ what had happened to make him leave Spartoi because that would mean he'd have to admit to what he did. Maka wasn't an idiot; she was a smart girl who asked questions so when he heard she was working at Shibusen, his first thought was that  _she knew_. She knew about the incident, and she knew what type of monster he really was.

He took in a deep breath as he sat at the booth farthest away from everyone, trying to calm his nerves. He was being ridiculous with his thoughts and worries. His case was confidential which meant Maka wouldn't know the finer details about the incident; only the higher ups had access to his and Wes's file. There was no possible way Maka would have knowledge about it unless her father gave her the password, but even that thought was idiotic. Spirit may have hated his guts but he wouldn't give his daughter access to something like that.

The whole idea was preposterous.

"Hey, Soul. What can I get for ya today?" asked Patti, one of the waitresses at Deathbucks.

"Uh, nothing right now. I'm waiting for someone."

"Ooooo, is it your girlfriend?"

"No. It's not like that with this person," Soul growled.

"Whatever you say, mister grumpy pants. Then I'll be back when she gets here! Bye, pianoman!" Patti singsonged as she skipped off, her skirts flowing out behind her.

"I told you not to fucking call me that," he mumbled under his breath. She was a sweetheart, but sometimes the girl was such an asshole.

Soul flipped through the menu laying in front of him in order to keep his hands busy while he waited. He had been to the small diner multiple times before, more so on the nights when he had a nightmare or he was haunted by his past mistakes; the dark and secluded booth had long ago been deemed as his own. It was a quiet place, and hardly anyone other than the waitresses really bothered him. The Shibusen employees rarely ever stopped by the place so he was able to escape from the truth if only briefly.

The little bell on top of the door chimed, drawing Soul's attention to it, and his heart practically jumped out of his chest.

Maka still looked like the same girl he had etched into his memory as she stood in the doorway with her ash blonde hair and small physique, but she also looked the way a person who had aged six years should. She no longer wore the pigtails like she had during the academy. Now she wore it down with a few strands pinned away from her face. Her cheekbones were more pronounced, and her jawline was more angular having lost some of her baby fat. Her body also appeared to have taken on a more womanly figure as her waist cinched in to make way for small hips and long legs. Maka was absolutely stunning. A sudden rage of jealousy rushed through him as Soul noticed she drew in a few stares from some of the male guests.

"Maka!" Soul stood up a little to wave her over as well as alert the attention of the men that the pretty blonde was here for him. When she caught sight of him, she smiled before walking over, and sliding in the booth in front of him.

"Hey. Long time no see."  _Lord, was her smile always that intoxicating?_  "How have you been?"

He shrugged. "Same as everyone else, suppose. You?"

"Good." There was a small silence between the two, the conversations around them their only source of noise. "So, what have you been up to all this time?"

"Umm," he rubbed the back of his neck, "nothing much. Just a few odd things here and there, but what about you. Why'd you come back?" He inwardly cursed himself for sounding so rude.

"My job transfer was approved a while ago, and I missed Death City so decided to come back. I wanted to come back home."

"So you with Spartoi now?"

"No, not exactly. Lord Death offered me the job, but I didn't want to take it."

"Why not? Spartoi was always your final goal. At least it was when we were at the academy together."

"I know," she averted her eyes away from his as she nodded. "But that would have meant I'd have to find a new partner… since my original one left."

Soul gulped. She knew, she most definitely knew the reason behind his departure. Even if she didn't, she deserved to know. If Maka were truly the only person he ever really trusted then she also deserved to know the exact events that occurred in her absence. They had spent almost a year learning, memorizing, the others most cherished memories, growing closer to the other every single day. The news about their separation had hit him the hardest and wasn't she the one he had allowed to see him breakdown? Not even Wes had ever seen him like that; Maka was honestly the only person who held his trust still to this day.

He knew all of this deep down in his heart, so why couldn't he tell her?

_Because you're afraid she'll look at you like the monster you are. All the others do already, what makes her different?_ came the voice in his head. It was the same voice that haunted his dreams, the same one that told him to... so long ago.

And it was right.

"Yeah, sorry I didn't tell you about that," He tried to laugh but it sounded fake even to him. He looked away to avoid the pitiful glance he knew was there, but failed as he spared a side glance in her direction. There was no pity in her deep green eyes, but rather confusion. "What?"

"Nothing." She pursed her lips as she studied him for a couple minutes. "It's just, there's something different about you, but I can't put my finger on what exactly."

Soul sat back in his seat and pulled the cool guy act out of his ass like it was second nature for him. "What do you expect after not seeing someone for six years, Maka? People age, ya know."

Maka closed her eyes as she smiled and shook her head.

_Fuck, was she adorable when she did that_ , he thought.

"No, I know that, idiot. I mean there's something different about your aura. But it doesn't matter right now. It'll come to me later." She placed her elbows on the table and crossed her arms as she leaned in toward him. "So, how's your brother?"

It was Soul's turn to look confused. "What?"

"Wes. Your older brother. How is he? Is he still with Spartoi?"

...

Six year old Soul walks toward his older brother with tears in his eyes. The other neighborhood children are cruel to him as usual when he wants to play with them, but he can't for the life of him understand why. He's a kid exactly them, yet they treat him cruelly as if he were an outsider. It has been occurring for weeks now, but he still isn't used to it which is why he always turns to Wes.

Older brothers heal all wounds, as Soul has learned in his short life.

"Soul, what's wrong?" Wes asks.

The older Evans kneels down in front of his brother and pulls the boy's hands away from his eyes. He notes the red brimming around his pupils, his little nose is tinged with a light pink, and his skin is warm as he touches him. Wes hates seeing his brother like this, but, since the day Soul was born, it was bound to happen. It's the whole reason he was graced with an older brother like himself.

"Why don't the other kids like to play with me?" Soul's voice is low, and Wes can hear the small sob that breaks in it which only makes his own heart crumble. "Is it because of how I look?"

Wes gives him a small smile and sighs.

His brother always did have trouble finding new friends and people who would accept him for who he was instead of base their judgements on looks alone. The fact of the matter is that it shouldn't matter that his brother has white hair, shark teeth, and crimson eyes. He's still a person on the inside, a damn good one at that. Anyone would be lucky to call him friend, but that never mattered to the others. Kids were cruel. They tease those who are different - calling them names and poking fun at them - and it always pained Wes to see his little brother hurt over something based on his appearance.

However, he knows how to handle this one. "Your looks have nothing to do with it, little brother. Those kids are only jealous because of who your family is."

"Really?"

"Mhm." Wes rubs a thumb underneath his brother's face to wipe the tears away, and grabs his hand. "Come on, we can go play on our own. We don't need those other kids."

Soul smiles. "Okay."

They walk to the other side of the playground, away from the kids who are sneering at the two, and Wes tries his best to cheer his younger brother up. There may be a six year age difference between the two, but Wes always tries to ignore it. His brother means the world to him, and he wants to make sure he receives the attention he deserves.

It was the only thing the older Evans was able to offer him.

Since the day he was born, Soul was always considered the black sheep of the family. Even from a young age, his interests were more focused on the fundamentals of Aerodynamics rather than his music lessons which peeved their parents to no end. Of course it was understandable. Their parents wanted Soul and Wes to be accomplished musicians like themselves, but Soul's heart was never aimed at pursuing a music career. Wes was the only one in their family who understood his brother's love for the sky.

As Wes pushes Soul on the swing, a solar ship flies above them and draws the attention of the younger Evans. When he swings down, the white haired boy digs his feet in the dirt to stop the momentum, and his attention turns toward the sky as he watches the ship soar overhead. While Soul watches the ship, Wes watches his brother. He sees the curiosity and excitement that crosses over his face, and wonders how deep Soul's love for the air is. The plane disappears and Soul's upturned lips fall.

"You wanna be up there one day," Wes states. He doesn't need to question the boy, he already knows the answer.

Soul looks down as he shuffles his shoes along the ground, trying to think of his answer. "Yeah, sorta, but mother and father wouldn't be happy with me."

Wes smiles. "What if I joined the academy when I become of age?"

This catches Soul's attention, perking up and turning around to smile at him. "Really?" The excitement oozes all over his face and voice, and Wes can't help the warm feeling spreading along his chest cavity.

He nods. "Of course." Lightly punching his brother on the shoulder he adds, "I'd do anything for you, Soul. You should know that by now."

...

Soul swallowed and closed his eyes as the memory was replaced with other, more horrible ones. Shaking his head, he tried to remove them from his mind, wishing nothing more than to forget the awful accident. If time travel were possible, then it would have been him instead of Wes. That was something he would make sure of. He didn't deserve to live on while his brother rested six feet under because of a mistake Soul had made. It wasn't fair, none of it had been fair.

Once the thoughts subsided, Soul opened his eyes again and took a deep breath before telling Maka the devastating news.

His voice was barely above a whisper when he spoke; it was a wonder how she even heard him. "Wes passed away."

Her mouth fell open and a small gasp escaped pass her lips.

"I didn't know. I'm sorry…" Maka chewed on her bottom lip as she bit back the words that were begging to come out, but Soul knew her far too well. She was bound to ask the questions that were burning on the tip of her tongue no matter what.

However, her words told him a story he wasn't expecting.

She didn't know beforehand that Wes had passed away which meant no one at Shibusen told her. Neither Spirit nor Lord Death or any of the others who knew about the accident bothered to let her in on the secret. Maka's image of Soul from their academy days was still intact, and she didn't see him as the monster everyone else thought he was, including himself. For the time being, he was safe when it came to her, but a small part of him wasn't positive how comforting that thought was.

"How did it happen?  _When_ did it happen? Why didn't you tell me?" she finally asked.

Soul blinked, unsure of how to answer. "Um… him and I were out on a mission, and there was… an accident." He paused to take a deep breath. He wasn't sure if he should tell her the exact events that had happened. Looking into those bright green eyes of hers, a small part of him wanted to, but a larger part wasn't ready. Maka was always a nice and caring person who saw the good in others, he didn't want to ruin her view of him.

_Hell, she chose to be friends with me when we were younger, right?_ , he thought.

"I left the academy soon after, and that's the end of it."

Telling her the truth was a risk he wasn't ready to take at the moment.

Maka pursed out her lips as she digested the news. They sat in silence before Patti came back over to take their orders. With it being Maka's first time at the diner, Soul ordered for the two of them and offered to pay which Maka was quick to object to. However, after a few minutes of arguing between them when Patti left, Soul won which left a certain blonde seething in her little corner and pouting at him.

"Aw, why the long face, pigtails?" His teasing words made Maka stick her tongue out at him. "Way to act your age. How old are you again? Twelve?"

"And a half," she smiled.

"I can tell."

After a couple minutes, Maka placed her elbows on the table and laid her chin on top of her cupped hands. Smiling, she asked, "so since you aren't working for Shibusen anymore, what are you doing now? How has life in Death City been since I moved?"

"I, um, started playing the piano again for a few clubs around town. That's basically how I make my money these days. As for life since you left, its been pretty boring. I see Star and Tsu occasionally, along with the others from the academy, but they've been busy with Spartoi business so we rarely have time to talk."

"Can I hear you?"

"Hear me what? I don't go around letting girls hear the noises I make in bed after the first date."

Maka smiled. "Idiot, I meant your music! I've never heard you play and I would really like to. I'm sure you're great."

"I'm not that great, but sure," he nodded. "Maybe we can go to my place after this?"

"Okay." She reached across the table and placed her hands on top of his. A surge of electricity flew up his arm, and he quickly slid his hand away from hers causing the small smile on her face fall somber. "I really did miss you, Soul."

He stared at her, and noticed things he hadn't when she first walked in.

Her bangs were a longer, a few of the strands strands fell in front of her eyes so that they touched her blonde lashes. Every time she blinked, they would flutter out before falling back in place. Even her hair was longer as it fell just above her chest rather than a few inches below her shoulders like when they were younger. Her lips were plumper than before, eyes a more vibrant green, and a few freckles were speckled along her nose and cheeks. She was even more beautiful close up. Soul swallowed a large chunk of saliva that had welled up in his throat as the feelings he thought had vanished long ago slowly resurfaced.

Maybe rekindling their friendship was a bad idea; he shouldn't allow himself get close to her again. He didn't want something similar to Wes' death to happen to Maka, and he certainly didn't want her to find out the truth. If she ever did, she would never speak to him again. Soul wouldn't be able to live with that kind of regret nor live  _without_ her. It was better if they stayed away from each other, never to see the other again.

That's what he should have done.

"I missed you too," he whispered.  _Fuck_ , he thought,  _that wasn't what I meant to say._

* * *

After they ate their dinner and caught up on the last years they had missed, Soul and Maka made their way to his loft which wasn't far from the diner. He didn't live in an extravagant complex like Maka nor in a neighborhood she had expected for him to. Soul's apartment building was located in one of the dingier parts of town behind an abandoned warehouse, and the building was a bit dilapidated. From the outside, Maka couldn't believe anyone would want to live there, especially someone from Soul's background.

Based on what she was able to gather when they were training together, he had grown up in a wealthy neighborhood and his family was well off for several generations. She was only able to guess that he had been exposed to the finer things in life whether it was through his wardrobe or in the cuisine that he ate. Everything was exquisite and far beyond the reach of someone who came from a background like Maka's. Her father was part of Lord Death's council, but that only meant they  _had_ money, not that they were able to spend it on expensive luxuries.

The service elevator was out of order so Soul had to lead Maka up six flights of stairs before they finally reached the floor his apartment was on. There were hardly any lights on in the hallway, and the stench of urine made her nose scrunch up. There were patches of paint on the dark brown walls that was peeling off and there were a few water stains on the carpeted floor. When they finally reached his door, Maka breathed a sigh of relief. The deep mahogany of the door was rich and inviting compared to the others in the hallway, at least from the outside it appeared to be decent.

Soul shyly turned toward her and said, "fair warning, it's not the tidiest of places right now,"

She crossed her arms and raised one delicate brow. "You act like I didn't live with you for a whole year. I know what your idea of clean is,  _Evans_."

"Fair enough,  _Albarn_ ," he mocked.

He pulled the sleeve of his shirt back, and waved his wrist in front of the scanner. A small click later and the door released from the lock to rest behind the archway an inch. Soul pushed it all the way open to reveal a small loft area. Like the hallways, the inside of his apartment was dark and dingy, but there was a lack of urine smell which pleased Maka. As they walked inside, the lights turned on automatically; the pale yellow gave off a mysterious feel to the room but still brightened it enough to show off the surroundings.

The apartment (in reality a loft) itself was one entire room, with only one door - not including the front door - for the washroom. Everything that didn't deal with personal hygiene, was out on display for her to see. His sheets and a few articles of clothing were strewn about on his bed and a variety of pillows were scattered along the headboard. His nightstand was a cluttered mess, personal belongings just thrown on top around the funny looking alarm clock. On the other side, squished into a corner, was a small kitchen and dining area, and next to that area sat a brown couch in front of a television set.

The opposite side facing Maka was composed of yellow tinted windows which followed the slant of the roof above, offering a nice view of the city that loomed outside. Sitting directly in front of it was a small brown keyboard with a matching bench. However, that wasn't the aspect about the loft that drew her attention. That honor was reserved for the stained glass window that was embedded in the middle of the yellow; it was the same one Maka remembered seeing a long time ago through Soul's memories.

"Who made that?" she asked as she pointed to the object in question.

Soul followed her finger and nodded when his eyes fell upon the window. "Wes made it for me. It was a gift for getting into the academy."

"It's really lovely," she breathed out.

She walked forward to see the stained glass window from a closer perspective. It was the same design she had seen years ago; a dark purple dragon encircled a white crescent moon with light blue and yellow stars splattered on a green background. It was a beautiful work of art, and Maka couldn't help but wonder why Wes ever stopped making them. The one he had made for her was currently sitting in front of her bedroom window, and she loved waking up to see all the colors as they danced around her room at sunrise; it was peaceful and wondrous.

A few minutes passed before her attention moved from the window to the piano in front of her. "So this is where you practice your new little hobby?"

Sitting down on the long seat, she delicately traced her fingers along the keys, playing a few chords as she went. They were ancient and a few pieces of the marble were chipped, but the small keyboard was still beautiful. The almost pristine white and black keys against the brown board were almost enchanting; there were different cogs and gears carved into the wood and two small copper pipes jutted out the back. Soul's soft thuds rang in her ear as he walked over, and she felt his body heat warm her skin as he slid in beside her. Her heart started racing as she realized how close they'd be sitting, and her breath hitched when his arm brushed against hers as he reached forward to touch the wood.

"I bought this off some guy at a pawn shop. He wanted about fifty bucks for it so I had to take the opportunity when I could. A piano like this is hard to come by especially at that price. Also recognized this work immediately." He tapped a finger on the board before withdrawing it. "A famous artist from Paris carved that by the name of Justin Law and his work is very nice. She's in bad shape, but she does the job."

Maka gently walked two fingers over a few keys, feeling the cool marble under her touch. "I think she's beautiful."

Soul snorted and stared at her with a small smile. "Yeah, she is."

She turned her head so she could continue talking to him, but stopped halfway.

Neither one had expected to be so close to the other. Staring into his dark crimson eyes, she saw everything; she saw the boy he was long ago, and the one currently sitting beside her all swirled into one. There was pain and misery behind those eyes, but also something else, something that wanted to break through. She wasn't able to pinpoint what it was exactly, but for the moment she didn't care. Instead, she counted the small freckles that dusted across his cheeks and nose, trying to etch each one of them into her mind. She wanted to remember how beautiful he looked when she saw him again for the first time in six years.

Maka's heart beat out of control as she tried to catch her breath.

She drank in everything on his face from the white lashes lining his eyes to the light scar on his cheek that wouldn't have been noticeable otherwise. The beautiful way his nose poked out from his face and the small curve as it connected back; the freckles only enhanced that beauty. His cheeks were still a little chubby, but the hint of cheekbones was there nonetheless.

She continued to scan his face until her focus came to his lips, the pink creating a small fire in the pit of her stomach. She wasn't far. If she moved even an inch, she could kiss him; it would only take one move and the feelings from long ago would resurface for good. They could be together -  _really_ be together - and they wouldn't have to worry about her moving away. There was literally nothing holding her back from moving that one last inch…

Soul cleared his throat, drawing Maka out of her daze, and averting her attention back to his eyes. "Would you like me to write you a song?"

His breath smelled sweet and was warm as it hit her face making her eyes dart back down to his mouth. Closing her eyes, she swallowed as she tried to remove all thoughts of him and those intoxicating lips from her mind. Now wasn't the time to have such lustful thoughts. When she opened them again, she was staring at red instead of pink.

"I would like that."

Soul broke their gaze after a minute and looked back at the piano. "Just give me a while to decide on the right song for you, okay? It takes time and skill to find the right tune for someone like you."

"Someone like me?"

"Yeah, someone who's anal about shit and never shuts the fuck up - ow! Not to mention abusive! The fuck, Maka?" Soul practically leapt out of his chair when she pinched and twisted the skin on his arm.

"You were being rude," she said.

"Wouldn't have to be if you weren't such a damn prude."

"I am not a prude."

"Yes you are. All you did back at the academy was read alone on your bed."

"That doesn't make me a prude." Maka smoothed out her skirt before continuing. "Just that I know how to spend my spare time productively rather than planning extravagant pranks with my best friend."

"Hey," he snapped. "That was productive work."

"Whatever you say, Eater."

"God I was a real idiot back then wasn't I?" He threaded his fingers through his hair as he gave her a side glance.

"Yes you really were. Who chooses Eater as their own middle name anyways?"

"I thought it was cool."

Maka snorted. "Right. I forgot I was talking to Mr. Cool himself. The same person who thought it was a smart idea to wear his own personalized goggles all the time."

"Fuck I almost forgot about that. What the hell was I thinking back then?"

"I don't think anyone likes to remember what their younger selves did. Makes for some cringe-worthy memories."

"Don't I know it."

There was a moment of silence as both escaped to their own separate thoughts, and Maka's mind trailed back to a question she had earlier. "I've been meaning to ask, what happened to Grigori?"

Soul looked at her and blinked. "They didn't tell you?" She shook her head. "Thought Lord Death would have told you more than he did. Grigori's still mine, Wes and I bought her once I joined Spartoi, but since I'm no longer part of the Aerodynamics division, she's currently in storage. Never to be flown again." A short pause. "Why? Did you wanna fly her?"

"No. Well, kind of. I do miss flying in her."

"Then why didn't you take the Spartoi job?"

"Because it would have been useless without my right hand man next to me. There's no one like my original partner, you know?" She bumped her shoulder against his to emphasize her point. "Like I said, I really did miss you. I missed flying alongside you, as well as these little moments here."

He smiled weakly at her. "Missed you too. Flying with Wes wasn't exactly… the  _best_. I knew too much about his life beforehand. Yours was definitely more exciting."

"Yeah, I heard resonating with a family member was always more difficult because of that, but I'm not entirely too sure about it. I only resonated with Papa once, and never had the desire to do it again after that."

Soul knitted his eyebrows together. "When'd you do that?"

"It was the day at the ruins when the… um, well you know." Maka bit her lower lip and stared at the building across from his. She watched the small airships flying lazily across the sky some distance away and only vaguely wondered when Death City put them in. She had only heard about them before, but never saw one in the city. They were always meant for other, more populated cities rather than a medium size place like Death City.

Soul's tone was somber when he spoke next. "Yeah, I remember."

Maka could only guess he was thinking back to the day of the accident and a sharp pang shot through her chest. Bringing up the ruins was a bad idea, she always found a way to fuck things up somehow and she hated it. If only she was able to learn to keep her mouth shut or at least think before she spoke so she wouldn't ruin the moment with her big mouth. Soul was right, she was a nerd who had a big mouth; a big mouth that always found trouble.

After a few minutes of silence, Soul asked, "How far do you live from here?" His voice drew her out of the stupor she was in, and she focused her attention back to him.

"Hm?"

"I asked how far do you live from here because it's almost sun down," he nodded outside the window to indicate what he meant.

She checked the time on her holo watch. "Right, I should be getting back. I'm actually on the other side of town so I guess I can just take the bus or - what are you doing?"

He slid off the bench and walked over to his nightstand, ignoring her unanswered question as he went. She watched as he slipped into his leather jacket that was draped on one of the bedposts and picked up something silver out of a small glass bowl sitting on the stand beside it. "I'm taking you home. It's dangerous walking in this neighborhood at night."

"Soul, you really don't have to. I can take care of myself."

"I know." He threw one of his infamous smirks over his shoulder that caused her warm liquid to flow through her stomach. "It's not your safety I'm worried about. I'd rather not have to read in the paper tomorrow that a short blonde woman kicked ten guy's asses in the middle of the night."

Maka laughed and slid off the bench to follow him back outside into the hallway. He led her to what appeared to be a parking garage that was connected to the building, where a gaudy orange motorcycle was parked in. The wheels were larger compared to those on a normal motorcycle, exhaust pipes protruded from the rear, and there was a single headlight with shutters on it. He sat down and patted the back of the black seat for Maka to sit down before placing the key in the keyhole to rev the bike to life.

The ride to her apartment was smooth as she clinged to his jacket, giving him directions to her place. His body heat kept her warm against the cool night air as they zoomed past buildings and people causing them all to blur as they went. It was exhilarating and reminded her of the days when they flew together as the wind whipped through her hair. Blonde strands of hair flew behind her as they made a particularly sharp and she had to tighten her grip on him.

Being that close to him caused more electricity to surge through her body, and she felt every muscle of his back move as he steered the bike around each corner and obstacle in their way. The smell of leather was strong along with his shampoo. They mixed together and wafted up her nose, making her wish the night could last forever so that she was able to stay on the bike longer with him.

Unfortunately, it all had to come to an end.

Once they reached her apartment building, Maka dismounted the bike and bid Soul good night before walked up the stairs to her home. Thoughts of Soul and the day she spent with him slowly lulled her to sleep, and she remembered that she still didn't learn the exact reason behind his departure from Spartoi. She knew it was because of Wes, but exactly what happened to him? What was so traumatic that it would make Soul quit?

The last thing she remembered was the way Soul looked when they first met seven years ago, and the youthful glow that covered his face. Compared to the man she knew now, that glow had long been extinguished and it broke her heart. The Soul she knew now was still the same boy, but something had changed him.

She only wished she knew what it was.

* * *

As Soul laid on his bed, he watched the lights from the outside world dance along the ceiling.

He wasn't sure why he had brought her back to his apartment, or why they had to be that close when they were at his piano. Seeing her like that was breathtaking, and he wanted nothing more than to kiss her. Her cheeks and nose were peppered with small freckles and the blonde lashes that feathered out around her eyes only enhanced their vibrant color. Maka Albarn was beautiful and six years had done her well. She was like fine wine, it grew better with age.

He rolled over to stare across the room into the dark abyss, and wondered what sorts of monsters would visit him that night.

Soul wanted to laugh at how ridiculous it was that he still had nightmares even after six years, but every one of his attempts to rid himself of them was futile. He tried sleeping pills along with every trick in the book he could find, but nothing worked. His nightmares only grew stronger, and the more he fought against them, the harder they fought back. Some nights he found sleep hard to come by, and would stay awake to listen to the noises on the street - listening to every argument and word that drifted up to him. They were somewhat soothing, but they never helped him sleep.

As he closed his eyes, he hoped tonight would be different.

However, hope was such a fleeting thing when it came to Soul.

The nightmare that night was the same one he had right after the incident with his brother.

It was the day of the ruins when he and Maka entered the area without permission. The cyborg was there and everything played out like normal, but then it changed. Soul didn't run out to save Maka; instead he stood back and watched as the cyborg sliced  _her_ across the chest causing  _her_ blood to spew out. He watched her crippled body hit the floor, her haunting green eyes looking up at him, and her mouth formed the simple word 'why' before all life was wiped away from her. The small glimmer of hope in her eyes was the last thing to disappear and all that was left was a simple shell that used to be Maka.

Soul woke up with a start; his heart pounded against his chest, and his breathing was heavier than normal. Placing his head in his hands, he tried to ease his breathing with the technique his shrink, Kid, had taught him.

Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out.

It was fifteen minutes or so before his heart finally slowed down, and his breathing was back to normal. He swung his legs over the bed before standing up and walking to the bathroom where he splashed water on his face. The cold moisture was welcoming against his burning skin and helped him wake up quicker. He stood over the sink, waiting for the wave of nausea to subside before opening his eyes to stare at himself in the mirror.

He should have been surprised by the nightmare, but he wasn't. There had been countless nights where the same dream occurred, each one more sinister than the next.

Seeing Maka die before him wasn't the part that left him shaking. However, not even that was the most hellish aspect about the dream. The most horrible and sickening part of it was that he enjoyed watching the life leave Maka. He enjoyed seeing her last breath escape her body, and the blood pooling around her.

He enjoyed every minute of it, and that's what scared him the most.


	4. The Truth of Forgiveness

Something drew Maka closer to Soul after their first meeting, but she wasn't completely sure what it was. In the days and weeks that had followed, she found herself spending most of her time with the man and never bothered with trying to contact any of her other friends. From an outside perspective, her relationship with him might have appeared to be unhealthy, but it was anything but that. She had really missed Soul and found rekindling their friendship was more important than the others she had. There was also a secret the white haired man was keeping from her, one that she wanted to learn about.

Hurt and pain resided behind his crimson eyes and she desperately wanted to know why; she wanted to learn all of the secrets he kept locked away in his heart and the thoughts that roamed around his mind. She was fully aware that Soul was a private person - had always been that way - but she still felt betrayed that he didn't trust her enough to talk to her. Her heart also broke at the thought that he had returned to his reclusive state when she was transferred after she had hoped he moved past it during their time at the academy.

Sighing, Maka lightly shook the thoughts of Soul and his weird behavior from her mind. She had work that needed to be done, and wondering about the inner workings of a man that was miles away was not one of them. There were requests flying in from each of the individual Spartoi teams that needed to be prioritized. Each of them appeared to be in dire situations all around the outskirts of Death City, and a small portion of Maka wondered what they were experiencing. What type of dire situation were they in that would call for backup? Or an entire hospital's supply?

"Maka," came a bored voice as her attention was drawn away from the monitor and her thoughts. "Can you take these case files to Lord Death's office? I'd do it, but Kim's forcing me to train one of the newbies."

"Sure, it's no problem." She smiled up at the tall blonde by the name of Liz Thompson. There wasn't much she knew about the girl in the short time they worked together, but she appeared to be a kind person. The only thing she did know was the fact that Patti the waitress was her younger sister and they lived in a small apartment complex on the other side of town. Rumor around the office was that their old friend Kid was the one who paid it off for them since it was located in one of the richer neighborhoods, but it was only a rumor.

"Thanks." Liz said as she gave her a small smile.

"Oh, Liz!" Kim called from across the office, and Maka watched as the older blonde visibly flinched at the playful tone. "I have our new employee here who is just dying to be trained by you!"

"One of these days I'm going to murder that woman," Liz muttered to Maka.

She removed the files from Liz's hands and gently placed them on her desk before giving a small shrug. "And if you do I won't testify against you. That way your sentence isn't too long."

Liz smiled. "Thanks, Maka. You are a lifesaver."

Watching the woman walk toward Kim and a dazed brunette, Maka silently giggled to herself. Her co-workers were definitely a fun group of people and were not like the other girls she knew at the academy. Back then, they all appeared to have an air of sophistication and maturity that was years beyond them, but the women she was slowly getting to know now, while mature, were also a playful bunch.

Maka finished sorting through a few more reports she had on her list before picking up the files from Liz off her desk. The stack itself was pretty heavy and large in comparison to the files from the past, and Maka guessed that they must have been from the older blonde's own sorting adventure. The weight of the files didn't matter, though, because Lord Death's office was only down a few hallways, but she was still uncomfortable with the matter. The reason behind her discomfort was the small fear that someone she knew would see her. While she was fine admitting that she didn't join Spartoi to Soul, everyone else from the academy was a different story.

Everyone knew she was the best in their year and that she was a perfect candidate for Spartoi. Not taking the job offer was an embarrassment not only to herself, but among her old classmates as well. They may have been taught techniques on how to perfect their combat skills, but the guilt tripping came naturally.

"Kilik, do you have a status update on the ruins situation?"

She stopped just before turning the corner at the sound of her father's voice, but that wasn't what had caught her attention. Her ears had perked up at the mention of ruins because there only one he could possibly mean; the ruins her and Soul had encountered the humanoid cyborg at. The same one that was the cause of so much turmoil and the small drift between Soul and the person he was before. The mere thought of that day and the events that followed made her uncomfortable.

"We still haven't been able to find the cyborg that was mentioned in Albarn and Evans' report, but there is something else you need to know, sir."

Maka closed her eyes and swallowed down the lump in her throat as the cyborg slashing Soul across the chest flashed in her mind; she witnessed his blood splattering along the ruin floor, her shoes, and the cyborg's body, before the young boy fell limp to the ground. The memory left a grotesque taste in her mouth and her stomach churned as she tried to forget it.

But how could she possibly forget something like that? It had left her partner weak, helpless, and was the cause of his downward spiral.

She opened her eyes and pinned herself to the wall. Whatever information Kilik had for Spirit, she wanted to know too, which meant she had to be absolutely quiet.

"And what exactly would that be?" Spirit asked.

She heard Kilik shuffling through some papers that she could only assume was his status report. "When Ox and Harvar exited the ruins before us, they saw two figures coming from the direction of the town that was nearby. The two figures attacked, and Ox and Harvar tried to talk some sense into them, but they wouldn't stop."

"What happened then?"

"Ox and Harvar shot the two figures, but the strangest thing is that the figures appeared to be human. Harv told me that there was some sort of dark substance surrounding their bodies and when they spoke it wasn't in a language he understood. Ox said it appeared to him like they were being possessed. Neither one is sure they'll be joining us for future missions. The whole ordeal really rattled their nerves, sir."

A moment of silence passed as Spirit digested the news Kilik gave him.

"I see," he finally said. "I want you to take this report directly to Lord Death himself; this information is to remain top secret, is that understood?" A pause for Kilik to nod his understanding. "Relay the same information to your crew. I don't want any of this to get out to the other Spartoi team members. It's on a need to know basis only. If Ox and Harvar do decide they don't want to be on the ruins team anymore, tell them to contact me. I'll be sure to place them somewhere else."

"Yes, sir."

Maka heard the scuffing of Kilik's boots as he turned to walk in the direction of Lord Death's office and she knew she had to make a decision quickly. Her father was either going to follow him or walk in her direction, with it most likely being the latter. Taking a deep breath, she turned the corner - pretending she had been walking down the hall moments before - when she bumped right into her father. He placed his hands on her shoulders to prevent her from falling, but his smile turned to shock when Spirit caught a glimpse of her face.

"Maka. I didn't know you were back."

A few weeks had passed since she moved back home yet she still refused to contact the man between that time. It might have been childish for her to still hold on to the grudge from when she was younger, but it still burned bright in her heart. Forgiving someone for cheating on his wife, no matter how many times he claimed he loved the woman, was hard; especially when their own daughter had been hurt in the process.

It had been well over ten years since her parent's divorce and the actions of her father did appear to be petty now, but, in truth, their relationship had always been strained. She had realized that during her time with the Scythes. When she moved back to Death City, telling the man about her arrival had been the last thing on her mind. There were too many years of pent up anger that their relationship was beyond repair at this point.

However, the guilt still rose inside her as she chewed on her bottom lip. She really should have tried to be a better daughter to him. The worst he had ever done to her was love her too much, and he wasn't the one who left the country, either.

"It was nothing personal, I didn't tell anyone that I was moving back. It was more on a whim than anything."

It was a lie but he didn't need to know that, and she certainly didn't need her guilt to worsen.

He slowly nodded his head. "I see. Well, I'm glad you're back. Maybe we can have lunch sometime? That is, when you aren't busy with work."

"I'd like that."

The pain that flashed in his blue eyes didn't go unnoticed by her as the guilt slowly swelled up into a lump in her chest, crushing her heart in the process. He didn't deserve to be treated so unfairly and she was a terrible daughter for being the cause of it. If she was able to find it in her heart to forgive and accept him for the person he was, they wouldn't be in this situation now. She lowly sighed as her hand twitched to reach out to him, but Spirit placed his hand on her shoulder before she was able to. The gesture was the same one he had performed when she received her acceptance letter from the academy and tears stung the back of her eyes.

"You do your father proud, okay?"

Her throat felt heavier, and she wanted to apologize for everything - her behavior for the last ten years, for never forgiving him for her cheating on her mother, and telling him how much she loved him - but the words didn't come out. They stayed wedged in her throat and in her mind as she gave him a small nod.

The pressure of Spirit's hand was missed as soon as he removed it from her shoulder, and she remained stationary as she listened to the soft thud of his boots as he walked away. Slowly, she turned her watery gaze to the floor and silently cried. Her mind yelled at her for being ridiculous, that the older man knew she loved him even though she never acted like she did. Spirit was the type of man who was aware of his faults and understood the reasons why she resented him. There was nothing for her to be guilty about.

However, the pain in her heart was real, and the tears staining the granite floor were too.

* * *

As Maka laid in bed that night, she tried to excuse her actions and feelings for her father, but all of her attempts were futile. No matter what she told herself, the guilt refused to be erased as it built up in her heart. It felt like someone had wrapped their hand around the pulsating muscle and was squeezing out all of the emotions within it.

It pained her to admit it, but she was a terrible person.

It was her fault that Soul had been slashed across his chest, and her mind was too stubborn to forgive her father. She was a heartless, selfish person who only cared about herself. The people around her never really mattered, she was always looking out solely for Maka Albarn. A girl who resented her father because of something that happened a long time ago didn't deserve happiness. She deserved to be dropped in the deepest part of the ocean where she would rot for all of eternity and suffer through the nine circles of hell after death.

It was a punishment fit for a person like her.

Maka rolled back over and tried to clear her head. Rather than thinking of Spirit, she thought of Soul. The memory of them sitting in front of his piano floated to the front of her mind causing the core of her chest to heat up and slowly spread throughout her body. A small smile spread across her face as she berated herself for not seizing her opportunity and kissing the man. Slowly she wondered what his lips would have tasted like if she had; they were probably like something soft and sweet, like cotton candy. The probably would have melted in her mouth as soon as they touched, causing her insides to soften and her heart to flutter.

Maybe next time they met, she'd find out

* * *

Soul found himself sitting in the same diner once again, waiting for Maka to arrive. His mind was buzzing with thoughts of what the day would bring, but he was also plagued with doubts.

The nightmare from a few weeks ago was still haunting him. The pleasure from watching the small blonde die in front him still lingered in the back of his mind and there wasn't a single moment he was awake where it didn't torment him. Why he still agreed to meet with her was beyond him. It also didn't help that the darkness was seeping its way back into his thoughts and dreams, reminding him of what he was capable and of what he truly was beneath his flesh.

If he were to ever physically hurt Maka - or worse killed her - he wasn't sure what he would do.

He wasn't sure if he would be able to live with  _that_ blood on his hands.

Soul released the breath he had been holding in and gently placed his head in his hands as he willed his headache to go away. He had been taking the prescribed medicine for them since they started a few weeks ago but it didn't seem to work. The door chimed a few minutes later to announce a new customer, but his head was throbbing too much that he didn't bother to see if it was Maka or not. A small light flickered on in the back of his mind that alerted him to her presence, but he didn't pay it any attention. Deep down, he hoped the light was wrong this time.

"Hey, Soul!" came Maka's cheery voice.

Panic rushed through his body as he was startled by the unexpected noise and he bolted straight out of his seat, scraping the chair along the floor. Maka softly placed her hand on his shoulder and gave a light squeeze to calm him down. It was done in a similar fashion like when they were younger. "You okay?"

Wild eyes looked up at her as he willed his rapidly beating heart to slow down before answering. "Yeah. I'm fine. Just wasn't expecting you to come so soon."

Maka nodded as she sat down in the chair across from him. He opened his mouth to say something, but yellow hair flashed in the corner of his eye, drawing his attention to a newcomer.

"Hey, you two lovebirds. What can I get for ya today?" Patti asked as she whipped out a small notepad from her front apron.

He was about to correct her when Maka spoke first. "May I get a coffee with three creams and two sugars? Also, a slice of banana nut bread if you have any, please."

"I'll take a coffee too, but black. Nothing sweet for me." Soul decided  _against_  correcting the waitress since  _his date_ chose not to.

"Alllright," Patti said as she finished scribbling on the notepad. "I'll have that out in a jiffy! Don't you two do anything I wouldn't do!" She winked before dashing off to the kitchen.

"And make it the strongest cup of coffee you have, Patti!" Soul yelled after her.

He breathed out heavily and stretched out in his seat as he tried to pop his back. It had been another restless week for him and his body was paying for it. His muscles ached and he was sore everywhere, especially in places he didn't know existed. The voice in the back of his mind constantly reminded him that he needed to go see a doctor or at least contact Kid about it, but he always ignored it. It was embarrassing enough that he saw a psychologist for five years after Wes' death and if Maka found out, he would be downright humiliated. He also didn't want her to bombard him with questions that he wasn't ready to answer.

Questions that stirred too many bad feelings and memories within him.

When he turned back to Maka, her eyebrows were scrunched together in confusion. "What? Did I do something wrong?"

"No. Just… how often do you come here?" she asked before closing her eyes and shaking her head a bit. "That sounded accusatory. I only asked because you seem to know the waitress really well. You two seem to be old friends."

She really was observant. "Mhm. I come here all the time when I've had a hard night or can't sleep so I've come to know Patti very well. She's always working when I come here too."

"What do you mean you can't sleep?"

"It's mostly because of the-"

"Maka!?" came a shrill voice near the door.

The pair turned to see who the person that interrupted them was and saw Tsubaki standing at the front of the diner gaping their way. She zigzagged her way through the other customer's tables in order to reach their own, being careful not to ruin her skirts as she went.

"Hey, Tsu!" Maka stood up to hug the dark haired girl. "It's been so long! Your hair's gotten longer and… I'm so sorry I didn't tell you I was coming back, or that I  _was_ back. I've been busy these last few weeks."

Tsubaki and Maka broke apart before sitting down in the chairs beside them.

"You've changed so much!" Tsubaki said. "Six years really did a good job on you. You look so mature and beautiful and - oh Maka it's so great to see you again. I missed you so much."

"I missed you, too. And everyone else. It's really great to be back."

Soul didn't miss the glance she threw him when she said 'everyone'. However, his nerves were on edge because when the stars came out, the night sky was never far behind…

The door banged open, drawing all the customers and waitresses attention toward the front of the diner where a man with light blue dreads mixed in with mechanical contraptions walked in. Upon seeing his old friend, Soul's heart dropped down to his stomach. It had been about five years since he last saw the man - not since his departure from Shibusen and Spartoi - and their final goodbye hadn't been said on the best of terms.

"Yo, peasants! Bow down to your god!" Black Star boomed, his voice ricocheting off the walls around them.

He scanned the patrons around him as he searched for one person in particular. When his eyes fell upon Tsubaki and who she was sitting with, they bulged. In a blink of an eye, he dashed over toward their small table and leaned on it, causing it to tilt slightly. "Maka! You're back!? When did this happen!? Why did this happen!? Your god demands answers! Why have you not told your god  _anything_!?"

Maka and Tsubaki giggled behind their hands at Star's antics before the former spoke. "Well, hello to you, too."

"Yeah, yeah, skip the pleasantries, Maka. I wanna know what the fuck you're doing here because it sure as hell has nothing to do with joining Spartoi."

Once again, Soul caught Maka's quick glance toward him. "That was my first intention, but then plans changed. I still work at Shibusen, just not in the Aerodynamics division."

"And why the hell not?"

"Because it didn't sit right with me. I would have needed to find a new partner."

Star nodded. "Eh, I gotcha. Finding a partner is always difficult. That's why I'm glad I have Tsu here as mine. Couldn't have been paired with anyone else!" He pushed off the table and crossed his arms as he puffed out his chest. "No one can ever handle the great Black Star like Tsu can!"

"That doesn't surprise me," Maka smiled.

The man dropped his arms along with the god act and smiled at her. "Doesn't matter if you're with Spartoi or not, I'm glad I have one of my best friends back. Now we can show Death City what it really means to raise hell."

Maka placed her hand over her face and groaned. "I should have listened to Mama and stayed away from you when I still had the chance. You're a really bad influence on me."

"A god can never be a bad influence on his people."

"Or  _her_ people," Tsubaki chimed in.

As if remembering something important, Maka's head popped back up and turned to Soul. "But I would join Spartoi again if a certain  _someone_ were to do it with me."

All eyes were drawn toward the white haired man causing him to slump down further in his chair.

He glanced everywhere in the restaurant except toward the people watching him, but Soul's eyes began to wander back after a few minutes. The first person was Tsubaki whose facial expression was a mixture of sorrow and anger all rolled in one. The pit of his stomach squirmed with uneasiness under her indigo gaze until she finally averted her gaze down to the table. Taking the hint, Soul looked toward Maka but noticed her emerald eyes weren't trained on him and were instead they were focused on Black Star. Reluctantly, that was where his attention turned.

But he regretted it immediately.

Throughout the entire exchange, Black Star had never noticed that Soul was sitting at the table, and when he finally did, the merriment evaporated from his face. In its place rested resentment, and hatred scorched through his dull green eyes that Soul felt the invisible daggers being pierced into him. When it came to Star and his relationships with people, he was either overly protective of them to the point where he would be willing to lay down his life for them - no questions asked - or he was capable of hating them beyond eternity without any hope of reconciliation.

When it came to Soul, it was always the latter but with good reason.

Remembering where he was, Star schooled his expression into a more neutral, blank one even though his anger still seeped through by the terse tone in his voice. "Hey, Soul. It's been a while."

"Yeah," he breathed out.

An awkward silence fell around the table as the two men stared at each other, waiting to see what the other would do. Tsubaki kept a watchful eye on Black Star while Maka's eyes darted between the two, trying to decipher what was going on. Soul should tell her, he  _knew_ he should, but how exactly was he supposed to tell the woman he hadn't seen in six years that he tried to murder his friend once?

As if on cue, Patti returned to the table. Her cheery disposition placed a standstill on the silence as she placed Soul and Maka's order on the table. "Here you are, lovebirds! A slice of banana nut bread plus a coffee with three creams and two sugars for the lovely lady. And, the strongest cup of coffee we got for Mr. Grumpy Face over here."

The waitress glanced between the two new occupants at the table and smiled. "Can I get you two anything?"

From the corner of his eye, Soul saw Star quickly gaze over him before sitting down in the empty chair next to him. "I'll take a glass of milk."

"And give me a slice of pie with a cup of coffee, please." Tsubaki returned Patti's smile before quickly adding, "oh, and I'll take two sugars and a cream with it."

"Alright-y. I'll be out with that in a jiffy!" And then Patti was gone, leaving the four back to the awkward silence from before.

The close proximity between him and Star made him feel like he was suffocating, like he was a caged animal with nowhere to run or hide. He was being forced to face Black Star head on. Facing his inner demons and admitting to what he had done years ago were things he wasn't ready for yet. Hiding the truth about what had happened to Wes from Maka was proving to be difficult as time went on, and her finding out what he had done to Black Star was at the bottom of his list.

Rather than facing the truth, he listened to the three people sitting around him as they reminisced on what had happened in the years they had missed. He watched the blonde's eyes light up with excitement when the dark haired women told her something; how the small laughter lines at the corner of her eyes scrunched up or the way her cheeks puffed out as she laughed. It caused the pit of his stomach to burn with want and his eyes never left her, almost like he was in a trance.

Without warning, Maka's body splayed out across the ruins floor in a warm pool of her own blood flashed in his mind, and his fingers twitched with the desire to leap across the table and kill her. He swallowed it down as he forced his mind to think of other things rather that memory and suppressed his urge by picking at the skin around his nails. Being with Maka Albarn was proving to be like treading in dangerous waters and he needed to be more careful.

All it would take was one slip up.

One accidental slice to her throat and she would be gone.

* * *

About two hours later, the four companions left the diner. Both pairs said their goodbyes - Maka exchanging contact information with Tsu and Star in the process - before going their separate ways.

Soul and Maka walked aimlessly down the street in a comfortable silence as their boots thumped along the cobblestone. Occasionally, Soul's hand briefly brushed against Maka's as their arms swung next to each other with every step they took. The tingling feeling he had felt only a few nights ago shot up his arm each time her flesh touched his. He both loved and hated it. He hated it because he didn't trust the monster inside of him to remain under control until he arrived to his apartment, but he loved it because every fiber in his body was telling him that they were right.

But it was dangerous;  _he_  was dangerous.

Suggesting that they go their separate ways was very tempting, but a part of him wasn't ready for it yet. For the time being, Maka was the only good thing in his life and he wanted to treasure every moment he had with her for however long he was able to. It was only a matter of time before she found out the truth about the accident and she ended their friendship. Only then would her view of him change. She would see exactly what everyone else saw when they looked at him - a demon - and once again, he would be alone.

"So Tsu and Star are engaged. That's insane, right?" Maka asked as she broke the silence between them.

Soul turned his head slightly to look down at her, one white brow arched up. "What?"

"Tsu and Star getting married next year. Weren't you paying attention just now?"

"To be honest, not really. I sorta zoned out there for a while."

She smiled. "Well, they are. It seems pretty crazy considering how young we still are, right?"

He shrugged. "Eh, I wouldn't say that. They have known each other for most of their life so it isn't really that much of a surprise. Plus they do say couples who drift together all the time have a greater compatibility than those who don't."

"You think we have a good compatibility?"

"Uh, well…" he trailed off as he tried to think of an answer.

He was aware of what he wanted to say, but at the same time he wasn't sure if it was the right thing to say. They weren't even a couple; they had only soul drifted for a whole year while they were at the academy. He did know her better than anyone else he had met at his time in the academy, but did that really mean they were compatible? Glancing down, her bright green eyes were focused on him, waiting for his answer. Gulping, said fuck it and gave it to her.

"Well, sure. We do know each other better than anyone else - we know the others deepest, darkest secrets - so yeah I'd say we are."

"Even though we aren't a couple?" she pried.

"Yeah, even though we aren't a couple," he whispered.

His cheeks burned as he stared at the clock tower as it loomed over the city. The architecture of the tower was similar to the grandfather clock in his parent's home as the black pipes for the steam jutted out of the gold-trimmed maroon base. Large golden cogs peeked out of the clock's face as the ticking black hands pointed to roman numerals. In place of a moon dial, there were carvings of a skull and two scythes on the wood which represented Shibusen itself. It was the center focal point of the city; for everyone else, it was a symbol of honor and great fortitude, but to him it only meant disgrace and cowardice.

It was the last place him and Wes had visited before their final mission, before his brother's demise.

Pausing to stare up at it, a thought occurred to Soul and he knew the exact place he wanted to take her.

"Have you ever been to the edge of town before?" His question must have caught her off guard because she slowed her walking to stare at him.

"What do you mean?"

"Have you ever been to the docks on the other side of town before? If you haven't, I was wondering if you would like to. It's a really nice view, different from all the smog that's around this area."

Maka licked her lips and stared at the ground, and Soul's heartbeat started to pick up as he waited for her answer. He found a part of himself hoping that she would decline his offer and give him a half true excuse for why she had to go back home, like she left the oven on or had to wash her hair. However, at the same time he didn't want her to.

As he looked down at her he felt the emotions from their first night together start to stir in the pit of his stomach and the all too familiar warmth as it spread across his chest. He found his gaze trained on the light pink of her lips as they glistened in the sunlight. The desire to pull her forward and kiss them - change their relationship completely - was strong but he fought against his body to do so. It wasn't the right time or the right place.

He was allowed to stare at her all he wanted, but it was hazardous to actually start anything with her that went beyond friendship.

Finally, Maka nodded and smiled up at him again. "I don't think I've ever been over there, but I would love to see it."

"Great."

Hesitantly, he offered her his hand which she didn't waste any time in taking. As her fingers wrapped around his palm, he noted how warm they were and was reminded of their youth when they held hands almost daily during their training. Back then it had become second nature to reach out for her. It occurred almost like clockwork; each time they went out to go on a mission or he found himself nervous about a particular session, all he had to do was move his hand out slightly and hers would find it automatically. He felt safe and protected when he held her hand.

He swallowed the small lump in his throat as heat crawled over his skin. "I think you would really like it."

He led her in the direction of the docks as they remained holding hands. When compared to the inner portion of the city, it wasn't as crowded and the buildings were more spread out as they grew closer to the ocean. A mixture of fish and salty sea air wafted up into his nostrils and Soul felt an ease wash over him. He had visited the docks often in the day and months that followed his departure from Spartoi because he found that it was the only place in the city that allowed him to clear his mind with no distractions. There was something calming about the blue sea and allowed him to breathe easier.

Plus, the lack of people who weren't fishermen was also inviting.

They walked toward one of the docks that didn't have a boat tied to, and Soul released Maka's hand so that they were able to sit down on the edge. He had been correct in telling her that there was a nice lack of smog as the clear blue sky and sun shone down on them. A few birds flew over their heads and occasionally fish jumped out of the water before diving back down to the depths below. In the distance, in an unobservable part of the ocean, there was the distinguishable sound of a horn from a larger ship.

Soul breathed a sigh of relief as he allowed the cool wind to blow through his hair and kiss his warm skin. He glanced over at Maka and smiled. Ash blonde locks flew behind her as the wind came off the ocean and sun lightened the strands creating a small halo effect around her head, reminding him of a fallen angel. His heart fluttered at their mere image of her.

He still found it unbelievable that he was sitting beside her; that out of all their old friends, she chose him to be with. When she had called him, he didn't want to believe that she was back, but weeks later and she was really there within his reach. However, he didn't act on the small desire because in the back of his mind he feared if he did, she would disappear in vapor of fog. Or that he'd find out that his time with her was all a dream and in reality she was miles away with the Scythes.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?"

It took him longer than it should have to realize the meaning behind his own words as he felt the heat rise in his face. Lucky for him, she didn't pick up on the hidden meaning behind them and thought he had meant their view.

"Mhm. It is." She turned to look at him and the way the light sparkled in her eyes made him lose track of every coherent thought that ran through his mind. She was definitely a vision to be cherished. "How did you find out about this place?"

He blinked a couple of times as he tried to sort through his thoughts to find a decent enough answer that both satisfied her curiosity and didn't lead on to the secret he was holding from her. When Maka cocked her head to the side, he was finally able to form a decent, understandable sentence.

"After Wes died, I tried finding things that weren't damaging to my health to cope with it but soon realized there weren't that many. Found out about this place from a close friend of mine at the time, and it really helped me out back then."

"I'm glad." She smiled, but it faltered after a few seconds as her mind registered his words. "You didn't have anyone else to help you out back then? None of our friends from the academy?"

He wasn't sure how to answer that. It should have been obvious after seeing Black Star and Tsubaki at the diner but apparently not. "Um, no. They sorta all ditched me after my brother's passing. There wasn't really anyone for me to turn to except myself."

Pity filled Maka's eyes as she stared at him and he immediately regretted telling her the truth. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel sorry for him; he didn't need it. He was able to get through the turmoil on his own and having no one to help him had always been the best option for him anyways. It had always been him and Wes looking out for the other until only one Evans brother remained. Learning from a young age that he was the only person he was able to depend on had helped him also.

He was about to tell her so, but she spoke before he was able to.

"So you literally had no one?"

"No." He paused and licked his lips. "But I didn't need anyone, either. I was better on my own; I learned to depend on myself like a proper adult should. Really, Maka, I don't need you to pity me. Besides, I think I deserved to lose all my friends."

He stared out across the ocean and tried to avoid the nagging feeling in the back of his mind that told him he shouldn't have uttered the final sentence. Maybe it was the wrong thing, but he didn't care; she had to know that he was fine.

Maka placed her hand on his shoulder, pushing him a little so that he was forced to look at her. "Soul, don't say that. You know better than anyone that that's a lie."

Looking into her deep green eyes, he no longer saw pity etched across them like before; instead he saw anger and hatred flashing across them.

"You need at least one person to help you through a death, especially when it was someone who was very close to you. I wish you had told me sooner about Wes' death-"

"And what would you have done then? Come down here and try to comfort me or something? In case you didn't realize it, you were miles away from me! You were in another part of the country of christ sake, Maka!"

"I do realize that, but I wouldn't have let it prevent me from coming back to help my friend through a traumatic experience!"

"Oh right because Maka presence always makes things better, right? Because she would have waved her little wand and made everything better! News flash, that's not how things work! You can't just sweep shit under the rug and hope that makes it easier because it doesn't!"

"But I could have tried!" She cupped her hands over either side of his face and Soul noticed the desperation hiding behind green. "I could have been that person to help you get through whatever issues you had during the time, and I definitely would not have deserted you like everyone else did."

Shaking himself out of her grasp, he breathed out heavily and sulked on the dock. Arguing with her was useless, especially when she was so determined to get her point across to him. Maka was a very stubborn person who didn't stop at anything when it came to helping others see what she did. However, he was stubborn too, and for the moment he wanted to wallow in his own self pity and hate himself for what he had done. He didn't want her to make it better yet; he wasn't ready for that next step.

Although, in truth, the thought of her being the only person who didn't desert him all those ears ago did comfort him.

"Maka, I swear I didn't need anyone, and I still don't. I can get over Wes' death on my own; I don't need anyone and I especially don't need you." He regretted the words immediately. Turning his gaze away from her, he didn't see the hurt flash across her eyes, but the pain his chest was enough to know what the repercussions were.

"Soul."

Her voice was stern as she said his name, and he was almost too afraid to look at her but he did anyway. Maka's hands quickly cupped themselves over his cheeks again and she kept in place with a firm grip as she stared intently into his eyes.

However, when she spoke, her voice was calm and there was a sadness in it that he hadn't heard before. It almost broke his own heart just hearing it. "You do need someone and I'm not going to let you hate yourself over something you couldn't control. Wes' death wasn't your fault so you need to stop blaming yourself for it, please. I don't like seeing you so broken."

The sincere-ness behind her words seeped out with each syllable and bathed him in a warmth he had never known before. His heart pounded against his chest, and his thoughts changed into more intimate ones. He no longer wanted to remain still, sitting in the same position only inches away from her. His eyes darted from hers, down to her lips, and then back again. He did feel something for her - something that was more than just friendship - but what if he hurt her? Could they really have a relationship without him changing?

Soul swallowed. He didn't know what had compelled him to go further on the matter, but every reaction his body was experiencing felt natural and right. His heartbeat was thrumming in his ears, his palms were sweaty as he rubbed them against his pant leg, and his thoughts were swimming with the questions of what her lips would feel like. Maybe they would be sweet and soft as he pressed them against his; maybe she would taste like a warm summer day as he moved his tongue against hers.

He wouldn't know unless he tried.

And he did.

The kiss was awkward and it felt like it was a horrible idea as she remained still, but then she started to move her mouth against his and it felt right. Their noses bumped against the other as they tried to find an angle that suited them both, and he wasn't sure where to put his hands. Little chills flew down his spine as warmth filled his heart and flowed through the rest of his body. Her hands slowly moved away from his cheeks to intertwine themselves in his hair and small tingles crawled along his scalp at her touch. She moaned into his mouth as he dared to swipe his tongue out in order to taste just a tiny part of her. For one brief moment, all of his problems disappeared and there was only him and her in a world that was completely their own.

He didn't know what was happening to him exactly, but it was intoxicating and he was very intrigued to feel more. He had never kissed a girl - would be embarrassed to admit that he had practiced with a pillow under his brother's suggestion when he was younger - but the way her hands tugged on his hair to pull him closer told him he was doing it right. Cautiously, he moved his hands to the small of her back to press her closer to his body and his heart jumped at the small squeak from her. He loved everything about her. From the way her hands clawed at his scalp to the way her mouth lightly sucked on his bottom lip to the way her body perfectly molded against his own. He loved all of it and he didn't want to lose her ever again.

She broke away first, and the imprint her warm lips had left on his own was quickly replaced with the cool air around them. Upon seeing the confusion that flashed across her eyes, his elation was quickly diminished with worry. He tried to recall if she had kissed him back or not; he felt that she had - everything in his mind was telling him she had - but he feared it was a memory his mind was manipulating. A small portion of himself felt like had taken advantage of her and that he should have asked if it was okay to kiss her rather than doing it on a whim.

The apologies spewed out of his mouth before he was able to think of a proper sentence let alone anything coherent. His words came out as a jumbled mess and he continuously stuttered as he tried to excuse his actions like an idiot. Telling her the moment felt right to him even made him sound like a pervert who took advantage of women on a daily basis. No man who respected women would ever use that as an excuse, and he felt like the man in her stories about Spirit Albarn when they were younger. However, she silenced him with one finger over his mouth and smiled.

"Don't worry. I-I actually liked that." Her eyes softened as she stared at him before chastely kissing his lips again. "I actually really do like you. I've liked you for a long time now." She bit down on her bottom lip and looked off to the side. "I mean, unless you didn't mean it, then um… maybe we could talk it out?"

She was giving him an out, and he should have taken it but he didn't. Instead, he raised one hand to grab her chin and turned her face toward him. She looked so beautiful with her hair down, the wind gently blowing it in every which direction, and her eyes sparkled as she looked up at him. Butterflies fluttered around his stomach and he wanted nothing else than to be with her in that moment and treasure her for the rest of his life. As he rubbed his thumb along her jawline, he noted how soft her skin was before bending down to kiss her again.

When he broke away, he touched her forehead with his and smiled. "I'm glad."

For the moment he was happy, but something was clawing away and screaming at the back of his mind that it wasn't going to last long. His happiness with her was fleeting, and he needed to take it for granted for the time being because if he went too far, one of them was going to be hurt in the end.

* * *

Maka was more than happy that he had kissed her. Nothing in the world was better than the feel of his lips against hers, and she had been right, they were soft and sweet against hers. They didn't melt in her mouth like cotton candy, but they did make her own heart melt. The warmth that had spread throughout her chest and over her body was enough proof for that. Their kiss was the beginning of a new step in her life and it was everything she wanted. The stories she had read in romance and fairy tale novels were no match to their own love story. The tingles that crawled over her skin, the butterflies that fluttered in her stomach, and the blankness of her mind was more than she had ever expected.

She knew from the moment they met again that she loved him very deeply and now she didn't need any more validation of it.

They were going to last far longer than her parents ever did. Soul was nothing like Spirit and he never would be; he wasn't the type of person who would hurt her.

* * *

They were standing in front of the ruins, the desert sand blowing around their feet, and the sun's rays beating down on them. The inside was pitch black and neither were able to see what creatures lurked inside, but their mission was to find the cyborg. Taking a deep breath, Soul reached out for Maka's hand and they took their first steps forward. It wasn't like the last time they had been there; the inside of the ruins were cold, smelled musty, and the aura surrounding it was different. There were no eyes trained on them, and there was a haunting feeling about the place like there was a new evil presence there.

Maka dropped his hand and gasped. "Soul, what's wrong with you?"

His vision was blurred with red as he turned toward her, and his breaths came out in a loud heaving mess. The scar across his chest burned and the claws at the back of his mind were scratching against his skull to escape. The small voice was whispering incomprehensible things to him, but every human thought from before was erased. Instead he heard the same words repeated over and and over: kill Maka.

Taking a step forward, he unsheathed the knife from his side and raised it at the woman beside him.

She took a step back as she tried to talk some sense into him. "Soul, what are you doing? This isn't like you! Put the knife down!"

But he didn't listen as he continued to walk toward her. The thirst for her blood caused his mouth to water and he released a monstrous growl as he bared his teeth. Maka tripped on a rock and fell to the ground. She scooted away from him as her green eyes grew in terror at the sight before her. However, he refused to stop until he achieved his goal. The imagined what her blood would taste like as he lapped it up with his tongue and soaked it up in his mouth. His taste buds buzzed at the mere thought of it.

"Soul, stop! This isn't you! I know it isn't you!" She tried to put on a brave front, but he saw right through it. Fear was etched all over her face, and even a few tears were falling delicately along the outline of her cheeks. "Please, think about what you're doing!"

He laughed, but it didn't sound like him; it was dark and sinister, almost like the demon's voice that resided in his head. "You honestly think I give a fuck about what you think? You're just a naive, pathetic little girl who never saw the monster when it was standing right in front of her." He raised the knife over his head, the sunlight from outside glinting across the blade before he swiped it down as he aimed for her neck.

"Soul!"

He woke up with a start. His heart was pounding against his rib cage and his palms were sweaty as they grasped the sheets.

When he tried to fall back asleep that night, he didn't. The events from the nightmare were imprinted on the back of his eyelids, and each time he closed them, he saw Maka's frightened face frozen in time. The thirst for her blood was still strong on his tongue and no amount of water was able to quench it.

If there was one thing he learned from it, it was that the darkness that resided in him didn't want him to be with Maka. It wanted him to kill her, and that was something he wasn't willing to do.


	5. Darkness Comes at Midnight

In the weeks that followed their excursion to the docks and their first kiss, Soul found himself wanting more of her. He was slowly falling madly in love with the woman he had known when he was younger, and he felt the madness that came along with it crawling its way to the forefront of his mind. It was comforting and welcoming, so unlike the sensation that came with the darkness. This madness was the type that he found highly addicting and intriguing. He felt loved and cared for rather than resented and despised; he didn't have to worry about his sanity because she was worth it.

Maka was worth going mad over.

There had been other girls in his life, but none of them matched up to the woman holding his hand now. None of them caused his heart to flutter and his stomach to churn; none of them had ever been half as interesting as Maka. She was sunshine breaking through the clouds on a rainy day, the first taste of summer after a long winter. She was the type of person whose only purpose in life was to spread love and happiness to others, and it was those same things she filled his life with now. Maka was everything he wanted and everything he needed after a rough six years. In no time, she had helped him forget about Wes' death and his issues with the darkness - things that had plagued him for years on end - and he was forever grateful for that.

Everything about the woman was enticing, from the color of her eyes to the taste of her lips to the feel of her hand in his, and he loved it all. The small ash blonde pilot made him feel like a prepubescent boy, even in their adult years. His heart fluttered at the sound of her voice calling his name and warmth spread from his chest to the rest of his body. Small butterflies flew around in his stomach when she sat close to him, placing her warm hand in his and giving it a gentle squeeze.

For the first time in his life, Soul was content. It had been years since the last time he smiled so often or laughed so much; the muscles in his face were growing sore as he spent more time beside her. However, he would never change any of it, even if the world was on fire around them.

It was nice having her with him again; he never imagined in the days and years that had passed since she was assigned to the Scythes that they would meet again, let alone be together as a couple. Now that his wildest dreams had come true, he didn't want his old life back nor did he miss it.

He was in love with the sensation that overwhelmed his body when she wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him down for a kiss. His heart stopped for a millisecond, his world slowed down, and it was only the two of them in that moment. She calmed him down; his body fell into a peaceful state when she was around or at the faintest of touches. Even with the cackling voice in the back of his mind that liked to remind him how fleeting their time together was, it all felt right.

No matter how long he was with her, he wanted to ensure that each moment counted.

* * *

Being with Soul was everything her twenty-three year old and seventeen year old self had dreamed it would be. During their time at the academy, she had a glimpse of what it would be like; holding his hand when they were out, sitting close to each other, and feeling the light emotions that came with a relationship.

However, those small gestures didn't compare to the real thing. She felt like a silly little girl who was finally dating her crush after years of pining over him. Laughter bubbled up in her stomach and the smile never left her face when they were together. Soul made her happier than any other person she knew. Slowly, she was falling more in love with him, and she had yet to decide if it was good or bad. After years of guarding her heart, she felt herself start to open up to a man who had shown he was trustworthy.

She had loved Soul for the longest time, but she always believed it was as a friend than anything more. She had spent years waiting and wanting to be back in Death City with the ones she loved, but the person she had most wanted to be with was always Soul. Now that she was with him, it felt right to have his arms wrapped around her waist, his lips moving against hers. It supplied her younger self with the knowledge that it hadn't been idiotic to pine over a boy she never believed she had a chance with. It helped her feel that she was worth more than just friendship when it came to the man; that her seeing him in his moment of weakness wasn't a fluke or a mistake.

Before him, she had only been with one other boy, one of her fellow pilots in the Scythes Aerodynamics division. There had been a small spark between them - one that she now believed had to do with the fact that his personality was similar to Soul's. However, it was never as strong or as vibrant as her connection with Soul. She felt his touch throughout her body - whether it was his lips on hers or his hand resting on her hip. From her toes curling to the fiery heat that flowed in her lower abdomen, his touch was known everywhere within her.

It was addicting and she craved more of it as time went on.

Everything he did drove her crazy, and it took all of her self control in preventing her animalistic urges from taking over and ripping off his clothes every time they kissed. However, it proved to be a difficult task with each occurrence. The heat that the built up in her core when he bit her lip was invigorating, his sharp teeth lightly digging themselves into it causing her to moan against him. When he pressed her closer to him, his hands on the small of her back and molding their chests together, her heart beat wildly as it mimicked his own. The way he whispered her name against her neck left goose bumps on her heated flesh and her breath caught in her throat.

Never in her life had she felt like this, but she was wholly enjoying every second.

Each of his embraces and touches filled her with love and she wanted to return that love someway, somehow. Soul had changed her life for the better and she wanted him know it in ways she had never imagined she would. She found herself wanting to give him her all - her everything - because he was worth it, because that was how he made her feel. He was the first man in her life that she trusted completely, and she wanted him to know that.

However, instead of acting on her urges too soon, she tried to show him her love in different ways. Whether it was by lightly stroking his cheek after a particularly heated make out session or weaving her hands through his hair to bring him closer to her, she made sure he felt it. She loved him with all her heart to the point that she was worried it was going to burst, and she wanted him to feel the same way for her. She wanted to make him melt under her touch, to experience the same burning desire that was building up within her. She wanted him to know that he was loved.

Maka was falling more in love with him every second and a part of herself felt like he was falling in love with her

It was everything she wanted and then some.

Nothing was going to tear them apart, not ever.

* * *

Soul was out on a date with Maka when the reality of his situation slapped him clear across the face.

They were out walking the streets of Death City when they stumbled upon what appeared to be a small abandoned building. The aspect that had drawn them – more Maka than Soul – was the purple cat-like neon sign flashing their way that read 'psychic', and he was reluctantly dragged into the building under her insistence.

The inside appeared to be nicer compared to the outside; the walls were painted a deep purple and it smelled of lilac mingled with burnt wood rather than urine like the alley outside. Glancing around the small entry way, he noted the small vases of flowers on either side of the front desk and different symbols on the wall, including one that reminded him vaguely of a cat.

"Welcome," said a smooth, purr-like voice.

Turning to where the sound came from, Soul and Maka saw a voluptuous woman emerge from behind a curtained archway. The most striking feature on her was the color of her hair, a vibrant purple that was anything but normal, along with her attire. Rather than wearing the same clothing that the other women of Death City wore, she had on a raunchy top that showed off the curve of her chest and skirt that was shorter than any of Maka's skirts. As Soul eyed the woman up and down, he felt a small warmth trickle out of his nose - reminding him how inexperienced he really was.

Glancing over at Maka, who was glaring at him and the nosebleed, he gave her what he hoped was an apologetic smile and wiped the blood away. Cool guys were not supposed to be turned on by vixens who weren't their girlfriends; that certainly wasn't how he was raised.

"I'm Miss Blair," the woman said as she walked toward them. "And what brings you two kittens into my shop today?"

"We saw the sign and were curious about what was inside," Maka offered. She grabbed Soul's arm when _Miss Blair_  stood in front of them and took on an immediate liking to him as she carefully cocked her head to the side, staring at him with a small gleam in her eye. "But we're not interested so we'll just be going."

She tugged him away, but they were stopped in their tracks when the other woman reached out to grab his arm. She pressed her large breasts on him and he balked at the action. "Not so fast," she mewled out. "This is a very interesting man you have here. His aura is radiating different colors and I see something very strong growing within him."

Soul flinched and cringed away slightly when her fingers tickled the small stubble on his chin. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he didn't much like it. He had an inkling that he was being violated in some way and that the woman's actions fell under the jurisdiction of sexual harassment.

"What is he to you? Your brother? Family member? Or just a friend?"

"He's my boyfriend!" Maka growled out.

"Maka!" he chided.

Soul had never seen her act so hostile to another human being, someone she barely knew nonetheless. He was aware she had a temper, but he always assumed it was reserved for those close to her, not complete strangers.

"And I'd appreciate it if you weren't so hands-y with him!" she yelled, ignoring his own rebuke.

The woman blinked her yellow cat like eyes and released him. "Ah I see it now. You're highly defensive of him because you harbor very strong feelings for this man. That's definitely something I can respect."

He snuck a quick glance to his girlfriend and noticed a pink tinge coating her cheeks. Catching his gaze, she whipped her head away, crossing her arms in the process, and pouted. "Shut up."

"Aw, don't worry, kitten. He feels the same way about you," Blair said.

"Wh-what?"

"It's in your aura too, and I see it in your heart. You two were meant to be together, but there is something preventing you two from growing closer to the other…" She stepped a little closer to him, and Soul took a step back, not wanting her to see what she was talking about. "I'm not sure what it is, but I can definitely sense it."

Soul's heart jolted at her words.

He felt the darkness start to slowly claw its way into his mind again, the scraping sensation tickling the back of his mind and the faint whisper of a small demon. There was no possible way she had meant that aspect of himself; only a handful of people were aware of it which included himself and someone who was no longer living. How was a mere stranger who had just met him able to pick up on a thing like that? Not even Maka was aware of it yet.

His crimson eyes scanned the woman up and down, expecting to see a wire hooked to an ear piece of something, but came up short.

That ruled out someone feeding information to her.

"You're a phony, aren't you?" Maka asked with venom seething in her voice. He turned to stare down at her; for some odd reason, she wasn't taking a liking to Blair and he was curious to know why.

Blair's voice remained sweet as she spoke, Maka's tone having no effect on her. "Why would you say that?"

"Because we walk in and you immediately start flirting with my boyfriend. Then the minute we decide to leave, you pull on your fake fortune teller routine to keep us here." She pouted and mumbled the last bit under her breath. "Plus you remind me of the women my father used to hang around."

That was the reason.

"Maka." Soul gently grasped her arm and turned her to face him. He didn't much like this Blair character, but he knew she was definitely not a fake. At least, he had a gut feeling that she wasn't. "You don't have to be so vicious to her, she's only doing her job—"

"So you think she's the real deal?"

He opened and closed his mouth like a fish trying to speak underwater. The words that were on the tip of his tongue refused to come out because it was the wrong thing to say. Maka was a stubborn person whose opinion about someone else was hard to change, especially when she was determined to hate them beforehand. It was the whole reason there was still unresolved conflict between her and Spirit. The only good that came from disagreeing with her was her hating him for weeks and refusing to speak to him.

Finally, he said, "no, that's not it. All I'm saying is you should at least give her a chance. She's trying to be nice to you, and you're over here blowing up in her face. That isn't like you, Maka."

"I don't trust her, though. I mean did you see how she reacted when she saw you? She practically threw herself all over you like a complete slu—"

"Maka!" he cut in. He leaned in closer to her and whispered the next bit so that only she was able to hear. "You and I both know you're only acting this way because she reminds you of the women Spirit slept with when he cheated on your mother."

She opened her mouth to say something, but released a heavy sigh as she turned to the side. Biting down on her lip, she chewed the pink flesh. The girl knew he was right. "Fine."

"Perfect," Blair purred out. She bounced over to the two, grasped both of their hands in hers, and dragged them into the room she had emerged from earlier. "Now that that's settled, how about I offer you two a free palm reading? It's the least I can do for flirting with your boyfriend." She turned to wink at Maka, and Soul heard the blonde lowly growl in response.

Maka opened her mouth to protest, but Soul spoke first. "We would love to," he said while throwing his girlfriend a look that told her to keep her mouth shut and go along with it.

The room Blair led them to was darker in comparison to the one they had come from. A few candles that were spread around the room acted as the only light source, incense burned in one corner on a small end table, and a circular wooden table with three chairs set around it - one on the opposite side of the doorway and two facing it - sat in the middle of the room. The fortune teller pushed them into the chairs and walked around to sit down in her own personal chair. She removed a crystal ball and some cards from the table top, placing them on the floor, and stretched out her hands across the table to them.

"Who would like to go first?"

"I will," Maka said as she leaned closer to the table and rested her elbows on top of the table.

"Wonderful. Give me your right hand."

Maka did as she was told and Blair wasted no time in inspecting it. She grew steadily closer to Maka's palm, swiping a delicate finger over the lines that she saw and muttered incoherent words to herself.

Soul caught Maka's gaze as she quirked an eyebrow at him in question, asking if the woman was for real, but his only response was a small shrug. He felt like she was the real deal and their first encounter with her had been a fluke on her part. How else did he explain her knowledge in the darkness that swarmed his heart, mind, and soul?

After a few minutes, Blair finally picked her head up and smiled at the small blonde.

"This line here," she gently moved her finger along one of the lines on Maka's palm, "represents your love life. It tells me that you are very content with it, however, it touches your life line which means you have a very delicate heart. You put up a strong front, but you guard your heart with your life to the point that it's hard for you to trust people. I feel like you've been hurt one too many times in your lifetime which has lead you to behaving that way. Is this true?"

He saw Maka shake her head, but Blair was right. She had spent years guarding her heart from other men because she didn't want any of them to turn out like her father. When it came to his promiscuous behaviors, Spirit had not only hurt his wife, but he had also hurt his daughter in the process.

Soul had only seen her heartbroken once - it was when they had fought for the first time in their partnership and a few choice words had been said in the heat of the moment, words he didn't wholeheartedly mean. They were the same words that had opened old wounds and reminded her how fleeting their partnership really was; it was easy for him to find someone else at the academy, someone who was better than she was. He didn't mean it at the time - honestly Maka was the only partner for him - but it had hurt her nonetheless.

She was a strong woman on the outside, but on the inside she was still a person who had feelings.

"Mmm, I see," Blair hummed before turning her attention back to Maka's palm. "Now this line here is your head line. You have a deep, long line which is good; it means your behavior is clear and focused on the task at hand, although it can get distracted sometimes."

Maka's cheeks puffed out a bit, and Soul had to bite down on his lip to stop the small chuckle that had bubbled up in his throat from escaping. Maka Albarn was definitely not a person whose thoughts were clear and focused; more like mismatched and focused on the easy way out of a situation or not abiding by the rules to get her way. There were many times when she had made an idiotic mistake during their academy years, and he allowed it because she had to learn on her own.

"Now your life line is long and deep," the fortune teller continued, "but it does go straight down and ends closer to the edge of your palm. That means your life is filled with liveliness, and that's something you definitely strive to keep up with, but when it comes to relationships, you're very cautious. That is a very interesting combination."

"My favorite line on you is your fate line, though, because while you develop your aspirations early on, fate is what truly holds your destiny in her hands rather than you yourself." Blair looked up once again. "Have you noticed that things don't usually go as you plan them to?"

Slowly, Maka nodded her head.

"Just as I expected." The woman dropped Maka's hand and reached out for Soul's. "Your turn, handsome, but it's your left hand."

He mimicked the same action that Maka had performed earlier but with his opposite hand, and watched as Blair performed the same scrutinizing gestures that she had done with Maka's hand before she spoke again.

"I usually start out in the same order that I did with your girlfriend, but there's something very intriguing about your fate and life line. Your fate line curves down to join the life line in the middle, which signifies that your own interests have had to change because of others, but it also breaks in the middle which is never good."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I mean your fate seems to change from external forces that control you rather than your own actions. It isn't like destiny who controls your girlfriend's fate, but rather other beings, other creatures." She paused and raised her yellow cat eyes up to him, a small gleam of fear pricking behind them. "I'm also picking up something dark and sinister that surrounds you. I saw it when you first walked in. It wants to destroy… one of you."

Soul tore his hand away and stared wide eyed at the woman. "What are you talking about?"

"You know exactly what I'm talking about." The woman's eyes grew sorrowful and her smug grin fell from her lips. "I see it now in your eyes. There's a darkness swarming around your heart, and it's fighting to take control." Blair leaned in closer to him. "You need to be careful and control that demon inside of you, unless you want a repeat of what happened to your brother."

His heart stopped beating and his breath caught in his throat at the mention of Wes. She was definitely not a fake; she was the real deal. There was no other way for her to know about his brother the events that surrounded his death.

Fear bubbled up in his throat as her words registered in his mind. If he wasn't careful, Maka was going to meet her demise the same way that Wes had. If he allowed the demon to control him again, she was going to end up six feet under, living in a confined space for all of eternity. That was something he wasn't able to handle – didn't want live with was more like it. A world without Maka in it was dark and cold, whether she was standing beside him or against him.

He knocked his chair over as he roughly stood up and left the small building, ignoring Maka's cry for him to come back – ignoring everything around him as he stepped outside. From the busy street out in Death City to the small bell of the door, he ignored it all.

None of it was fair.

Destiny wasn't controlling his fate and neither was he; it was that stupid little demon residing in his head, the same one he had tried so hard to get rid of. There had to be an escape from the darkness and everything that came with it, but the only question was how? How was he going to make himself sane again in order to protect Maka? How was he going to protect her from himself?

_Did you miss me?_  came a hauntingly familiar voice that stilled Soul's steps as he stood staring out into the rest of the world that continued to move.

_It's been some time, hasn't it? You've been keeping me locked up for far too long, and now I'm ready to play. How about we start with that little girlfriend of yours? See what her blood tastes like? What her insides look like? What her blood looks like smeared all over our hands? How about it, Soul-boy?_

"No," he whispered out loud.

The demon had awoken and it only meant more trouble for him.

* * *

Maka rushed out of the fortune teller's business – spewing her apologies to the woman as she went – and stopped when she reached the alleyway outside. She found Soul clutching his head near the busy sidewalk, staring blindly out at the people passing by. None of them paid him any mind as they continued with their daily business, but she had a feeling it didn't matter.

It wasn't them he needed.

There was something odd about the way he was standing there, his body posture was off; it reminded her of a frail bird who had fallen from its nest and wasn't sure what to do. From staring at his back, she saw that he was wounded in some invisible way that his heart was aching over something he kept hidden from her which caused her own heart to ache. She wanted to comfort and love him; she wanted to tell him that everything was going to be okay, that whatever hidden message he saw behind the fortune teller's words was wrong.

Very cautiously, she walked toward him and gently placed her hand on the small of his back. Like a chain reaction, his arms immediately dropped to his side at her touch and the confusion in his dark eyes was replaced with affection as he glanced down at her. However, there was a certain kind of sadness behind them that she wasn't able to place her finger on. It bothered her to no end, but she chose not to comment on it.

Now wasn't the time for that.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm… perfectly fine."

She caught the hesitation in his voice and lightly shook her head. "No, you aren't. Do you wanna talk about it?"

He opened his mouth, but then closed it. Looking away, his eyes grew darker and he balled his hands into fists at his side. "No. This is something I have to handle on my own."

Removing her hand from his back, she placed it on his hip and pulled herself closer to him as she smoothed a hand down the side of his face. She felt the small stubble that rested on his face and the warmth of his skin beneath her fingers. He flinched at her touch, like an animal who was expecting to be abused rather than loved, and it broke Maka's heart even more.

"If it has something to do with what that fortune teller told you, ignore her. She's wrong, okay? She doesn't know the first thing about you and me. Plus she was a fake, anyways. They all are, you should know that. You're not gonna hurt me because I know you and-"

"Maka! Shut up! You don't know a fucking thing, okay?!"

Her hand dropped from his waist and she took a step back. Throughout the years she had known him, he had never yelled at her like that. The pupils of his eyes were dilated as he stared down at her, making Maka feel smaller than she actually was, and his lips were pressed so hard together that the color was drained from them. Fear boiled up in her stomach as she cautiously watched him, waiting to see what his next move was going to be. He reminded her of a crazed animal ready to attack, and she was the idiot remaining in front of it, placing her own life at risk.

However, nothing happened.

Soul schooled his facial features to becoming stoic once again, and he bashfully glanced down at the ground. "I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to yell at you."

Maka slowly nodded her head. "But that doesn't make it right, you know that."

"I know." Soul sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he closed his eyes. "I just need to be alone for a while, okay?"

She nodded, but stopped him by grabbing his arm as he walked by. "Be careful, okay? Don't do anything stupid." Her grip slackened on his arm as she hesitantly stepped up on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. She smoothed a hand through his hair before giving him one last kiss and then falling back down. "Let me know when you feel better."

"Yeah," he weakly let out.

Her hand dropped from his arm, and Soul disappeared in the crowd behind them. Slowly, her heart started to break; she hated seeing Soul so upset and angry over something stupid like the words of a phony fortune teller. It wasn't dangerous for them to be together, why didn't he see that? They had chosen to remain by the others side through much worse than a threat on her life, and they had conquered so many obstacles when they were younger. The trick was that they had to do it together. Separately they were strong, but together they made an unstoppable team.

Sighing, she left the alley and made her way over to Black Star and Tsubaki's apartment.

If there was someone in this godforsaken town that knew what was torturing the man, it had to be one of them.

* * *

A few weeks had passed since Tsubaki and Black Star had crashed her diner date with Soul, and she had spent that time sending them texts rather than seeing them in person. She also had yet to inform either of them about her new relationship with Soul which had largely to do with the tension that she saw buzzing between Soul and Star at the time. The way the blue haired ninja had looked and acted around her boyfriend hadn't gone unnoticed by her.

It was different compared to when they were younger; Star's movements were cautious and wary when he was sitting by Soul. Every little thing that the white haired man did, Star reacted to it automatically. It was similar to a lioness stalking her prey. He was waiting for him to do something, but she didn't know what exactly. She had known Star since they were children - their parents worked together at Shibusen as pilots - and it wasn't in his nature to be that observant when it came to his friends. He usually reserved his ninja reflexes and behaviors for enemies and those who betrayed his own friends.

Something had happened between the time she had left Death City and the time she had returned, and she was determined to find out what.

She had never been to their apartment before, but Star had sent her the address of the place and it didn't take her long to find it.

"Hey, Maka!" Star greeted, allowing the door to bang on the wall as he thrust it open.

The apartment was different compared to Soul's and much more resembled Maka's own. There were individual rooms separated by a concrete wall and painted an eggshell color. A few photos were scattered along the wall, featuring Tsu and Star standing in front of their solar ship from one of their missions. There was also a brass and copper cog sculpture resting in the middle of the photographs. Star led her toward their living room where there were two couches and gestured to one of them for her to sit down.

"So, how'd you like it up there in snoresville? Bet it was boring without me, huh?" he boasted.

"I found the lack of idiots jumping off buildings very disappointing," Maka smiled.

"That's because there's no one as great as me!"

He crossed his hands behind his head and leaned back on the couch, softly humming to himself. Maka stared at the man lovingly as she embedded the memory of him into her mind; he had changed throughout the years as far as looks went, but he was still the same person underneath. His god complex was still going strong, and he was still full of himself but he also cared very deeply for his friends. Black Star was definitely one of the people she had missed during her time with the Scythes.

Popping one eye open, he asked, "and I'm sure it was me you wanted to see as soon as you got back, right? Couldn't wait to see your god again and marvel at my amazing physique."

Maka rolled her eyes and sighed. He was definitely the same Black Star.

When she spoke, her voice was oozing with sarcasm it would have made their old teacher Stein beam with joy. "Oh, of course. It was always you that I compared all the guys to when I was out, but none of them were even able to _live up_  to my high expectations thanks to you. I'm so glad to be in your presence once again."

"Just as I expected," he smirked.

There was short pause as Maka fiddled with the hem of her skirt, picking at a loose string on the fabric before she looked back up at him. "Star, may I ask you something?"

The man removed his arms from behind his head and leaned onto his knees, his face turning from playful to serious in one quick swoop. She was slightly taken aback by his sudden demeanor because he rarely showed this side of himself to anyone; he was often the person who liked to crack jokes and boast about how great he was. It was rare for him to meddle in his friend's lives unless they were doing something that was foolish and went against their own moral compass.

"Sure. Go ahead."

"Can you tell me what happened between you and Soul when I was gone?"

He leaned back in his chair and squinted at her. "Is that really why you came here Maka? To talk about  _him_? If that's the case, you can get the fuck out of here because Soul is the last person I wanna talk about."

Maybe it was rude of her to come into his home without asking him how he had been or what was new in his life, but she was on a mission that she was determined to accomplish.

Star stood up and made his way to the kitchen, but Maka grabbed his arm to stop him in his tracks. "Wait. I know it's rude of me to come in here and ask you about someone you don't give a shit about, but if you won't do it for him, then do it for me. Something's wrong with Soul and he refuses to talk to me about it. I have to know what happened when I was gone, please."

His back stiffened at the mention of Soul's name, but he didn't budge. Star remained still in front of her; his muscles pulsed under her grip and she felt his faint heartbeat as her fingers pressed into his skin. She wasn't going to release him until he said something. The man knew how stubborn she was - hell that was why they had become friends so easily - and she refused to go down without a fight.

After a few minutes, she broke the silence. "Please, Black Star. Tell me."

"You really wanna know what happened to Soul while you were away?" He yanked his arm out of her grip but kept his back toward her. "I'll tell you what that fucking bastard did. He tried to kill me, did he tell you that?"

She blinked a few times and felt her mouth drop slightly. "What?"

"He tried to kill me!" Star whirled around and his dull green eyes were blazing as he stared down at her. The hatred was evident as their eyes met, and the fear she had felt with Soul earlier started to boil in her stomach.

"Your little boyfriend had his hands around my neck two days after his brother died because he doesn't know how to take a fucking joke!"

"His brother had just died. What did you expect for him to do? Be the same joking kid you knew at the academy? He was grieving, Star-"

"You don't know anything, Maka!" he spat out. "You didn't see the crazed look in his eyes! It was like he wasn't himself! It took both Kilik and Ox to get him off of me! If he had stayed any longer then I would have died! Is that what you wanted to hear?"

"That doesn't make sense, though. Soul would never try to kill you. He doesn't have it in him-"

"Maka." His voice had calmed down a little as he said her name. "I don't care what you and Soul do or who you date because I don't have any control over that. But you are my best friend so I will tell you this; whatever you do, don't trust Soul. He can turn on you at any minute. I know you have this whole good boy image of him still ingrained in your brain, but that isn't him anymore. He's a monster, and you would do better if you stayed away from him."

She lightly shook her head. "Soul isn't a monster. Where are you people getting this from?"

"If you had been there after Wes' death, you would see it too. Soul's a monster and the sooner you realize that, the better."

"If I had been there I wouldn't have abandoned my  _friend_ when he needed me the most! Did any of you ever think about that? How it had affected him knowing that the people he trusted just left him?"

"I get the feeling Soul was never really my friend so I don't regret doing that to him." He licked his lips and breathed out heavily as he stood to his full height. "You know everyone's afraid of him, right? Even Tsu's afraid of him, and she's the one who hardly ever thinks badly of anyone. We all have a good reason for keeping our distance from him and it's time you did too."

"I refuse to do that," she said. "I'm not going to abandon Soul just because you and everyone else in this damn town thinks I should! He deserves to have someone with him, and if I'm that only person, then so be it. At least I know I actually care enough about him not to leave him moping around by himself! I will stand by Soul no matter what."

Star scowled at her as he shook his head. "And what if he tries to kill you like he did with me? Or like he did with Wes? What are you gonna do then? Will you still defend him?"

"Of course I will! Because I know that isn't Soul!" She paused to register his words completely, and cocked her head to side. "What do you mean like Wes?"

He opened his mouth to respond, but right at that moment the front door opened to reveal Tsubaki with a bag of groceries. "Black Star, I'm home! Oh, hi, Maka."

The blonde smiled at the taller girl before laying her eyes back on Star. She noted the desire to say more as it sparkled in his eyes, the words burning on his tongue as they begged to be released, but he didn't say anything more on the matter. Instead he leaned down and whispered, "just be careful. I don't want you to get hurt," in her ear.

She nodded - that was all she was able to do - and stored his worries and their conversation into the back of her mind for later. The only thing she regretted was that she didn't find out what she had really wanted.

What exactly happened to Wes?

* * *

Soul slammed the door to his loft and leaned against it as he clutched a hand to his chest. It rose and fell as he stood there, his pulse beating rapidly beneath his fingertips.

He was having another panic attack; it vibrated through his body and his bones ached as his chest grew heavier than normal and his mind went berserk. Words refused to come from his mouth, his breathing became ragged, and all his coherent thoughts had escaped him. There was only him and the world as it rocked beneath him. Glancing up at the ceiling, he saw the small shapes that were painted there and tried to focus on them; usually they helped him calm down, but tonight it wasn't working.

Taking the hand that wasn't on top of his chest, he ran it through his hair and sighed.

"Fuck, get some control over yourself. You cannot be acting like this, at least not here, not now. You can't be going back… you just can't," he sobbed out.

His insides started to break as the panic rose and the clawing at the back of his head became more vigorous and insistent. The darkness was slowly creeping its way back into his life, clouding his vision as his eyes scoured the empty home for any sign of an escape. A quiet corner. A secluded place to lay down. Anything.

Then his eyes fell upon the piano sitting by the window. Its ivory keys were beckoning him forward as he stared at it, the moonlight from the window shining down bright on it like a spotlight. He felt his legs push themselves up off the floor and his muscles moved as he made his way blindly toward it like a siren calling him from the wide open sea. His fingers delicately traced over the keys, pressing down as he played a single note.

It had been a long time since he last played her. When he had a show to do at the local jazz bar, he always used the one that was supplied for him. This one hadn't been touched since Maka came over and before that, the last time he really played it was when Wes was still alive. Closing his eyes, he tried not to think further on the matter because it had been his brother who had gifted him the piano.

…

Soul thinks it's pretty silly that his brother wants to blindfold him and lead him out to where his seventeenth birthday present is hiding. However, it is his brother and he doesn't really expect anything less from him. Wes always did like to make a big deal out of holidays and birthdays. Even when they were little, it was always his big brother who jumped on his bed at exactly midnight to tell his little brother 'happy birthday' or something.

"How much farther is it?" Soul cries out as his brother pushes him up yet another flight of stairs.

"Considering we live on the top floor, we still have another three flights of stairs."

The younger Evans brother groans about but continues to take it one step at a time, hoping he doesn't trip on one and fall on his ass. If that were to happen, Wes would never let him forget it; he had a streak for remembering every single one of Soul's mishaps, claiming it was because that's what older brother did. He himself called bullshit on that. Older brothers were supposed to look out for their younger brother, not tease them nonstop because they caught them making out with their pillow.

"Ah, we made it," Wes says as he leads Soul onto the landing.

"Thank god," Soul mumbles.

His brother wraps his hand around his wrist and practically drags him down the hall to where their shared apartment is. The apartment itself is on the shady side of town and Wes only rented it because it was the cheapest he was able to find a few months ago. Neither one of them wanted to use their parent's money; they both prefer to struggle to make ends meet on their own without mommy and daddy's help.

Hearing the click of the door, Soul waits for his brother to lead him inside and to what feels like the middle of the loft. A few seconds pass by before Wes finally removes the blindfold, and Soul blinks a few times to adjust his eyes to the lighting of the room until he sees his present. Standing in front of the wall to wall windows beneath the stained glass one that Wes had designed, sits a single piano. It's the same design, shape, and color of the one he had been eyeing since he was eleven.

"You bought me a piano?"

"You don't like it?"

Shaking his head, he says, "no, I love it. It's just… I haven't played in years. Why would you do that?"

Music had never been his passion, and his brother knows that. However, he also knows how the piano had been a large part of his life and that sometimes he did like to unwind by playing a small tune.

"I know music has never really been your heart's calling, but I also know that you like to have an outlet for your emotions too." Wes nudges his brother lightly with his elbow. "Don't think I never heard you playing at one in the morning when you thought everyone was asleep. I get it, we both needed a way to vent our feelings when it came to the parents."

Soul smiles at his brother. "Heh, thanks. At least someone likes my music."

"Hey." Wes' smile is warm and comforting as he places a hand on his brother's shoulder and gives it a gently squeeze. "I'm proud of you, and no matter what, I'm not giving up on you."

…

He opened his eyes to find himself sitting on the small bench. Staring out at the buildings before him, he silently laughed but it wasn't an amused laugh; it sounded pained and forced as it left his lips and Soul's heart pained. Not only had he lost a brother, but soon he was going to lose Maka too. Life refused to let him have anything good around him and he hated it. He hated that he had to live in misery all because of a stupid mistake from when he was younger.

If he had learned to control himself, then the demon within him wouldn't have come alive. He'd still be living his brother, his life would have been happier, and he'd be able to be with Maka without worrying about her safety.

But that wasn't how his life had ended up.

"Heh, you still proud of me Wes? You're gone because of me and now Maka might die the same way you did. I bet you've given up on me by now." He bowed his head and swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat. "I know I already have."

Pounding his elbows on the keys causing a distorted loud noise to ricochet off the loft walls, he rested his head in his hands. He hated his life, his loft, and everything around him. They all reminded him of simpler times when Wes was still alive and was living with him. Of the times they spent lazing around their home before his untimely death. Their jokes and teasing lines still hung in the air like the smell of stale meat, haunting him until his last dying days. He missed the time when his hands weren't stained with the blood of his brother. Shaking his head, he wished it was possible for him to go back to that year and cherish the final moments he had with his brother before his life turned to shit.

Standing up from the bench, Soul staggered toward the bathroom. His body felt heavier with each step he took and the tips of his fingers started to grow numb. He wasn't sure what had happened throughout the day to make him feel like this - to cause the clawing at the back of his mind to become louder - but he knew it only meant trouble. Not only for Maka, but for him as well. If he stepped out of line again, no one at Shibusen would protect him. There would be no one else to turn to when things grew dark and unpleasant.

He would truly be alone once again.

Somehow he made it to the bathroom, hands knocking everything off the sink counter as he tried to steady himself. The world was spinning around his feet, his breathing was shallow and raspy, and his vision started to blur with each passing second. This wasn't good. His body didn't feel fine; he felt like hacking up the food from earlier that day or falling to the ground to weep. He felt embarrassingly weak, and all he wanted was to have somebody there to comfort him.

He shut his eyes as the tears started to sting his eyes. The small drops splattered delicately on the marble below him as his body shook and he released every single emotion he had held in the weeks that passed. It was futile; he and Maka were a lost cause. They were two people who were never meant to be together, and deep down he knew it. It hurt him to admit it, but it was the truth.

If he truly loved Maka, he would end things with her. He would allow her to live her life with someone else if it meant she would stay alive. If she stayed with him, it would only lead to her death.

But that was the thing about Soul; he was a selfish being who wanted to cherish every single lasting moment he had with the woman. It was dangerous -  _he_ was dangerous - but he didn't know what else to do. He loved Maka and it would pain him to know that she was with someone else.

Even though it did mean she would be safe and happy.

It was an ongoing battle in his head, and he didn't know which part to listen to. The demon started to show his face behind Soul's closed eyes and the voice in his mind wickedly mocked his helplessness. Removing his hands from the countertop, he cradled his head between his palms and begged the demon to leave him alone. He was fully aware of the consequences, he didn't need the reminder.

One life to keep his sanity; that was the price to pay.

"What am I supposed to do though?" he sobbed out, his voice cracking on the last syllable.

He dropped his hands, opened his eyes, and for the first time in a couple weeks, he looked at himself in the mirror. The face that stared back at him didn't appear to be his own; it was more ghostly and tired than he remembered. Bags hugged the bottom of his eyes, and his cheeks weren't as chubby like before. He vaguely wondered why no one - Maka in particular - had asked him about his mental state because he looked exactly like he felt: hell.

However, it told him what he needed to know about his situation. It was steadily going to get worse; the nights when he didn't sleep were going to grow longer and the moments where he weren't himself were going to become more frequent. He was either going to have to stay with Maka and watch her blood stain his hands or end things with her and watch as she lived her life with someone else - someone who wasn't him. His heart pained at the thought of her with someone else and jealous roared up in his blood. Neither of the options were favorable to him.

"Wes." The name was small as it left him, but it felt like a silent prayer as he uttered it out into the silence. A prayer for someone to help him; someone who was long gone and couldn't. "I wish you were here so you could tell me what to do… I can't do this alone." His tongue flicked out to wet his lips. "I just can't."

He bowed his head in defeat as a new wave of tears fell from his eyes. "I'm sorry, Wes. I'm sorry I couldn't control the monster inside of me. I wish it was me who had died instead."


	6. Honest Man in Chains

The nightmare had always started out the same.

The same dark hallway and the same door at the end, so when it occurred that night, he didn't really think anything of it. At least not until the whole situation changed. The demon wasn't in his normal position – standing by the back door – and was instead taunting him from behind as Soul made his way down the hallway. The secret that Oni was telling him had to do with the fact that there was something new hidden behind the door, and that was the moment when he began to panic. The moment when he realized this was more than just a dream.

It was a reality he feared.

He walked down the dark, cramped hallway – the walkway was wide enough that his broad shoulders brushed against the walls – and dark red blood dripped down the walls. It was hot and sticky to the touch as it coated his hands. The bloodcurdling screams emitting from the unmarked rooms around scraped his eardrums and chills washed over his body as he tried to ignore them

Fear rose in his body as he pushed himself further, his heart pounding as the dark red door came into view. While he knew exactly what grotesque image was waiting for him behind it, he found himself unable to turn around even if he wanted to; the desire to escape was strong, but his feet continued to step forward. The hallway shortened with every step he took – trapping him and preventing him from backtracking as it forced him to continue forward.

He was a few feet away from the door when he heard it, the familiar cackling of the little red demon that resided in his nightmares, but he wasn't standing in front of the door like in the past. Soul slowly turned around to find Oni standing directly behind him, wearing the same gaudy black suit as always and the familiar snide smile was plastered on his face. However, something told Soul it was for a whole new reason compared to the past times when had appeared.

"What are laughing at?" he asked.

"Oh, my dear Soul boy, I have a new surprise waiting for you behind the door today. I think you will much prefer this one rather than the other one… or maybe you won't. All depends on how you see it," the demon told him, snapping his fingers to the tune of the screams.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" The scene behind the door hadn't changed in the last six years, or at least not since the accident. The only explanation for it changing now was because of…

"Is it-is it Maka this time?"

His heart chilled over as dread vibrated through his bones, filling every single one of his blood vessels with ice as his body turned numb. If Maka was the one this time, he wasn't sure how to handle it. Everything behind the door spelt out trouble; they were premonitions that came true in the real world. He had predicted his brother's death, but there was nothing for him to do about it at the time. The prediction had been set in stone and it is unpreventable; he had to relive that day each time this particular nightmare occurred and hope for it to change one day.

If it was Maka this time, there was no getting around with ending things between the two of them. He wasn't going to allow her to face the same fate as Wes all because of him.

But the demon only shrugged. "Can't say. You'll only find out if you open the door."

Soul turned around to stare at the door in front of him and tried to work up the courage to open it. He had a small inkling of what might be behind it, but at the same time he wasn't ready to face it. After a few minutes of debating what to do – a battle between his mind and his heart – he reached his hand out to turn the golden knob. However, it only hover over it, prolonging the inevitable as his anxiety started to rise within him.

"Come on now, Soulie boy. Just turn that little knob. You can't escape here unless you do it, you know that," the demon cackled.

Soul wanted to personally strangle the thing to death and all of his suffering then and there, but knew that was impossible due to the countless times he had tried just that.

Instead, he placed his hand on the doorknob, his fingers curling around it, and slowly pried it open. The room was shrouded in darkness preventing him from seeing anything more than a foot in front of him, but he heard what sounded like a woman silently crying inside. He stepped inside and the red tinted lights illuminated the room like normal, but sitting beside Wes this time was Maka as she cradled his brother's head in her lap and hunched over him.

"Maka?" his voice cracked on the last syllable. His fear was apparent with the utterance of the one simple word.

She glanced up, the tips of her blonde hair coated in blood and tear stains streaked down her cheeks. His brother's face was mangled and torn like all the past times he had seen it when it was him alone who appeared in Soul's nightmare. The blood and grime smeared all over was once golden blonde hair sickened him as his stomach dropped and warm vomit worked its way up his throat before he swallowed it down. He rubbed the sweat off his palms on his pant leg before taking a cautious step inside.

"Soul, how could you? He was your brother," she cried out, her voice weak and strained.

"I didn't-I didn't mean to. It was an accident, I swear!" Panic rose in his throat while his breathing became heavier and more rigid by the second. He knew she was going to find out eventually, but this wasn't how he wanted it to happen. He wasn't ready to see what her reaction was going to be, he didn't want to know.

Not now.

Not here.

Not in a place where he couldn't run away.

"He was your brother!" she cried out again. "Of all people, why did you do this to him? He loved you, Soul. He would have done anything for you. Did you not care about him?"

"I-I did, Maka, I swear I did - still do. It was an accident. He was never meant to..." He took a step closer to her, his hands reaching out to comfort her, make her believe him, but she flinched away and his heart cracked in his chest. "Please, Maka. You have to believe me. I never meant to hurt him."

"But you did, Soul." Her voice was cold and dead. There was no life in it, no kindness.

This wasn't  _his_  Maka.

He tried to tell himself that this was all a dream, that she would never do this, but every attempt was countered with denial. Once the real Maka found out about the horrible events of that day six years ago, this was going to be her exact reaction. She was going to leave him like the others had, refusing to look him in the eye ever again, and once again he was going to be alone.

For the second time in his life, he was going to have to depend on himself to get through his own demons.

That was something he wasn't ready for just yet.

"You're a monster, Soul."

"You don't mean that!" he yelled. "This is all a dream! Just another stupid dream."

"Oh, is that what this?" came the smooth, mocking sound of the demon.

Soul turned his head, glaring at the little red monster. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Well, isn't this your mind, Soulie? Isn't this your worst nightmare? The one person you love - the only one who loves you - calling you a monster and leaving you forever… isn't that what you fear the most?"

Soul allowed his words to sink in, the truth behind them washing over him like a ton of bricks. The little demon wasn't lying. Before Maka showed up, the nightmare had featured his brother dying on the cold ground, calling out for Soul by name and begging him for help. However, Soul only stood by as he watched his brother get hacked to death by one of the dream demons. That was his worst fear then – facing the truth of the events – and now his worst fear was that Maka was going to find out from someone who wasn't him. That she wasn't going to forgive him for what he did and walk out of his life forever.

"I meant what I said, Soul. You're a monster and," he braced himself for what was to come, "I never want to see you again. I won't risk my life to be with you, especially if  _this_  is what I have waiting for me."

He whipped his head back toward her. "I would never hurt you, Maka!" he yelled. "Please, you need to believe me! I love you and I will  _never_  hurt you. Please… just please believe me."

"Liar," she whispered.

Her fierce green eyes pierced through his soul, stabbing every part of his body. He felt her hatred seep through her glare and radiate off her body; the air around him grew hotter as his blood ran cold and his heart froze over. Tears stung the back of his eyes as the familiar tingling spreading across his hands as he wanted to reach out to her – beg her to stay with him. He wanted to show her that he wasn't the monster she believed him to be.

He wanted her to love him like she had down throughout the time she had known him.

Her deserting him wasn't going to happen; he refused to let it happen.

No matter what, he was going to fight for her, make her believe him.

He wasn't going to lose her again, not when she just came back into his life.

"Maka-"

"Don't come any closer to me! Don't touch, don't look at me; just leave me alone! Get out of my life!"

Soul woke up in a cold sweat. As he grasped the sheets beneath him, he felt the wetness seeping into them and his clothes clung to his body. He was hot all over, his heart pounding in his chest while his head was throbbing.

Tossing the covers off his body, Soul swung his legs over the bed and propped his elbows on his knees, resting his head in his hands. It was definitely one of his more intense dreams. Forcing him to face his worst fear was never an easy feat, but he also didn't expect it to go exactly like it had. The old familiar nightmare was more welcoming than one that featured Maka alongside his brother's cold dead body. He wasn't ready to lose the woman he loved because of a secret he had been hiding from her since the moment she arrived back in Death City.

He removed his sleep shirt, throwing the sopping material carelessly to the side of his bed before walking to the bathroom. The man in the mirror looked like he hadn't slept in months; the bags under his drooping eyes made him appear even more tired than normal, his hair was a tangled mess as it stuck up in every direction, and he swore there were a few new wrinkles at the corners of his eyes that weren't there before. He looked older than he actually was because of it – the white hair not helping with matters either.

Slipping out of his sleep pajamas, he placed them to the side and turned on the water in the bathtub. He waited a few minutes for the water to warm before stepping underneath it as it cooled his burning skin. He scrubbed away at his body, trying to remove the leftover sweat and heat as well as the fear crawling along his skin from the dream. He tried not to let his thoughts wander too far, afraid they would venture into what had happened in the dream and remember the chilling words Maka had said to him.

That was a memory – among others – that he did not want to remember, but he knew that no matter how hard he tried, it always came back. It replayed over and over in his mind to the point where he felt like he might just go completely mad.

After finishing his quick shower, Soul dried off and dressed in fresh pajamas before going back to bed. He wanted to at least attempt to get a good hour or so of rest before the next day, or at least try to forget the dream as he remained awake throughout the rest of the night.

* * *

Maka noticed something was off about Soul almost immediately and Black Star's words started swimming around in her head. She wasn't able to shake it no matter how hard she tried. There was truth behind them, and she was witnessing it for the first time right in front of her. Soul wasn't the same person she had known during the academy; he appeared to be darker and there was a sinister stare behind his crimson eyes. Something was wrong, she sensed it in the air around him, and she wanted to know what it was.

That was probably the reason why she continued to stay around him no matter how much he tried to push her away. She was aware of that too. The way he talked to her, spoke her name, and his body movements were all different, like he was withdrawing into himself again. His kisses had changed, along with the way he touched her; it bothered her, but she didn't know how to change any of it. Soul was falling apart right in front of her, yet there was nothing she could do about it except standby and watch.

Using the spare key he had given her weeks ago, Maka opened the door to his loft after gently knocking on it for ten minutes.

"Soul?" she called out into the dark home, quietly closing the door behind her.

Glancing around the open space, she didn't see any sign of the man in question. His home was completely empty except and there was no sign of life except for a couple of empty beer bottles on his dining table and an open leftover container. She walked over to throw away the trash, the bottles echoing against the walls as they hit the bottom of the trash can, and Maka heard the faint rustle of sheets from the bed behind her. Turning around, she saw a small lump on the bed slowly start to stir and a white head peeked out from underneath the blankets.

"Maka?" Soul groaned out as he fully emerged. "What are you doing here?"

"I haven't heard from you in the past few days and I started to worry so I came over to check on you." She walked the distance between them and sat down on the edge of his bed. "You okay? It looks like you haven't slept in weeks."

He let out an irritated snort. "You can say that."

She paused as she watched him rub the heel of his hands on his hands, trying to rid himself of the sleepiness that was no doubt still there, and quickly glanced over his appearance. His hair was a rustled mess more than usual, there were dark circles around his eyes, and faint red marks littered his bare chest like he had been clawing at himself in his sleep. To put it lightly, he looked like hell.

"Are you having nightmares again?" she asked.

Soul blinked a few times before answering her. "You can say that, too."

"If they're screwing with your sleep schedule, you should go see someone about it. Maybe there's some type of medicine you can take that'll at least let you rest the whole night." She paused and sighed. "I'm going to be frank; you look like shit and this isn't how it was the last time. It looks like you've been digging your nails into your skin at night, and from what I remember, that certainly didn't happen when you had the nightmares at the academy."

His red eyes stared down at his chest in question and a low growl emitted from his throat along with a whispered curse. He shook his head as he told her not to worry about it and removed the sheets from off his body before placing his legs over the side of his bed. Heat slowly rose to her cheeks as she noticed that he was wearing boxers rather than sleep pants, and she whipped her head around before he was able to see the blush. Groaning out, she felt the bed relax as he stood up and the soft thuds of his feet as he walked past her.

It proved difficult to keep her gaze off his rear as he made his way to the bathroom and perverted thoughts shot through her mind. She wondered how it would feel in her grasp. Would there be muscle? Would he flex it immediately at her touch?

He did have a very nice body, and for the last few weeks of their relationship she had vaguely wondered what it would feel like as her hands roamed over him. To have them curling around every curve on his body, tweaking his nipples as she elicited a small moan, or allowing a finger to delicately travel down his happy trail to his…

"I'll be fine, Maka," Soul called from the bathroom, drawing her away from her dirty thoughts. She cursed herself for permitting her mind to wander like that; now wasn't the time to be thinking of having sex with the man. He was going through his own personal shit and she needed to control her hormonal urges. "If it's anything like last time, the nightmares should be gone in a few weeks or so… that's when I'll feel better."

"Are you sure?" She stood up from the bed and walked to the middle of the loft where she crossed her arms, waiting for him to reenter the room. "I really think you should see someone about them. There might be some medication you can take that'll-"

"There isn't," he cut in. "The same thing happened after Wes passed away, but the shit I took for them didn't help. I just have to ride it out until they go away on their own."

He emerged from the bathroom - wearing sleep pants thankfully - and rubbing a towel through his hair. She hadn't even registered that the water was running.

"Did you shower?"

"Nah." Quirking an eyebrow toward the towel in his hand, she slightly questioned it. "Ah, that's because it was already wet and I wanted to tame my hair somewhat."

"Right." She paused and licked her lips. "Did you want to go somewhere? Maybe out to grab a bite to eat or something?"

Soul chewed on his bottom lip as he thought about his answer. In his crimson eyes, she saw the process as it unraveled before her; there was a slight confusion along with the desire to take up her offer. Deep down, she knew what he was going to say before he said it, but she still hoped that the feeling was wrong. It wasn't healthy for him to stay cooped up in his apartment alone. He needed to go out and see the world; there was no sense in hiding from it - from her.

Finally, he shook his head. "I have plenty to eat here, and I'm not really that hungry."

Her heart broke. She was perfectly aware that he had been trying to avoid spending time with her since they left the fortune teller's business, and she didn't know why. It was a silly little fortune that was lie, it wasn't something either of them should be worried about.

"Are you avoiding me because of what the fortune teller said?" she asked. There was no time to beat around the bush when it came to their situation; she had to be blunt and make rash decisions on the spot. This was an affair she wasn't going to let get between them until it built into something worse.

"Y-yes," he said. She caught the hesitation in his voice which tore her heart even more because it meant the decision to lie to her had crossed his mind.

"Soul, I've told you countless times that what she had told us isn't true. I'm not going to be hurt if we stay together, and I'm certainly not going anywhere."

"You don't know that for sure, though," he whispered.

"Yes, I do." She stepped forward and cupped her hands around his cheeks to lift his face up. "I trust and know you better than anyone else. There's no possible way you would let anything hurt me because it's the same thing I would do for you. You protected me from that cyborg when we were younger, you risked your life for me when you didn't have to. Whoever you think you are, that isn't you. Soul. I know you; you're one of the most loyal and bravest people in Death City."

She paused and licked her lips. The next words she wanted to say were on the tip of her tongue, begging to be exposed, but she wasn't positive if it was the right time. Maybe it was something he needed to hear, but would she want to hear it back? What if he didn't feel the same way about her? How embarrassed would she feel for laying her heart out on the table only to have it ignored? Or crushed? Was she ready for that risk?

Her heart told her she was.

"I love you, Soul."

His eyes bulged and she swore she felt his heart skip a beat as his pulse quickened under her touch.

They  _were_ the words he needed to hear.

He didn't say it back, however, but she knew his answer by the way he smiled and kissed her forehead, the way he said her name when he pulled her into a tight embrace. It was all the answer she needed. Maybe he wasn't ready to say the words out loud at the moment, but in time she felt he would. There were things he was guarding - hiding - in his heart that he needed to handle first before he was able to truly open up to her. That was something she was more than positive about.

She only needed to be patient with him.

* * *

He didn't know what to say or if he was even able to say anything. It was wrong for him not to say the words back - it was definitely not something cool guys did - but he was aware in the deepest parts of his heart that it was the right thing. What was he supposed to tell the woman who made his heart ache with affection yet his fingers tingle with the desire to wrap them around her neck? Everything was conflicted when it came to her. His body was telling him two different things, and he wasn't sure which one was more accurate on the matter.

Burying his face into her hair, he discretely sniffed her. The faint scent of vanilla conjured memories of the time they spent together in the academy from the confines of his mind, and his heart started to speed up. There was definitely no one else like her in his life; no one else made his palms sweaty, his mind grow fuzzy, and warmth spread up from the tips of his toes to his fingers. Everything about her was intoxicating, and he wanted to protect her at all costs.

Even if that meant from himself.

There was an evil cackle from the direction of the piano, and Soul inwardly cringed as the demon spoke. "Yes, wouldn't want anything to happen to poor little Maka. Too bad nothing can protect her from you, not even yourself. It's gonna end with either her blood on your hands or yours on hers, we all know that."

"How do you feel about ordering takeout instead of going out?" he asked while reluctantly removing himself from her.

She nodded as he noted the small hurt hidden behind her eyes. Even her smile was weak. "Yeah. That sounds good."

"Great." He withdrew his phone from the back pocket of his pants and started to dial the number of the Chinese restaurant he knew she loved. "The usual?"

"Mhm." She leaned up to gently kiss his cheek, and Soul felt the corners of his mouth tug up. "I'll pay, though."

Chuckling to himself as she made her way to the small kitchen, he said, "of course. Can't let me do everything, now can you?"

"You know me so well," she teased.

About twenty minutes later, their food arrived at the front step of the loft, and as promised, Maka paid for it. They ate their dinner on his couch, downing it with glasses of water that she had filled for them, and watched lame sitcoms on the television sitting in front of it. When they were done, they remained sitting on the couch and Maka snuggled her way against him, his arm lazily draped on the back of the couch.

It felt nice having her that close to him. Her arm was wrapped around his waist - pulling either her closer to him or him closer to her, he wasn't sure - and her side pressed against him brought along warm feelings in the pit of his stomach. They fell into a comfortable silence as they sat on the couch, and Soul felt at peace with her. After a while, Maka's small snores drifted up to his ears and glancing down at her, he saw her chest slowly rising and falling indicating that she had fallen asleep. Smiling to himself, he softly moved back a few strands from her bangs and his heart beat wildly as he watched her.

He did love Maka; he had loved her when they were at the academy and he loved her now after all this time. She made him feel alive. For the first time in the last six years Soul had found the happiness he so desperately craved, but in the back of his mind he knew it was fleeting. The darkness was creeping its way back into his life, and it was only a matter of time before things changed between them.

There were still things he needed to take care of before they could really be together.

"Why do you even care?" came the cackling voice of Oni.

Soul wasn't sure the logistics of his situation, but somehow the little demon that had resided in his head for so many years was now manifesting outside of it. It was mostly around the apartment, but he was still there, reminding Soul of the dangerous, murderous things he was capable of. He hated it; the thought that happiness was not for him - would never be for him - was complete torture and he hated it.

"I care because I love her. We've already gone over this," Soul whispered so as not to wake Maka up.

"We have, yet here we are and she's still here." Oni snickered behind him prompting Soul to glance at the little demon perched on top of his kitchen counter.

"What's your problem?"

"Oh nothing, Soul boy. Just find it funny how you keep her around even though you know exactly how this all ends." He paused and sneered at him. "Would you like me to show you?"

Soul glared at the demon and turned around. "Fuck that. You've shown me it enough. I think I'm good."

Prying himself out of her arms, he placed her head on top of the pillows that rested on the couch and walked over toward the piano bench to sit down. It had been a few nights since he last played the piano. None of the sounds that had escaped it pleased his inner musician or conformed to the teachings he had learned as a child. They were far too eerie and dark for any person who had the right set of ears when it came to the musical earnings of a piano to enjoy. He was more than well acquainted with this small fact.

Pressing down on one of the keys, he tried to play something happier - something that reflected the emotions the woman behind him brought about him. He wanted to recreate the sound of her heart beating steadily against his chest as she laid on top of him, the way her breathing matched his when they were both at peace, and the sound of her voice as it rang in his ears. There were also the emotions he found in himself when she was around; the way his heart skipped several beats upon seeing her for the first time in years, the fire she created in the pit of his stomach by solely being around him, and the way his blood burned beneath his skin with the desire to be with her.

That was what he wanted to perform when he played her song, but instead it was the opposite.

The sound that came out of it sounded distorted and displaced, nothing like the music he had grown up with. When he thought back to the music he played as a child, it was always cheery and uplifting, music that was played in concert halls for the wealthy to listen to. However, now it didn't sound anything like that as it hit his eardrums. It reminded him of the music his father had specifically not to play, the tunes he released when he was feeling down. It was horrible even to him, not at all suited for the woman behind him.

"This is complete shit," he whispered to himself as he pounded down on the keys with his elbows.

Resting his head in his hands, he combed his fingers through his hair and let out a frustrated groan. It was a useless game - he knew that - but he continued to strive for perfection. She deserved that much.

So he tried again. Closing his eyes, he tried to call upon the emotions he felt when Maka was with him, the ones that reminded him everything was perfect when she was around. His fingers flew across the ivory keys, playing the music that flowed through his soul and body. There was still a melancholy undertone, but he also heard the soft, loving tune that mingled with it. They formed a song that was comforting and inviting, one that warmed his insides and brought a smile on his face.

Somehow he had written a song that was perfectly them wound up together within it. Maybe if they weren't meant to be, their love could live on in the song. No matter what happened to either of them - no matter how their destinies ended - maybe the love they felt for each was able to live on in a song. When others played it in concert halls, the audience might feel the affections that were intertwined within it and wonder about their tragic love story.

Soul felt his answer to their relationship was hidden within the notes that emitted from the piano, and his throat tightened as he fought back the tears.

There was only one solution to his problem.

* * *

She didn't know she had fallen asleep until the soft sounds of music and a television woke her up. Squeezing the pillow that her arms were wrapped around tighter to her chest, Maka stretched out on the couch and rolled over onto her back so that she was staring up at the ceiling. Hours had passed since she came over to Soul's apartment as the city lights shone above her. The various colors that projected off the stained glass window danced above her and she smiled.

It was calming and beautiful as they moved to the sound of a piano playing. They reminded her of the recitals she used to attend with her father; how the ballerinas danced on stage to the rhythm of a concert band. Closing her eyes, she listened to the sound, her ears picking up on certain key tones like when the tempo picked up just the slightest or the small breaths that escaped from the pianist's mouth.

Her eyes snapped open as realization struck.

It wasn't a dream she was having, she was listening to someone actually playing, and that the person behind it was in fact her boyfriend. Pushing herself up from the couch, she pressed her palms into the cushion and observed him. His back muscles moved with each pound of the key like small ripples in the water, and sweat glistened on his neck allowing her to come to the conclusion that he had been at it for a while.

She swung her legs over the couch and shortened the distance between them, standing behind him as he continued playing. He must have really been in the zone because he didn't even side glance her when she sat down. Watching his fingers glide across the keys, she marveled at how easy playing came to him; the way the music escaped him seemed natural, like a sixth sense. There had only been one other time when she had seen him like that: when they flew Grigori for the first time. Exactly like flying, the music he played came from deep within his heart.

Soul finished his song, and his slowly pried open, staring out at the city beyond the windows. The lights from below glittered in his burgundy eyes, reminding her of the stars that shone down in the sky above them. He was beautiful as he sat beside her, and she almost didn't want to disturb him.

Almost.

Cautiously, she reached out her hand to gently lay it on top of his, and Soul's attention snapped to her, wide red eyes staring at her in disbelief.

"You're awake." It wasn't a question.

"Your playing woke me up."

"Right, sorry about that. It sorta just happened. Didn't mean to wake you."

She shook her head. "No, it's okay. I thought your song was beautiful. It was really soothing and nice."

He let out a strangled laugh as he turned back toward the window. "Says the person who doesn't know the first thing about music." His tongue flicked out to wet his lips. "That was soothing or nice or beautiful; it was complete shit. It's the type of song that would make my dad yell at me and call me a disgrace of a fucking son."

"Then he's the one who doesn't know a thing about music."

"Maka, he's been playing music since he was three, he was the youngest violinist to get accepted into a symphony, and he's now a conductor for one of the most prestigious symphonies in the world. I'm pretty sure he knows everything about music."

"Why do you even care what your father thinks about your music? You should only care about what you feel when you play, and you shouldn't try to set your up to someone else's standards or accomplishments." She squeezed his hand and smiled at him when he looked at her. "You're a good pianist no matter what your father thinks, and I'm sure there are other musicians out there who would agree with me."

"Why do you have to be so optimistic about everything?"

"Because if I'm not, then you certainly won't be." Releasing his hand, she snuggles up to him and wrapped her arm around his waist to pull him closer to her. "You're one of the best pianists I know."

"You must not know very many."

"Soul," she growled. She loosened her hold on him and glared. "For once in your life take a damn compliment."

His smile was small and weak, but the loving glint in his eyes told a different story. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

Hesitantly for the briefest of moments, she leaned up and gently pressed her lips to his in a chaste kiss before drawing away.

* * *

He didn't want to kiss her nor did he want the compliment for his playing; it wasn't the right time or the right place. His mind had been focused on other things, trying to listen to her while the devil sat beside him on the other side whispering to him. The urge to slice her throat open had been strong as she sat beside him, his fingers had even twitched when she hugged herself to him. It was proving to be more dangerous the longer he remained with her, and he wasn't sure what he should do.

His heart was hiding secrets from her – secrets that were originally meant to protect her but were now putting her life in the line of danger.

"You know exactly what you have to do, don't you?" Oni whispered in his ear. "Either kill her now when it's only the two of you or wait for a later time when other people around. It's your choice really. Although, we both know which is better, now don't we?"

Soul stood up from the bench, not wanting to listen to the little demon anymore and walked to the middle of the apartment. He chewed on his nails as he faintly heard Maka trying to talk to him from he had left her, but Oni's words were louder. They grated his nerves and ran across his skin like fire; he physically felt himself starting to change, the darkness from within opening up to swallow his heart. His vision started to cloud over as all he saw was red, but he tried to fight it.

He tried to remember the man he was – the man he had always been – but it was no use.

"Soul, are you okay?" He felt Maka place her hand on the small of his back, and he whirled around to snarl at her.

"What the fuck are you still doing here?"

She stared up at him confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Why can't you see that I'm dangerous for you?!" He stormed across the room to where a large mirror was situated on the wall and looked at his reflection. His eyes were pitch black, his teeth actually looked like fangs, and his nails had grown into razor sharp claws.

"Look at me, Maka!" He gestured to his body before continuing. "Can't you see that I'm a fucking monster? Everyone else can, so why can't you?! I'm dangerous for you! I've told you and I'm sure every other goddamn person in this town has too."

"Soul, what are you talking about? You aren't a monster! Seriously, where is everyone getting this idea from? And why haven't you told me anything since I came here? You've been keeping a secret from me and it's been eating at you, I can tell it has. So why don't you just spare the dramatics and tell me already?"

Confused, he glanced at himself in the mirror one last time and then back at her. It didn't make any sense, why the hell was she still in his loft? Any sane person would have run out of there like a bat out of hell, yet she stayed. That was something he was going to stand for, so he braced himself and finally did what he should have done weeks ago.

"For fuck's sake, Maka, stop being a stupid ass little girl and leave me alone already! If everyone and their mother has told you that I'm dangerous, then you should fucking listen to them! Why do you stay around? Is it because you think I love? Because I don't, Maka!" He swallowed the lump in his throat and ignored the ache in his heart. "The kiss was a fucking mistake and it never should have happened. I shouldn't have even met you when you came to Death City. Our entire relationship was a mistake."

His words didn't seem to reach her, however, as she remained standing there gaping at him. "What are you saying?"

"I'm breaking up with you! That's what I'm saying! I don't love you, and I wish you would leave me the fuck alone already! I was perfectly fine before you ever came into my life!"

She opened her mouth to say more, but closed right away. He watched as she swallowed her pride and simply nodded. "If that's how you really feel, then I'll leave. Goodbye, Soul."

Not sparing him a second glance, she walked toward the door and left the loft.

Looking back in the mirror, he saw that his features were back to normal, and the little demon cackled at his stunned expression. "You fucking son of a bitch!" he snarled. "You made me believe that I was actually turning, didn't you?!"

"It worked, though, right? I was able to finally get rid of that little bitch."

"You fucking—"

Soul stepped toward him as if to strangle him, but dropped his hands as the reality of his situation hit him. He didn't mean to say those things to Maka; none of them were true. He loved her more than any other person in the world and wanted to be with her for the rest of his life. They weren't a mistake, nothing that had happened between them had been a mistake.

He turned around and walked toward the door, his hand grasping the doorknob to throw it open and rush after her, but nothing happened. What was he supposed to tell the girl whose heart he had just broken? What decent woman was going to take back someone who told her he never loved her? Maka was the type of person who saw the good in everyone, but she wasn't the type of person to easily forgive him for the things he had said to her.

"What have I done?" he whispered.

* * *

Maka slammed the door behind her and leaned against the wood as she tried to process what had just happened. It didn't make sense to her. One minute Soul was fine and the next he was acting like a madman. The whole ordeal had been confusing to her. She didn't understand what he meant when he said he was monster and then he had gestured to himself like he was one…

It didn't make sense.

The only thing that did seem logical to her was the fact that he didn't love her anymore.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, Maka pushed herself off the door and left the apartment building forever. If Soul didn't want to see her ever again, then she was going to abide by his wishes. It didn't make sense to continue loving someone who obviously didn't give two shits about her and how she felt. No matter how much it hurt her, she was going to have to move on from Soul and settle with someone who wasn't as great as the man who truly held her heart.


	7. Burn This Out

After breaking up with Maka, Soul fell back into his old habits. He hardly went out, found more excuses to drink, and spent most of his time moping around his loft. He didn't want to see her hurt and upset because of him; he was mostly afraid that if he did see her, he'd try to make things right between them. Part of him wanted to make amends, but another part of him knew he couldn't. He had been risking Maka's life every second they were together, and not being in her life was better for both of them. He only wished his heart felt the same way.

A few weeks after their breakup, he grew tired of being in his loft and eating the same meal every night, so he went down to the diner. He should have known better; he was the one who introduced her to the place, and he should have expected she'd still go there. However, the thought never crossed his mind until he stepped through the doors.

His eyes trained on her like a magnet, and his heart stopped. There she was, sitting with Black Star and Tsubaki. Her eyes lit up and sparkled as she laughed at something the man had said, her chuckles sounded like bells as they hit his ears. He wanted to apologize to her as regret boiled up his throat, but he didn't. Instead, he turned away from her and walked to the counter to order his food. He spent his time waiting flipping through the menu or forcing himself to make small talk with the waitress there. None of it felt natural, and he knew Maka would be able to notice if she were watching him, but he didn't care. It was busy work to keep him away from her.

His food came, he paid for it, and turned to leave, but his attention was automatically drawn back to Maka. She was already staring at him as their eyes met. Soul felt like she wanted to tell him something, but saw the hesitation in her body. She was close to getting up and walking over to him which wasn't good. He didn't want to talk to her about anything; they - he - needed to keep his distance from her. So instead of waiting around to see what she would do, Soul left.

He knew the small gesture wounded her, but it was necessary. Being away from Maka was the only way he could protect her from himself.

* * *

If Maka said her heart didn't break when Soul left the diner without even a single word to her, she'd be lying.

The door to the diner closed, and she sighed as she turned back to Tsubaki and Black Star. She was partly at fault here too; she hadn't even bothered to get up and talk to him when she saw him walk in. She didn't have to wait for him to talk to her first, they weren't living in the 1800's, and a woman was perfectly capable of doing things before the man. However, she was stunned when he walked in; what was she supposed to say to the man who had broken her heart? She still loved him - that was the worst part - even though he had said so many nasty things to her a few weeks ago, but something told her he didn't mean any of it. Soul loved her that much she knew to be true.

"Maka." Black Star pulled her from her reverie, and she met his pale green eyes. "Don't tell me you're still hung up on that bastard. After what he said to you, I thought you'd have more sense and forget about him. There are a shit ton of better guys out there for you. He's not the only one, you know?"

"Black Star," Tsubaki chastised. "I told you to stay out of this."

He ignored his fiancee and continued. "I've told you, Soul isn't the same guy we knew back at the academy. He's darker and more aggressive than ever. I knew he had a bad side, but I didn't know it was as bad as it is now. You know there's a rumor going around the academy that he-"

"Black Star!" Maka quickly looked over at her friend, and backed away slightly. She had never seen Tsubaki look so angry before. Her normally calm features were scrunched up and she reminded Maka of a ferocious lioness ready to pounce. "You know it isn't your place to say anything! If Soul wanted to tell her, then he would have. You need to let him be the one to tell her the truth.."

Maka's eyes drifted back over to Black Star. He was twirling the clear liquid in his glass, his mouth pouting, and she knew they were on a more serious subject. She had spent most of her time for the last few weeks with the couple - walking around the city and seeing sights she hadn't seen with Soul - and their time together was always more joyful. They joked and teased each other (mostly her and Black Star while Tsubaki watched) and never strayed away from being playful with each other. However, sitting across from him, there was a different atmosphere floating around, and Maka noted that she only felt it when Soul was in the same vicinity as him.

"Yeah, I know that." Star took a swig of his drink, and set the glass back down on the table. "But Soul hasn't grown a pair and told her the truth, has he? And then he goes and breaks her fucking heart, what kind of noble man does that? If he really loved Maka, he would have told her the truth from the beginning; both about his feelings for her and what he did."

"He probably had a good reason not to," Maka said. She didn't like that he had basically told her he didn't love her after he had already kissed her, but she also didn't like how Star talked about their old friend. "It's not like you haven't kept secrets from me since I came back. If you ask me, I'd say it takes one to know one. You've warned me about Soul, but you haven't told me why you find the need to do so. Is that what a noble man does when he's trying to protect his friend?"

"It's different with Soul and I. Me as a friend can only tell you so much before you ignore me and go retreating back to him. You wouldn't believe what I told you about him, even if I gave you proof. You'd have to hear it from him, not me. That's why I didn't tell you. Plus, your head's all mushy with love when it comes to him."

Maka pounded her fist on the table, drawing attention to their table from the other patrons. When she spoke, she tried to sound as calm as possible, but her face remained angry. "I am not blinded by love when it comes to Soul. I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions, and I don't need justification to believe something you tell me."

"Ha, could have fooled me with the way you were drooling over him just a while ago."

"That doesn't mean anything," Maka growled.

"If you're going to tell her, then just do it, Black Star! Enough of this beating around the bush business. You've been wanting to tell her for quite some time now, so do it already." Tsubaki's voice and facial expression had calmed down from earlier.

Maka was thankful that her friend finally put what was on her own mind out on the table. She was tired of Black Star dropping hints to what Soul was capable of instead of flat out telling her.

Star scoffed and leaned back in the booth, crossing his arms in front of him. Nodding his head toward Maka he asked, "Is that what you want? You want me to come out and just tell you?"

"I've been telling you to do that since you first told me he was dangerous."

The man smirked and leaned on the table so that he was closer to Maka. "Fine. Since you wanna know so badly, I'll tell." Maka inwardly groaned. Sometimes Star could be a really jackass. "The rumor with the Spartoi members is that he  _killed_ Wes."

Maka wasn't sure what she was expecting him to say, but it wasn't that.

Her heart dropped at his words, and she leaned back in the booth in astonishment. She closed her eyes, trying to make sense of the matter, but couldn't. Nothing about Soul killing Wes added up. Her emotions were going haywire; she was angry at Soul for not telling her, felt sorry that he had to live with that, mourned Wes' death even more, and most importantly, she denied it. She didn't want to believe that Soul had done something like that. She knew him; the way he spoke and praised his older brother told her he loved him more than he anything, and would never hurt him - or kill him - unless something else was in the mix.

She lightly shook her head and opened her eyes. "It's not true, though."

Star fell back with a loud thunk and exasperatedly sighed. "See, I tell you the truth, and then you deny it."

"I'm not denying it! You said it yourself; it's only a rumor."

"It doesn't make it any less true."

"Rumors are mostly lies fabricated because people don't know the truth. Has anyone ever asked Soul if it was true? I doubt it since no one's talked to him in six years!"

"There's a reason for that too," Star huffed.

"And what reason would that be?"

It wasn't Black Star who answered her question, but Tsubaki. The dark haired woman side glanced her fiance before looking at Maka. "A couple days after Soul came back from his mission, he had to clean out his locker, and some of the guys were in there. Star thought it would be funny to tease Soul, and he sorta…"

Tsubaki trailed off, looking at Star to finish the rest. "Soul pinned me to the ground and tried to choke me to death. It took both Ox and Kilik about five minutes just to get him off of me." Star rubbed his hand along the side of his neck. "Still feel his hands around me too when he's anywhere near me. You know he even had the decency to tell me he blacked out? Fucking bastard making up excuses for himself. I should kick his ass one of these days, but I'm better than that."

Maka allowed Star to cool down some before asking the next question burning on the tip of her tongue. "And that's why you all ditched him?"

"Well, yeah. What'd you expect us to do? Pretend everything was all hunky dory, and continue on with our lives? He tried to kill me, and he  _supposedly_ killed his brother. I've told you, Soul isn't the good guy here."

All throughout the conversation, Maka felt her blood boiling. It shouldn't have mattered what the rumor was or what he had done; Soul was their friend, and they should have forgiven him. They should have realized that the Soul they knew would never do anything to hurt anyone. In all the time that Maka knew Soul, he never once purposefully harmed anyone. There was the small incident during the academy when he was ready to hurt Star, but he had been provoked and was going through mental issues by himself. Soul wasn't in the right frame of mind during any of that - even the events that she hadn't been there personally to witness. Deep down she was positive that he would have a decent story if they had only asked.

She abruptly stood up, dug in her purse for some money, and threw it onto the table.

"Where are you going?" Star asked.

"I'm going home. I don't wanna hear any more of your stories. If none of you had the decency to even ask him if he was okay, then I don't want to be around any of you."

Star grabbed her arm before she could get too far. "Maka, wait-"

"No!" She yanked her arm from his grasp and glared down at him. "It's no wonder Soul was always around me when I came back. His friends ditched him and never bothered to make amends. You and everyone else is just as guilty as Soul here."

And with that, she left.

They were all jerks, every last one of them. She was positive that Soul would never do that without an explanation. If he said he blacked out, then she would have believed him. From the moment they met, she knew what he craved the most in life was friends, and he would never do anything to damage that. He had found friendship in not only her but everyone else, and what happened? She was stationed in another division, and Ox, Kilik, Star, Tsubaki, everyone all deserted him after his brother's death. No one should have to go through that alone, and if she had known, she would have flown back as soon as possible.

Her heart ached for Soul and the turmoil he had been through, and somehow she found herself outside of his apartment building. Her mind must have lead her there while she was blinded by anger, but she couldn't go up to see him. The way he looked at her at the diner told her enough she needed to know; he didn't care about her anymore, yet her heart still pined for him. But what hurt the most was the fact that he was up there in his apartment, alone, and probably moping around. She would give anything to join him and comfort him somehow, but she didn't.

Instead, she pulled her jacket closer around her body, and went home.

Only in her dreams would he ever want her again.

* * *

Taking one final swig of his drink, Soul tossed the bottle in the trash can nearby, and plopped down on one of the couches. He leaned back on the plush seating, closed his eyes, and waited for the fog in his brain to disappear. Drinking had become a sort of safety net for him throughout the years, and he couldn't really think of any other ways to cure his depression. It was a bad habit to turn to, he knew that, but it was the only way he could get through his issues. After countless sleepless nights following Wes' death, he had to turn to other options when it came to recuperating; he wouldn't let his past mistakes take over his life again.

Heaving a large sigh, he raised his hand to his temples, and tried to rub away the throbbing headache there. Maybe he was an idiot for getting mad at Maka, but he was cutting it close, far too close. The darkness was drawing him back in, and being with Maka was dangerous. What if he had turned on one of their dates? What if he blacked out like he did with Black Star, and tried to choke her? What if she couldn't overpower him and it went too far? Too long?

He couldn't live with himself if he killed  _her_.

"Why are you so afraid of getting close to Maka? I thought you loved her," came a voice beside him.

Soul recognized the voice, but he didn't want to open his eyes to confirm his suspicions. Out of all the times he had to come back, he chose now to? What about all the pastimes Soul had called out for him, and asked him to give him some wisdom during his time of need? Where was he then? Nowhere.

"Are you going to answer my question or keep ignoring me?" the voice asked.

Dropping his hand, and opening his eyes, Soul glanced to the figure next to him. "Why do you come now? Where were you when I needed you?" His voice began to rise and shake with anger; the tears pricking the back of his eyes. Fuck, why did he have to drink? He was always a blubbering mess when he did, he should have known better. "Where were you when you died, Wes? I needed you then, but you never came! Now that Maka's back, all of a sudden you appear? What the fuck? I thought I was your brother!"

Wes closed his eyes, and somberly shook his head. "Little brother, that isn't why I'm here, and you know that. Something else has been bothering you; something that goes farther back than when Maka came back."

Soul's jaw tensed; he knew exactly what Wes was referring to. "That has nothing to do with Maka."

"My point exactly, but unfortunately she does have something to do with it now. What are you not admitting to her?" Wes raised one blonde eyebrow as he questioned his brother.

"The accident isn't any of Maka's business, and you know it," Soul growled.

Sighing Wes said, "but it is. At least when it comes to you it is. You haven't been honest with her. That's why you broke up with her. You need to tell her what happened, Soul. What are you so afraid of?"

He breathed out heavily through his nose, and chewed the inside of his cheek before answering. "You know exactly what I'm afraid of, Wes… or you would had you been there after the accident."

"Then tell me, Soul. It doesn't do good to keep your feelings inside, you should know that."

Soul took a few minutes before speaking again, trying to decide the best way to put his feelings into words. Even now, he found it difficult to lie to his brother; even his dead brother could see how he truly felt, and it disgusted him.

"I don't want Maka to see me as a monster… I don't want her to look at me the same way Spirit and Lord Death did when I told them what happened. I don't want to disappoint her."

"That's not the only reason, is it?"

Soul licked his lips. No, that wasn't the whole truth. Her viewing him as a monster wasn't the only reason he had ended things.

"I can't be with Maka because I can't protect her from myself." It came out quieter than he had intended. His heart pounded in his chest; he wasn't sure if it was because of the alcohol or the fact that he was admitting the truth. "If I lose control, she'll die."

His voice caught on the last two words, and he had to close his eyes to prevent the tears from falling. They sat in silence, and Soul knew he had failed in keeping the tears at bay when he felt the moisture slide down his cheeks. He cursed himself for being weak, and pathetic. This wasn't the type of person he was, nor was it the type of person he had wanted to become, but the truth hurt. Maka was the most important person in his life, and he wanted her to admire and love him. He wanted her to be in his life, healthy and alive, instead of cold and dead. If he killed her, he wouldn't be able to live with that.

He steadied his breathing for a couple minutes, before turning back to his brother. Wes remained stoic; waiting for his younger brother's inner monsters to surface.

After a few more minutes, Wes spoke again. "You need to tell her." He paused. "You need to tell her the truth, and trust that she'll still accept you. Maka isn't like her father, nor is she like Lord Death, and you would never do anything to hurt her. You know that." Wes gently placed his hand over Soul's heart. "You know what I'm saying is true. You can feel it in here, and you know what the right thing to do is. That's why you've been having so much trouble lately. Not only do you need to accept what you did, but you also need to be honest with Maka. Once you do that, I think you'll find it easier to forgive yourself."

Wes was dead, that was a given fact. He saw his brother die; he killed his brother. Wes' blood was on his hands. So what exactly was this new entity? Was he dreaming or was he really  _that_ out of it?

He stared at the hallucination; that was the only explanation for it right now.

However, none of that mattered because the things Wes had just told him were true. Soul knew it deep down in his soul. He needed to come clean with Maka; it was the only way they could be together.

"You're right," he heard himself say. "I need to tell her. She deserves to know."

Glancing over at the spot where his brother was before, he found it empty once again; his suspicions of Wes being a hallucination confirmed. He didn't expect the realization that his brother wasn't really there to hurt so much. Wes' death had a much bigger impact on him than he was willing to admit, but it was a fact he needed to face.

Sighing, he grabbed his phone, searched for Maka's number, and called her.

* * *

It felt like it took her hours to pick up, and when she did, he asked if she could come over so they could talk things out. He didn't want to explain  _everything_ in the phone call so he had to be as vague as possible; he also secretly hoped that she would say no so he would have an excuse to avoid his problems. Unfortunately, Maka's response was the complete opposite. When they hung up, he only had about twenty minutes to sober up some, and make his place appear at least half decent.

Pushing himself off the couch, he looked at all the discarded beer bottles that littered his floor from the weeks he spent moping around; even the air, which smelled like bubbly piss, made him feel nauseas. He walked over to his refrigerator to drink a few of the bottles of water he had stashed in there, hoping that would subdue the foggy buzz running around in his head. Afterwards, he started to clear out the beer bottles by throwing them in the trash, and tried to remove the stench with a couple candles he had bought a while back.

He didn't have to wait too long for Maka because as soon as he finished lighting the second candle, he heard a soft knock on the door. Placing the candle back down on the end table, he walked over and answered it. His heart stopped upon seeing Maka, and he had to catch his breath and restrain himself from pulling her into a hug. Soul hadn't realized until then how much he missed her. Her hair wasn't pulled back in a half ponytail like usual; instead it was all down, framing her face beautifully that made his heart go wild. Five weeks was far too long for him to be away from her.

"Hey," he breathed out.

"Hey," she smiled. She bit her bottom lip, and looked down causing her bangs to drape over her eyes to make her even more alluring. After a while of standing in silence, she looked up, and asked, "may I come in?"

He nodded, and stepped aside to allow her to enter. Closing the door, he watched as she stood in the middle of his loft, glancing around at all his familiar belongings she had seen countless times before, until finally turning back around to him. His heart stopped as he marveled at how gorgeous she looked. Besides the candles and the light from the city below them, there were no other lights on in the loft, giving her an eerie attractiveness. He had seen her in the same outfit countless times before, but tonight he wanted nothing more to have her completely.

But there was still some baggage he needed to get rid of before that could happen.

She cleared her throat, drawing his attention back to her face. "What exactly did you want to talk about?"

Instinctively, he raised his hand to rub behind his neck; it was his tell that he was nervous, and she had known him long enough that it was shared knowledge between them. "I think you-we should sit down for this."

He gestured to the couch, and she followed his lead as they both sat down. Rubbing his sweaty palms on his pant legs, Soul could feel the familiar static rising in his body as his anxiety started to kick in. He knew this would be hard, but was it really going to be  _this_ hard? He needed to get his anxiety in order before starting anything, so he began doing the breathing exercises his therapist had taught him. Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out.

He continued doing this for a couple minutes, hoping Maka wouldn't notice, before he felt any sort of affect. It wasn't much, but his heart had slowed down a beat and the anxiety wasn't growing as rapidly as before. Maybe he could do this. All he had to do was imagine that she wasn't in the room; that he was alone, practicing what he was going to tell her. Now that he thought about it, he should have practiced before she came over.

"So," she drawled, finally breaking the silence. "What did you want to talk about?"

He turned to look at her, and came face to face with wide green eyes immediately. His heart jumped, not expecting her to be watching and waiting for him to speak.

Soul turned away again before speaking. "Right, the thing I need to talk to you about." His back began to ache as the words in his brain left him, and he could feel his heart starting to race again. How was he going to explain what happened to Wes to her? He couldn't do this. What had he even been thinking earlier? Why did he even call her? Maka didn't need to know about this? It was silly; it was entirely unnecessary and he-

Maka must have been able to read the anxiety radiating off his body because she placed one hand delicately on his knee, and squeezed. When he looked back at her; his eyes creating a path from her small hand up her arm until they met green again. Maka's eyebrows were cinched together, the worry line more prominent than ever, and the corners of her mouth were pulled down.

"Soul, what is it? You can tell me anything," she whispered.

Her voice was so sincere, and every last syllable that hit his ears was filled with love, and warmth it made something inside of him break. He could hear the faint shattering sound somewhere deep in his body as something broke through the darkness. He didn't know what it was exactly, but it felt like it was something good; it  _had_ to be something good. His anxiety slowly started to float away as the warmth and love took its place, and Soul finally felt free to tell Maka the truth.

"Maka, when I told you about Wes' death, I wasn't completely honest with you," he began.

Her face went from worried to confused instantly. "What do you mean you weren't honest with me? You said there was an accident, and that was it. What more is there?"

He shook his head. "No, that was only partially true. There was an accident, but… but it was my fault."

"Soul, it wasn't your fault. I know it's perfectly normal to blame yourself but-"

He placed a hand on her shoulder to quiet her. "Let me finish, okay?" She closed her mouth, and nodded. Taking a deep breath, he continued.

…

Soul and Wes enter the ruins, the exact same ones that Soul had visited with Maka only a few months prior. He felt uncomfortable and out of place as they walk into the ruins; they were meant to search them and gather evidence for something only Wes knew about. Soul knows he should have asked Lord Death what they were searching for, but his brother had prevented him from doing so by ushering him out the office as quickly as possible.

The stench from before wafts up his nose, but something's different this time around. His body slowly starts to get tingly, and the confines of his mind get darker as his vision clouds over. There's a faint roaring in his ears, and he can't sense anything that's around him. He sees himself dropping the lantern in his hand and Wes rushing forward as Soul drops to his knees, but there's no sound. It feels like someone is taking over his body, pushing him out; suddenly, Soul isn't in his body anymore. He's floating in the ruins, watching as Wes tries to figure out what's wrong with him.

"Soul." Wes slaps his brother's face; his eyes are closed, but he's still breathing which is always good. "Soul, can you hear me? Are you alright?"

Wes gently lays Soul's body on the ground, and stands up to comb his hands through his hair. "Shit, this isn't good. I need to find that monster before any other citizens get hurt. Fuck."

While Wes worries about finishing the mission, Soul watches his body slowly start to stir; his fingers begin to twitch, and moans fall from his mouth as he flips himself onto his stomach to hack up black blood. His body pushes itself up, and Soul notices the haunting eyes; they aren't crimson, they're pitch black. The devilish grin his body throws at him, makes the fear rise, and Soul doesn't know how to tell his brother to watch out as his body bends down to pick up a rock. He knows what's about to happen before it does, but he can't avert his eyes even if he tries.

His body turns, walking toward Wes who's still oblivious to what's going on, and raises the rock high in the air. Soul shouts out to his brother, but his words go unheard. They don't echo in the ruins, and Soul is forced to watch as the rock hits upside Wes' head, knocking him to the ground.

But his body doesn't stop there.

It bends down, releasing a horrific scream before bringing the rock back down on Wes' face; his body continuously bashes the rock against his brother, not caring that he died seconds ago. Dark blood splatters against the ruins walls, staining the gold material, until his brother's face is no longer recognizable. He doesn't have much time to take in the scene before him, as his body falls limp, and Soul finds himself back in it.

At first he feels dazed, but then the memory of what he say comes back and he starts panicking as he pushes himself off Wes' cold body. He doesn't want to believe it at first, but the fact that Wes is no longer moving changes that. Soul feels the hot tears pricking his eyes as he looks away from his brother's mangled face, and bile crawls up his throat.

His brother is dead, and he's the one who did it.

His brother is dead, and it's his fault.

His brother is dead.

…

He paused, offering a side glance to her, and noted how stunned she looked. Soul let out a shaky breath, and leaned back on the couch. "I think that's all I need to say about that. You get the gist of it, I'm sure."

Keeping his eyes on Maka, he watched as she turned away from him, letting his words sink in and allowing her mind to sort through their meaning. It shouldn't be hard to figure out; he had told her as much as she needed to know. He didn't need to go in full detail on the matter, nor did she need to know anymore. It was enough to suffice, and her imagination was broad enough that she could fill in the blanks herself. Maka stood up, bringing her hands up to her stomach, and clutching them there. His questions burned on the tip of his tongue as he waited for to say something - he needed her to say something. Did she think of him as a monster? Would she leave him? What was going through that thick skull of hers?

"So you were the one who killed Wes?" she asked after a few minutes.

Leaning his body forward, Soul rested his elbows on his knees, and ran his hands through his hair. This was it; this was the moment she would make her final verdict about him. "Yes. I killed Wes."

"But why? I know you, Soul, and that's not who you are. You loved Wes, I know you did. The way you spoke about him, even though you would never admit it, you worshipped him. Why-why would you kill him?"

Soul knew why, but he didn't want to tell Maka that. Hearing her shift her feet, Soul glanced up, and met her eyes. He saw the concern and worry etched in them, and he knew he had to tell her. If he was going to be completely honest with her and have a real relationship with her, he had to do it.

"It was the darkness."

Maka cocked her head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"Remember the ruins?" She nodded. "When that cyborg slashed me across the chest, it woke up a monster that hadn't been present in my life for some time. It's been inside me ever since, but it was nowhere near as bad as it was when I was around Wes. After graduation, it only became worse to the point where I couldn't control it anymore. I guess you could say my last mission was the breaking point, and I lost control."

He watched Maka's facial expression for reassurance of what she would do next. Her eyes were unfocused as she concentrated on something beyond him. She was trying to figure the meaning behind his words as she rolled her bottom lip between her teeth. Soul could see the cogs turning in her brain as she tried to come to a reasonable conclusion for his story.

The fear and anxiety slowly crept its ugly face around the corner as the thought of her leaving him crossed his mind. As soon as his words sunk in, there was no doubt in his mind that she was going to think he was a monster and leave him exactly like everyone else had. He started to regret telling her the truth of what he had done; what was the use in telling her the truth if she was only going to leave him? The thought broke his heart, and Soul braced himself for the worst.

"So what does that have to do with you and me?"

He blinked and looked up at her. "What do you mean?"

"What does the darkness, and Wes have to do with you and me? Is this why you broke up with me?"

"Yeah, but I had a good reason for that."

"And what reason would that be? Because you killed your brother?"

"Yes!" Soul stood up from the couch so that he was towering over her. "Maka did you not hear what I just told you? I killed Wes, with my bare hands. What if I did the same thing to you? What then? I'd have another dead body on my conscious, and another person haunting my dreams. I can't live with that. I needed to end things with you before the darkness took over, and I did something I'd regret."

She crossed her arms, and glared at him. "So you think I'm weak? Soul, I can handle myself when it comes to you. I can read you like a book, you know that. I would be able to tell when you changed."

"No. No you wouldn't have, Maka." He ran his hands through his hair and heavily breathed out. "You don't know how the darkness takes over me. I'm not the same person when it happens. I get more aggressive, and I can't control myself. I fucking choked Star once because I couldn't control it! It took both Kilik  _and_ Ox to remove me from him! It took two grown ass men to pry me away from Star, and you think you can handle me yourself? Maka, you're not that strong!"

"What does it matter, Soul? I know you - that's what matters - and you would never hurt me! You love me, I know you do! All the time we spent together, you never once raised your hand to me! You never once tried to hurt me or anything. Star warned me to be careful, but you never gave me a reason to do so."

"But Maka-"

"No, stop!" She took a step forward and placed her hand over his heart. "I know, okay? The person in here," she pounded her palm against his chest, "is who you are. I know who you truly are, and I'm not afraid of being with you. I love you, I love you so much, and I would do anything for you."

It was her last words that completely shattered him from the inside out. He felt it vibrate through every fiber in his body, and he finally saw the light shining at the end of the tunnel. Something had broken through the darkness that was boiling up inside of him, and he had a good feeling of what it could be as the warmth from Maka's hand seeped in through his shirt. His heart constricted, and he almost forgot how to breathe as he stared down into her soothing green eyes. Soul saw everything in there; he saw her love, the way she saw him, how she would always be by him no matter what, and so much more.

It was exactly what he needed, and his next actions couldn't be controlled even if he tried.

He cupped her face between his hands and leaned down to gently lay his lips on hers. Maka squeaked in surprised, but didn't take long to react. Slanting her head a bit and snaking her arms around his neck, she took his bottom lip between hers and lightly sucked on it. She tugged him closer to her. Their bodies molded together as she pressed up against him and deepening the kiss while Soul's hands found their way to her hips. Having her that close made his pants feel a little tighter.

It was one of their best kisses to date as the rush of heat and electricity rushed from the pit of his stomach throughout the rest of his body. Her lips felt like fire as they moved against his, and her tongue was forceful as it slid against his, his groan vibrating around it as his grip tightened around her. Her hands gently tugged on his hair when she pulled him away to breathe before going back; her heavy lidded eyes gazed into his, allowing him to feel the lust emitting from them. It was completely exhilarating, and all he needed in life; it was all uniquely Maka, and he needed more of it.

They broke apart, their cheeks flushed and their breathing mixed together. Soul rested his forehead on her's and smiled.

"That was-"

"Yeah."

He didn't need to explain what that kiss was like; it was different from their other ones. He wasn't holding back anymore since he had laid all his cards out on the table, and Maka hadn't deserted him. There was nothing holding him back from being with her anymore.

"I love you," he whispered.

He heard her inhale sharply, startled by his sudden admission. "I love you, too." He felt the smile playing around her voice, and the flame in his stomach burned with more intensity.

Soul gently placed kisses down her face, making Maka giggle in the process, and maneuvered them over to his bed. They fell on his bed and spent most of their night getting reacquainted with the other.

He marveled at the contrast of their skin as he moved above her; the way his hands stood out as they rested over her stomach, blocking some of her skin from view. Her kisses felt like fire as she peppered them along his skin, branding him as hers for the world to see. Her touch was like a bundle of electric shocks as her hands roamed his body, memorizing it as if he were a constellation in the sky.

It was new and exciting. There was no one else in the world he wanted.

The way his name left her lips when he touched a sensitive spot on her body sent shivers down his spine. Her nails scraped his back and left red secrets along his skin, leaving crescent moons as they dug into him. Moans mingled together before evaporating into the silent night. They were two different people coming together to make something that was uniquely their own, something the rest of the world would never be able to replicate. Her body shook as she came around him, whispering his name like a promise. His own release wasn't far behind as the tips of his ears tingled and his toes curled before falling unceremoniously on top of her.

They made love twice that night before sleep took them both. The moon was bright and full as it shone down on the rest of Death City, and the stars twinkled in their places along the skyline. The world continued to move, not realizing that a couple had become one. However, that was how they liked it. Neither Soul nor Maka needed to shout out into the abyss that they were back together or about their actions that night. It was a silent secret between them.


	8. Winds of Change

The next morning, Maka woke up to the sun shining in through the stained glass window, casting colorful shadows along her face. Normally it would have bothered her, but today it didn't. The memory of last night flashed in her mind, and a small smile crept onto her face. Soul had finally come clean about everything - even though she already had an inkling about it. It meant more coming from him, and she felt like he trusted her more than anyone now that she knew the truth.

There was nothing holding them back from being together anymore.

She was upset - heartbroken - that the rumor Star had told her was true, but she wasn't going to desert Soul either. He needed someone to be there with him, that much she knew. Soul had spent so many years with the regret and hatred balled up inside over being the cause of Wes' death that it was to the point where it physically destroyed him and ate at him from the inside out. He needed someone who would be by his side no matter what, and that was the exact person Maka wanted to be.

Discretely stretching out her back, Maka worked out the kinks that were there without waking Soul up, but squeaked when she felt his arm snake around her waist. Chills ran up her spine as he nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck, and gently bit the skin there.

Maka had never spent the night in a man's bed before, but experiencing it with Soul felt right and made her feel comfortable. His bare chest pressing against her was warm, she felt the soft thumping of his heart through their contact, and his breath tickled the small hairs on the back of her neck. She relished in the feel of him being close to her, the tingles and fluttering in her stomach reminding her it was real - that they were real.

"'Morning," he mumbled.

She felt the smile spread along her skin as he kissed the spot he had bitten. "'Morning."

Maka felt him move from her, the sheets behind her rustled as he settled down, and the hand that wasn't draped across her made a path down her spine. She had to suppress the whimper threatening to escape her by biting down on her lower lip and clutching the sheets closer to her. It didn't work as Soul chuckled behind her, and his gruff voice vibrated through her body.

"Jerk."

She pushed her rear away from his thighs and flopped onto her stomach. Burying her face in her pillow, she hid the blush that was slowly warming up her cheeks. The bed springs creaked, and Maka felt Soul's lips pepper small kisses along her shoulder blades, and his hair tickled her back as he went, eliciting small giggles from her. He bit down on her, taking some of her skin between his teeth, and Maka gasped. She loved those sharp teeth of his, how they'd scrape across her skin, and leave little red marks on her body; she was never one for biting until Soul came into her life. He gently slapped her rear, and took some of it in his grasp to shake it.

Maka turned her face away from the pillow and glared at him. "Are you an ass or boobs man?"

Laying his head down so that he was facing her, he said, "I'm a Maka man."

Maka flipped onto her side and wrung her arms around his neck to pull her body closer to his and wrapped her leg around his waist. His crimson eyes were heavy lidded as he looked down at her, and she felt her lower abdomen stir with a mixture of lust and want.

He was hers and she was his, the previous night was proof enough of that; she had given her all to him, and he had done the same. Whether it was either of their first time ever, didn't matter. The only thing that mattered was that they both loved each other enough to share in the most intimate of activities. Their first time together, while romantic and sweet, was still awkward and clumsy, and she couldn't have imagined it performed any other way. She wanted to be with Soul for the rest of her life; he was the only man she loved and ever would love.

"What are you thinking about?" His touch was gentle on her skin as he pushed back a few strands of hair, and Maka closed her eyes to control her rapidly beating heart.

"Just you and me," she opened her eyes, "and last night."

"Yeah, that was fun." His smile fell a little. "I never apologized for what I told you that night we broke up. I swear I didn't mean any of it. I do love you, really, I was just-"

"I know," she cut in. "You only said that because you were afraid you'd end up hurting me like Wes, but I trust you. If the darkness does come again, I'll be there with you, Soul. Whatever it is, we can get through it together."

She cupped her hands around his face, and pulled his mouth to hers. Their noses smooshed together, making it hard to breathe until they found the perfect placement for their current position. His tongue was smooth as it slipped beyond her lips and curled up against the roof of her mouth; hot, warm lust ran down her throat as it flowed throughout every one of her muscles. His hands greedily roamed her body, feeling every single part of her that he could reach and leaving goose bumps in their wake. They found their way to her chest and she moaned while he massaged her breasts, breaking their kiss so she could arch her back into his touch.

Her body felt like it was on fire, and she swore if he weren't holding her she would float away any minute. She was being stimulated in every way possible. His mouth was sucking and licking her neck, those damn teeth of his nibbling on her flushed skin. One hand was teasing her nipples and palming her breast while the other teased the hairs near her core. Her gasps and moans started to escape her mouth in small huffs of air and she was finding it harder to breathe, let alone think. It felt like he was all over her body, covering every available space as he ravaged her.

Her brain clouded over with lust, Maka couldn't concentrate on anything other than the thought of him being inside her. She loved Soul too much, and she needed to show him; she needed to let him know that she wasn't going to be like the others. There was no way in hell she was going to desert him because of what he had done in the past, and she was determined to prove just that.

She gently pushed him onto his back, removed his hands from their positions on her body, and straddled him. He raised a brow in confusion, and Maka gave him a reassuring smile as she bent down, their lips barely touching.

"You showed me how much you love me last night. It's time for me to repay the favor," she breathed out before closing the gap between them.

Chills ran down her scalp and spine as he threaded his fingers through her hair. She swiped her tongue over his lips before he parted them to let her in; it was her turn to make him weak, to fill him with her love as he had done to her.

He allowed her tongue to explore the inside of his mouth - gliding over his tongue, his teeth, and curling up along the roof of it as she sucked in every single one of his moans. Electricity flew through her as his hands moved out of her hair, down her back, over her rear, and along the underside of her thigh until they rested in the small space behind her knees. He dragged her legs further up on the bed, bringing her body to a sitting position on his lower abdomen. Moving herself slightly, she rubbed some of the moisture from her entrance onto him which earned her a small grunt and a light hip bucking action. Pride bubbled up inside her, mixing with the lust that was already there, and Maka broke away from him.

Pushing herself up, she smirked down at him as she grabbed the sheets that had fallen off their bodies, and pulled it up over her back as she laid back on top of him.

* * *

Later that day, Soul woke up to an empty bed and a cold spot where Maka had been only a few hours previously. Rubbing his hands over his face to rid it of the sleepiness, he stretched out his muscles before settling back down on the bed. In all honesty, everything since the night before felt like a dream. Not only had he told Maka the truth about what happened to Wes, but she had accepted him. She didn't leave when she had the chance nor did she judge him like their old friends had; she was the one who remained by his side.

His chest swelled up at the thought, and a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. He was finally able to be with the one person he loved and nothing was going to go wrong. The fortune that the woman had told them didn't come true and nor would it ever. The ruins were a distant part of his past, never to be seen in the present, and Maka was with him. He wasn't going to break up with her like before nor did he plan to hurt her with such cruel words again. He loved her, truly he did, and he was finally going to receive the happy ending he desperately needed.

Soul rolled over onto his side to find a note gently placed on the pillow beside him. He grabbed it and flipped it open to see Maka's familiar cursive writing scrawled on the piece of paper. It was neat and pretty as the scriber herself, nicer than his would ever be. The note told him that she had left for work already but would be back afterward to pick up where they had stopped. He folded it back up and chuckled lowly to himself; for someone who didn't like  _talking_ about sexual activities in her daily life, Maka was definitely the type of person who loved performing them at night.

He swung his legs off the bed, found his boxers on the floor to put them on, and walked toward the kitchen to prepare himself something to eat. He made a mental note that if Maka as going to be staying over at his loft from now on, he would have to make a trip to the store and buy things that didn't require a microwave. Now that he thought about it, if she was going to be living with him more than just the food was going to have to change.

Soul paused in the middle of his loft and looked around. It wasn't the messiest of places but neither was it clean. Clothes were strewn everywhere and small parts to his sculptures were scattered along the floor. There were were also a few bottles still hidden in places only he would notice, and the loft smelled faintly of musk and alcohol. He hoped Maka hadn't noticed, but knowing her, she probably had. He made the unconscious decision to at least clean up the place and make it appear half decent before she arrived back later that day.

He may have been a slob, but she definitely wasn't.

Sighing, he made his trek back toward the refrigerator to at least get some food into his system; it was going to take a good majority of the day to make things look nice for Maka. When he opened the fridge, however, he noticed that there was a plate of a few breakfast items waiting for him on one of the shelves. Plucking the note that was tapped on it, he recognized Maka's handwriting again and chuckled.

"I noticed you didn't have much to eat that was on the healthy side so I cooked something up for you. Maybe we can go shopping later? Or at least try to remove the stench from the loft. Love, Maka," he read out loud. He tossed the note on top of the counter and pulled out the plate of food.

"You sure do think of everything, don't you?"

* * *

Maka had actually overslept and was running late for work that morning, but she didn't tell Soul that in her note. She felt it was better if she kept silent about it so as to not cause the man to regret taking up a good majority of her time in bed. It was really both of their faults - mostly hers since she was fully aware she had work the next day - but he wouldn't see it that way. Soul was never really the type of person to blame others when he viewed his own actions were always at fault.

Barely making it fifteen minutes after she was scheduled, Maka plopped down in her desk and heaved a heavy sigh. She hoped one of her co-workers covered for her so she wouldn't get in too much trouble; she had done the same thing for a couple of them and secretly she wished they would return the favor for her. Luckily her silent prayers were answered when Liz dropped a pile of files on top of her desk.

"I covered for you," the dirty blonde woman told her.

Maka squinted at her. She had a feeling there was a catch. She had worked with Liz for a few months and was fully aware of her tricks to get what she wanted. However, she wasn't sure what it could be so she mumbled a feeble 'thanks' before booting up her computer. A few minutes passed, Maka idly tapping at the keyboard, and the woman still hadn't left. Maka sighed and sat back in her chair to look up at her.

"What's the matter?"

"Your father was looking for you," she trailed off at the end and eyed Maka suspiciously. "Also, something's different about you. What happened yesterday?"

She ignored the last comment and instead focused on the first one. "What do you mean my papa's looking for me?"

"I mean he was walking around the office checking every cubicle trying to see which one was yours. Pretty sure he even left you a note." Liz nodded to piece of paper that was lying on top of a small stack of papers, and Maka quickly snatched it up. "Now tell me what happened yesterday."

The blonde ignored her co-worker and read the note from her father. It was a request asking if she would be interested in meeting him for lunch that day. Maka licked her lips as she thought about how a lunch date with the man would go. It had been over six years since she even had a decent conversation with him and a part of her didn't want to join him. Another part of her yelled to take the offer and try to make amends with the man before it was too late; however, it was only a small part of her.

"Maka," came Liz's stern voice.

She looked up to see the other woman waiting for her response to the unanswered question from earlier. Deciding it was better to respond than ignore Liz, Maka gave the woman what she wanted. It was always better to answer Liz flat out when she asked a question rather than avoiding it because she was forceful and wouldn't drop it until she was satisfied.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm the same as I was yesterday." She turned back toward her computer and checked through the files that were leftover for her. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get to work."

Liz slammed her hand on top of Maka's desk, startling her in order to draw her attention away from the computer. "You're lying."

"I'm not lyi-"

"Yes you are. I can see it in your eyes and all over your face. For the last few weeks you were moping around the office and ignoring everyone, and all of a sudden you have a smile on your face and your eyes are sparkling more than usual." The woman leaned in closer to Maka and squinted. "I recognize those symptoms. Did you get laid?"

Maka squeaked and her hand flew over her mouth to hide the smile that was definitely there. "I don't know what you mean," she said behind her hand.

Her eyes grew wider as she watched the grin form on her co-workers lips, and she knew automatically that she had given herself away. Liz gasped as she moved away from her. "You did! Who was it?"

Maka furiously shook her head, trying with all her might to convince Liz that she was wrong. "I didn't get laid, I swear! I just woke up in a better mood because-"

"Because someone boned you last night!" Liz leaned back over so that only Maka was able to hear her. "Tell me who it was or I'll go inform Mr. Albarn what his beloved little daughter has been up to."

Maka fought back the urge to hit the other woman, deciding instead it was better to admit the truth rather continuously deny it.

She removed her hand from her mouth and took a deep breath to brace herself for the reaction Liz was bound to have. "Soul and I are back together as of last night."

Every single emotion flashed across the older woman's eyes; from joy to sorrow to realization to heartbreak, it was all there. Wes had been Liz's fiance for a short time, and now that he was gone, there was no wedding to be had for her. Maka felt guilty that she would eventually have what the other woman never would, but what was she supposed to do? Figure out a way to save Soul from murdering his brother all those years ago so they could both have a happy ending? Not even all the steam power in the world could do that.

"You and Soul, huh?" the joy was gone from Liz's voice, and guilt shot through her chest.

Liz glanced down and Maka swore she saw moisture glisten in her deep blue eyes. The heartbreak she must have felt over losing her fiance so suddenly was still rough on her heart and the younger blonde saw it. Wes never should have died so young, but there was nothing for her to do about it except try to console the older woman.

Maybe lying to Liz was better after all.

"I know how difficult things must be for you, but-"

"No," Liz cut in and when she looked up, there were small streaks of tears staining her cheeks. "It's fine. I'm happy for you, really I am… I'm sure Wes would have been proud of his brother, and you two deserve each other. Soul really did miss you when you were with the Scythes. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to sort through these files."

Maka watched the girl leave. She felt the conversation should have gone completely different than it had, but she was also glad it occurred the way it did. Liz was a strong girl, and she was positive one day the older blonde was going to be able to get passed Wes' death exactly like Soul had. At least, Maka knew deep down in her heart they both would find the peace they deserved when it came to the other man's untimely passing. 

Sighing, she resumed working until noon rolled around. 

 

[[finish off the rest then around lunch time either Spirit comes to her or she bumps him into; she brushes him off for lunch and tells him she's too busy; have her wanting to have lunch with him but then she's sees him and realizes she isn't ready yet; ends with Spirit telling her that he has to go on a mission that day anyways]]

* * *

Soul was startled awake by the front door being slammed shut. Glancing around his surroundings, he noted that it was dusk as the orange, yellow and pink in the sky outside the window mixed together to create a mythical setting. Even the city below appeared to be quiet as they all settled into their homes to spend some time with their family before going back out for the night. He was still sitting on the couch, his meal from earlier half eaten and sitting in his lap; he didn't remember when he had fallen asleep or the fact that he was tired, but it had happened. Smoothing his fingers through his hair, he stretched out his back and shook himself awake.

"Were you asleep?" Maka accused.

"No," he growled. "I was resting my eyes."

"Uh huh, sure."

She removed her bag that was strapped around her waist and thigh before tossing it to the side where her personal belongings were, and slipped her feet out of her boots and placed them next to his own by the door. Her footsteps were soft as she walked the short distance between them and plopped down on the couch. He side eyed her as she tucked her legs beneath her on the couch and snuggled up to him, wrapping her arm around his waist. Warmth spread up his side at the contact and a small smile spread on his lips.

"How was work?"

"Mmm, stressful. There were far too many files to sort through and we left with about twenty unsorted." She pressed her face further into his chest before speaking again. "Also I ignored my father again."

"You two still haven't talked things over?" He was fully aware of the relationship Maka had with her father. It was obvious during their time at the academy; Spirit was always trying to dote on his daughter, but she avoided him every chance she had. The way she spoke about the man was proof of where their relationship had always stood.

He felt her head move against his chest. "No… but I do feel like it's time." She picked her head up to glance at him. "I've resented him for long enough and we both need to settle the unresolved conflict that's been growing between us… me more than him."

"Glad to see you finally come to your senses." She pinched his side. "Ow! Fuck!"

"You don't have to be an ass about it."

"And you know it's true," he remarked as she glared up at him. "Maka, you've been holding a grudge against the man since you were twelve, don't you think it's about time you bury the damn hatchet? Yes your dad was a dick for what he did to your mom, but he's apologized to you countless times. What more do you want from the man?"

"Since when did you grow up?" she pouted.

He shrugged. "Suppose some of you rubbed off on me."

"Well, I don't like it."

Lowly chuckling, he said, "would you like me to change?"

"Yes."

"Guess you'll just have to get used to it, then, because I'm not changing for shit. If one of us is going to be the level-headed person in this relationship, I'd prefer it to be me."

"Why's that, so you can tell me when I'm being a shithead?"

"Payback's a bitch, you know that."

Her laugh vibrated against his chest and his heart was close to bursting. It sounded like angels singing their praise from the heavens above; it was a highly addicting laugh.

"Fine, you can be an ass and I'll be the idiot in our relationship. As long as that means I can be lazy, it's fine with me," she said.

"I'm not lazy. I just know how to spend my energy for the day better than you."

"That's being lazy, Soul."

"Maybe in Maka's book, but in Soul's book, it's being productive as fuck." Her only response was to laugh and call him an idiot. Reverting their conversation back to the original situation, he said, "so you gonna talk to your dad tomorrow?"

A small pause passed between them as Maka debated her answer in her head. "Yeah. Come tomorrow, I'll go out to lunch with my father and apologize for being a jackass to him for the past ten years."

"I'm glad," he said. "What are we eating for dinner?"

Maka pushed herself away from his chest and glared at him. "Is it always about food when it comes to you?"

"Of course. Food is the most important thing in life. You need it to survive, Maka." He thunked her gently on the head with two fingers as if she were being ridiculous.

"Food and sex, that's all boys care about." She thrust her legs off the couch and grabbed the plate off his lap as she stood up. "Do you want takeout? Unless you wanna cook, because I don't feel like it."

"I can think of other things to eat if sex is on the menu." Soul smiled to himself as he turned around to see her reaction.

"What are you…" she trailed off as she tried to digest his words. Once her mind was able to register what he said properly, her eyes turned to slits. "Call the Chinese takeout place and order our usual, pervert."

He laughed as he whipped his phone from his pocket and dialed the number. "You were the one who said boys only think about food and sex. Plus, I thought you like it when I eat you out. If I remember correctly, you were the one who said Eater suited me what with the way I know how to work my tong-"

"If you finish that sentence I will murder you in your sleep!" she yelled.

* * *

The first thing about Maka that everyone knew was the fact that she was a very light sleeper. It was one of the main reasons why Soul and Black Star always had a difficult time pranking her in the early days at the academy. Any small sound that was within a five meter area of her was capable of stirring her awake. However, useful as it could be, she also hated being a light sleeper because it sparked her fear of thunderstorms when she was younger. Every night there was one, she was awake at the first crack of thunder, cowering under her blankets until it passed. They were definitely not the most fond memories from her childhood.

Along with being a light sleeper, Maka's animal instincts had always been highly attuned, allowing her to sense danger before it hit.

Maka woke up to the sound of whining and moaning near her ears and the tight tug of someone pulling on her sleep shirt. She didn't open her eyes right away, thinking it was all a dream, but after a few seconds of listening, they finally snapped open. Listening to the man behind her for a while, she slowly turned around to see that he was muttering in his sleep as he buried his face into her back. The bedsheets on his side of the bed were tangled around his body as if he had fought them during the night. There were little beads of sweat on his forehead and his hair was plastered to the skin. To put it nicely, Soul looked like a mess.

"Maaaa…," he moaned out.

She strained herself to hear the rest, trying to figure out what was wrong with him.

"...kkaaaa… noooo… please… nooooottt… stop," were the only coherent words she was able to pick up before realizing he was having a nightmare. Panic rushed through her as faint memories of the ones he reiterated to her when they younger were brought to the forefront her mind.

From what she was able to gather, his dreams were truly from the deepest parts of hell that rose from the ground with their only intent being to haunt him.

Turning around slightly so as not to loosen his grip on her short, she tried to shake him awake. "Soul! Soul, wake up! Wake up, Soul! You're having a nightmare!"

It took her several minutes to finally wake him up. Soul's crimson eyes were wild as he checked his surroundings to make sure he was truly in the real world. He breathed heavily from his nose and Maka watched as his chest rapidly rose and fell before he finally started to settle down. Relief slowly creeped over her skin as his body physically calmed down, but it disappeared once his eyes fell on her. She noted the humiliation that sparked beneath them along with regret.

He broke their eye contact and nonchalantly untangled himself from the bed sheets without a word to her. She observed his body movements as he did so, waiting for him to say something - anything - to her. After witnessing him experiencing a nightmare for the first time in years, she expected him to be talkative on the matter, but instead he silently sat on the edge of the bed and placed his head in his hands. A few minutes passed with only the sounds from the city below to break it before she cautiously crawled across the bed to rest her hand on the small of his back.

"Do you-"

"You weren't supposed to see that," he muttered.

"What?"

"You weren't supposed to see that," he said again.

"But why?" she asked.

He stood up off the bed, allowing her hand to fall from his back and leaving her question unanswered as he walked toward the bathroom. Maka sat there for a while longer, debating if she should follow him or not, before getting up. She stood in the doorway and eyed him cautiously as he splashed the cool running water on his face and turned it off to wipe himself clean on the towel that hung limply on the rack. When he was done, Soul made eye contact with her in the mirror. Taking in a sharp breath, she noticed how worried and tired his eyes were, and vaguely wondered how long he had secretly been having the nightmares.

Days? Weeks?

This was definitely not a once a year occurrence.

"How long have they been happening?" she finally asked.

Soul averted his eyes from her as he looked down at the white sink. "They've been getting worse since my brother's death. Sometimes I'll go months without having a nightmare, but then they come back ten times worse compared to the last one."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you didn't have to know about them."

"But I'm living with you now," she retorted. "I should have at least known you were having them again so I wouldn't be surprised like I was tonight."

He looked back at her reflection. "You were surprised?"

"Of course." She breathed out heavily as she walked into the bathroom and stood behind him, noting that his eyes followed her while she did. Wrapping her arms tightly around his waist, she leaned against him and squeezed. "You had me worried there for a while, Soul. I don't like seeing you so distraught and hurt. I wish there was something I could do, but there isn't, we both know that."

There was a moment of silence after her small speech. She felt his fingertips ghost along the outline of her hands and arms and small chills flew down her spine. It occurred to her how intimate her pose was against him and was only able to imagine how comforting the small gesture was for the man. He had spent years having to deal with the nightmares on his own, but he wouldn't have to anymore. She was with him now; there was nothing they couldn't face as long as they were together. They both loved each other dearly and wouldn't let anything harm the other without there being an all out brawl.

"Are they like the ones you had back at the academy?"

Years ago, she had spent a few nights after his breakdown upon hearing her assigned Aerodynamics division outside of their cabin, staying up with him and trying to draw his mind away from the nightmares. He only shared a couple of them with her, but based on what she was able to gather, they appeared to be minor. There was nothing too terrifying in them nor were they as dark as she had assumed they would be. However, now it appeared like he was trying to fend for his life in them.

"No." She felt his back rise a little as he took a deep breath. "Like I said, they keep getting worse as time goes on. They're more vivid now and are taking things from my real life and altering them to make it more sinister."

"What do you mean?"

The hesitation in his voice was missed as he said, "I've had dreams where I was the one who killed you at the ruins instead of the cyborg."

Maka moved one of her hands on his chest to where she knew his scar was and gently rubbed along the outline. "But you didn't." She lay a small kiss on his bare back where his spine was located before continuing. "I'm safe, and we're both together now. Nothing's going to change that."

"How sure are you about that, though?" he asked.

Unwrapping her arms from around him, she moved to stand by his side and stared at his reflection. "I'm positive because you and I are a great a team when we're together. We're both fantastic on our own, but put us together and there's nothing we can't conquer."

Although he nodded, there was no conviction in his gaze, and Maka sighed. It was going to take more than a late night pep talk to make him believe her.

"Come on. Let's go back to bed."

Maka wrapped her hand around his and led him back to bed, gently pushing him onto it before walking around to the other side. It took a few more persuasive actions on her part to get him to lay down, but after a while he finally did. A few seconds passed where she was staring at his back before he rolled over and curled up against her. With his head pressed on her stomach and his arm curled around her waist, Maka gently soothed him to sleep by stroking his head.

Once his breathing steadied out and she was sure he was asleep, she stopped. Watching the lights of the city glow outside, she guarded him from the monsters while he slept.

* * *

The next morning Maka rapidly silenced her alarm clock before sparing a quick glance behind her at Soul. His soft snores and the small drip of drool escaping from the corner of her mouth were confirmation enough that he was still asleep. She breathed out a small sigh of relief as she quietly threw her legs over the bed and stretched out her back. After the nightmare incident, she barely slept a wink. Instead she spent most of the night staring at him because she was too afraid he would have another one and she wanted to be there for him.

It wasn't until around three in the morning that she finally passed out, and she had a feeling that getting about four hours of sleep before work was not a good idea.

She went through her regular morning routine, tip toeing across the hardwood floor that creaked in certain places, and even made sure the water wasn't too loud while she brushed her teeth. It was weird and uncomfortable being extra cautious, but she was worried about Soul not getting enough sleep. The nights when he found it difficult to sleep during their year at the academy came to mind, and a grumpy Soul was never a good thing. The man had a shorter temper when he was running low on juice and that was something the world wasn't ready for.

It took her longer than normal to arrive at work because the bus she usually rode was running a few minutes late, but somehow she still made it on time. She walked down the short hallway in the front of Shibusen, saying a small greeting to a couple people as she passed them, and opened the door to where her own office resided in. A blur of raven hair flashed in her vision about halfway to her desk, and the form of Jackie Dupre stood in her way. Her dark eyes were focused harshly on Maka, and the blonde felt like apologizing for every single thing she ever did wrong - including the time she accidentally dyed the cat purple when she was six.

"Can I help you?" Maka asked after a few seconds.

Jackie's stare softened as she spoke. "Lord Death told me tell you that he would like to see you promptly in his office. He also said to mention that you aren't in any trouble; there's something he wants to tell you personally."

Maka felt herself slowly nod as she digested the woman's words. It was rare and out of character for Lord Death to call her into his office, but she assumed it must have been something important because he wouldn't have done it otherwise.

"Right. I'll go put my stuff down at my desk and then head over there."

The dark haired girl shook her head. "Lord Death said there was no need for that. He actually encouraged me to tell you to take your personal belongings with you because he had a feeling you weren't going to stay at the office for very long."

The blonde's eyes bulged. "Do you think he's going to fire me?"

"Maka," Jackie's voice was flat and reminded her of the way Soul sometimes spoke to her when she was overreacting or over thinking a situation. "Why would Lord Death fire you? You're one of the best employees we've had in years. You could probably miss a few days of work, even slack off a little, and still remain working here. If there's one person in this office who has job security, it's you."

She was slightly taken aback by the other woman's kind words; Jackie rarely showed her sincere side to people whose name wasn't Kim Diehl. "Um, thank you," Maka offered.

"You're welcome," the woman smiled before whipping her hand around her back and handing a few case files to Maka. "Since you're already going there, can you hand these over to Lord Death for me?"

There was always a catch when it came to the dark haired girl; she was hardly ever nice without some ulterior motive.

Nodding, Maka grabbed the files from her and turned to leave the office.

The trip to Lord Death's office was nerve-wracking at best. Her mind constantly wandered to curious thoughts and different scenarios of what she was possibly walking into. Maybe he had heard about her recent reconciliation with Soul and was offering the pair a permanent spot among the Spartoi members, or maybe he wanted to congratulate her on being a wonderful worker. The scenarios varied from worse to best, each rising on the totem pole with her every step until she finally reached the large mahogany door.

Slowly curling her hand into a fist, she raised it and cautiously knocked on the door. She leaned in closer in order to hear his childlike 'come in'. Her fingers tingled with anticipation, and her heart was pounding so hard it felt like it was going to burst out of her chest any minute. Then finally she heard the response she had been waiting for before wrapping her fingers on the doorknob and entering the office.

Lord Death sat at his desk like usual, nothing out of the ordinary in sight.

That is, except for a small recorder that sat alone on top of his desk, and the strange unease wafting around in the room. Maka's danger senses were on high alert as she waited for the man - or cyborg - to speak.

"It's good to see you again, Maka. How are things?" he asked after several minutes.

She smiled. "Everything's good."

"Glad to hear that." A small, awkward pause. When he spoke again, his voice appeared to grow deeper and more solemn which caused her own mind to grow even more worrisome. "Unfortunately I didn't call you into my office to trade pleasantries. You are in here because I have some sorrowful news for you."

Maka released the shaking breath she hadn't realized she was holding in as she nodded to prompt him to continue. Taking one gloved hand, Lord Death slid the recorder across his desk toward her.

"This is for you." She stepped forward to pick it up, placing her thumb on the play button, but didn't press it. His words stopped her from going further. "I don't want you to play it here. Instead, I would like to relay the news to you personally before you hear the final words that reside forever more on that electronical device."

She swallowed. "Final words?"

If Lord Death had a mouth that moved, she felt like it would have licked his lips at that very moment. "I regret to inform you that Spirit Albarn was murdered on one of his recent missions, but his final moments have been preserved on that recorder. I felt it should have been passed on to you in order for you to have some form of closure."

Averting her glance away from him, she looked down at the recorder in her hands. Every possible emotion was flowing through her; there was regret, hatred, despair, and denial coursing through her body. Her hands started to shake slightly, and she was only vaguely aware of the stinging in her eyes. Spirit couldn't possibly be dead; it had to be some sort of sick joke. There had been plans to reconcile her relationship with him - she was only thinking of doing so the previous night.

It didn't make any sense. Why would life decide that now was a wonderful time to take away the man she had resented for years? Why did it have to occur now? Of all the times she had wished him dead, why did it have to come true the day she was going to finally forgive him? The day that she was going to try and repair their damaged relationship?

She almost expected her father to jump out from the door that rested behind Lord Death's desk.

"Is this some kind of sick joke?" she finally asked, glaring back up at the being before her.

"I'm afraid it isn't," he offered. "I understand if you would like to take the remainder of the day to come to terms with this news. That's why I've excused you from work already. Once you leave this office, I must request that you go home instead of bury yourself into your work. This type of news is very stressing and-"

"Stressing? You call this stressing? Do you have any idea what type of relationship I had with my papa?" The term of endearment that had been foreign to her since she was twelve felt comfortable on her lips, but it didn't matter. There was no one alive she was able to call give the term to anymore. "This isn't stressing, this is traumatic! I was going to reconcile with him today! I was going to tell him that I forgave him-"

Her voice broke on the last two words, and Maka clutched the recorder to chest and tightly shut her eyes closed in order to prevent the tears from escaping. She couldn't cry, not here, and certainly not now.

Licking her lips, she said, "I'm going home now. I need to be with someone who actually cares about how I feel about the situation and won't try to make it better with a stupid tape recorder."

She glared at Lord Death before turning around and leaving his office. Keeping her head down low, she ignored the curious glances the other employees offered her as she allowed the tears to slowly fall down her face. She didn't need or want any of their condolences; none of them truly cared about her, and they certainly would never understand her feelings when it came to Spirit Albarn. For the time being, there was only one person on her mind who would be able to understand the heartbreak she was experiencing.

The only place she wanted to be was in Soul's loft, wrapped up in his arms, and hearing the soothing words.

* * *

Since the moment Maka left for work, Soul had remained in bed wide awake staring outside the window across from him. The nightmare from the previous night was still haunting him in the back of his mind, and his gut was churning at the mere thought of it. He was disgusted with himself; how could he possibly have enjoyed slashing Maka to pieces? How was it possible that his taste buds were still craving for a drop of her blood?

He should have been passed it all by now, but he wasn't. The fortune teller's prediction was slowly coming true, and he was starting to fear the worst. It was only a matter of time before one of their lives ended, and he was determined to make sure she was the one who continued to live on. A nagging voice in the back of his mind that sounded an awful like Maka told him to stop fretting over such nonsense - a very Maka thing to do - but he countered it. There was a perfect reason behind his fretting.

Losing the woman he loved was a bet he wasn't willing to take, and thinking of ways to protect her helped calm him down.

The hustle and bustle of the city below was well underway when he heard the front door open. Glancing at the clock on his nightstand, he noted that it was barely nine; Maka was supposed to be at work, not back home. He turned around and watched her silent figure as she slowly closed the door and rested her forehead on the hardwood. Not wanting to scare her, he rolled over and quietly called out to her.

"Maka."

Maka removed her head from the door, but kept her gaze downcast as she turned toward him. When she spoke, her voice sounded broken and distant, and his heart ached. "Hey, Soul."

"What are you doing home so early?"

She shuffled over to him like her feet were made of lead and she wasn't able to pick them up, and dropped something onto the nightstand with a loud 'thunk' before sitting on the bed. Soul fought the urge to reach out to her, every fiber in his body screaming at him to hold the woman, but he wouldn't. Something told him this was a conversation she had to initiate it herself. No matter how hard he felt her misery, he had to allow her to be the one to initiate it.

After several minutes passed, she finally spoke. "Papa's dead," she whispered.

Soul waited to see if she was going to turn around and tell him she was joking; Spirit Albarn wasn't possibly dead. Maka had just been telling him about the man the night before, how she planned to mend their broken relationship and start over. It didn't make sense. What kind of universe did they live that decided it was great idea to do that to someone? To tear apart their chances of making things right with their own father?

It wasn't fair.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

Reaching out to the thing she had dropped on the nightstand, Maka grabbed it and fell back on the bed, landing gently on his stomach. He noted the redness that brimmed her green eyes - the colors a nice contrast if it weren't for the circumstances - and the puffiness of her cheeks along with the light pink under her nose were all indications that she had cried all the way home. His heart broke for her. Out of everyone in the world, she was taking the death the hardest and with good reason; he understood what it felt like to have unresolved conflict sticking in the air between a loved one who passed and yourself.

"Maka," he quietly said as he laid his hand on her stomach.

She turned her head at the touch and gave him a small smile. "Papa's gone and I-"

Her voice broke at the end, and Soul was prompted to wrap his arms around her waist to pull her toward him. She didn't need to be pushed to accept the small act as she turned around in his arms and buried her face in his night shirt. The moisture from her tears seeped through the material, and he felt her body shake and crumble as he patted her back.

Allowing her to release the pain from her heart, he continued to hold her until the shaking stopped and her breath was coming out in small hiccups. It was another few minutes before she pried her face away from his shirt and glanced up at him behind ash blonde bangs. His arms tightened around her, giving her waist a small squeeze.

"Lord Death called me into his office and gave me the news," she whispered.

Her voice was hoarse from all the crying she had done that day, and he wasn't sure if he should feel relieved or furious at the thought of Lord Death being the one who told her. Whether the form of their old headmaster was a cyborg or human, he was fully aware he hadn't offered any comfort to the girl in his arms.

"Let me guess, he told you and then sent you on your merry way without even giving you consolation prize?" She nodded and he snorted. "Typical. Bastard is supposedly the lord of death, yet he can't even help those who have to grieve because of it."

Maka placed her hand on his chest. "Did he do the same thing to you when Wes died?"

He nodded. "Told me a bunch of bullshit about how my brother was proud of me and, that his death wasn't my fault before sending me back here. To an empty loft that I shared with my brother. Wasn't exactly the comfort I needed."

"Look at us, the couple who both lost someone close to them and only received a half-assed form of closure for it," she joked.

"Hm," he hummed.

The small glint of merriment disappeared from her gaze as she looked away from him. Joking aside, the both knew they deserved more than an apology for their loss, a pat on the back, and a dismissal from work for a day - or forever in Soul's case.

A few minutes passed and Soul's attention was drawn to the object in her hand. Reaching between them, he lightly tapped and broke her away from her own reverie.

"What is this?" he asked.

As if remembering something important, her eyes bulged and she flipped on her back, being sure not to ruin his hold on her.

"It's a tape recorder. Lord Death said it held papa's last words on it, and that it might help with the grieving process." She lifted the object up a little, her thumb twirling around the play button, and looked up at him. "Do you think I should listen to it?"

"What harm could it possibly do if you did?"

She shrugged. "I don't know, but I am kind of scared to hear it. What if it's not something I want?"

Soul's mouth tugged into what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "You won't know until you press play."

Deep down, he hoped it would give the woman at least some closure with her father's death, but the more cynical side to him hoped the opposite. A small part of him wanted them both to grieve together, but he also wanted her to be happy and the only way that was possible was if Spirit's words were somewhat comforting. Maybe they were somewhat affectionate, maybe he spent the last few moments of his life telling his daughter that he forgave her for all the bullshit she put him through.

However, one only hoped that was true as Maka pressed down the play button.

"This is Spirit Albarn, captain of Spartoi team number fifty-six," came the man's voice as it emitted from the little speaker. "I'm reporting our finding at the ruins as the rest of my men try to fend it off. I don't believe any of us are going to make it out of this alive."

There was a pause as his words were diminished by a loud roar that caused goosebumps to prick Soul's skin along with the shouts of men. Glancing at Maka, he noted the slight spark of recognition at the sound they had just heard.

"Have you heard that-"

"Sh," she quickly silenced, pressing the recorder closer to her ears.

"We weren't able to find the cyborg, but we found something that's much worse. It's a-"

Once again he was cut off by the loud roar. "I don't have time to describe it. Whoever listens to this, just note that the ruins hold a monstrous creature that is beyond our worst nightmares. Don't send anymore teams out here, please. I am officially dubbing this place as far too dangerous. Evacuate the nearby city and be done with it."

A short pause as they listened to the creature mentioned roar once more and the horrible screams of Spirit's comrades.

"There's also one last thing I would like to say. Whoever listens to this final message, please relay something to my daughter, Maka Albarn." Soul felt the woman in question stiffen at the mention of her name, and felt the room grow silent as they both listened closely.

"Tell her that I love her very much, and that I understand why she resented me for so long. I never meant to hurt her with my actions for all those years and I'm sorry for all of it. I wish we had time to mend our relationship, angel, but know I do love you very much. Not a day went by that you didn't make me proud. I love you, baby girl, and I'm sorry it has to end this way."

The tape cut off and, holding his breath, Soul waited for Maka to say or do anything. Her eyes remained trained on the recorder between her fingers, not a muscle in her body moved, and her chest slowly rose and fell as she breathed. Several seconds passed and his heart was beating against his chest with anticipation. It wasn't until he heard her sniffle that he gripped her tighter.

Maka dropped the recorder as she turned to bury her face into his chest once again, and he slowly rocked her as she shook against him. He was only able to catch a few of her muffled words as she sobbed them out. However, he didn't say anything to try and ease her pain - he wasn't sure what to say. The only thing he did was run soothing circles on her back and allowed her to cry in peace. There were no words for him to say that would help her through this, he knew this based on experience.

Everyone in the world could give her their condolences, but none of it would heal the scar on her heart.

"Why did it have to happen now?" she asked.

Soul glanced down to see her focused on him, waiting for his reply. He slowly shook his head. "I don't know how to answer that."

"It isn't fair." She snuggled up closer to him, wrapping an arm around his waist and tugging on his shirt from the back. "I was going to apologize for everything today and then this happened."

He pulled her closer to him and tightened his arms. "I know."

An hour passed before her body finally stopped shaking and the tears halted. Neither one said a word to each other, the silence of the loft soothing them to sleep.


	9. Just One Yesterday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: explicit sexual content (slightly if you read this before I go and edit this part)

The next day at work, Maka walked into a hell storm. Spartoi members were running around, talking to different secretaries and handing over files. The yelling and swishing of paper all formed together to create an environment of discord and alarm. It was a mad house. Maka wasn't sure where to keep her focus as her co-workers flew past her carrying stacks of files, and instead of trying to make sense of the situation, she walked toward her desk.

Plopping down on her chair, she placed her bag on the floor beside her and turned on her computer. The first thing that always came up on the screen was a list of the reports she had to sort through that were left over from the night before. Usually there were only a couple of files for her to sort, but that morning there were about twenty on her list. Scrolling through each of them, she noted that they were all reports from Spartoi, specifically the teams that were assigned to the ruins.

"Jackie!" Maka called out when she glanced up to see the dark haired girl jog in front of her desk. The other girl abruptly stopped to look over at her, giving a small nod in acknowledgement. "What's going on with Spartoi?"

Jackie let out a small sigh and walked closer to Maka's desk, switching the files that she was holding from one arm to the other. "Apparently. they were searching out those ruins you and Soul had encountered years ago and found something in the town next to it. Now they're planning on going out there to battle some kind of monster but that's only based on what I've been able to gather while skimming these files." She nudged her arm a little to indicate what she meant.

"Do you know what it might be for sure?" Maka had an inkling of what it could be as the memory of her father's conversation with Kilik months/weeks ago crossed her mind, but she wanted to be sure.

However, Jackie shook her head. "No. That part's being kept underwraps. The only ones who know for sure are the Spartoi members and Lord Death."

Maka sighed in defeat and sat back in her chair. There was no possible way any of the members or Lord Death were going to let her in on the little secret. A part of her wished she had joined the Aerodynamics division when she arrived back in Death City, but the other part reminded her that she hadn't wanted to unless Soul was with her. They were always better together, that had been proven when they were younger and again even now.

"Hey." Maka looked up to see Jackie leaning over her desk with a conspiratory look on her face. "I'm sure if you go ask Lord Death, he'll let you join them. Based on what I've heard, you were always the best student in the academy. Maybe he'll make an exception for you now."

"But what about Soul? I know him, and he'll worry his ass off if I go without him. But seeing as… well, you know what happened with his brother?"

"I've heard rumors, but nothing concrete."

"Right." Maka licked her lips and debated on whether she should confirm the rumors or not, but thought better of it. Soul wouldn't want everyone to know he was the reason for Wes's death. "I mean with him having been asked to leave Spartoi for undisclosed reasons, I don't think Lord Death will let him join me."

Jackie shrugged and smiled. "I think he might. You and Soul are together again, unless that's just a rumor too, and from what I've heard, he's changed since you arrived. You'll never know if you don't ask."

Maka nodded and thanked her co-worker as she rushed off to deliver the files she was holding. Jackie did have a point; Maka could ask Lord Death if her and Soul could join Spartoi on their mission back to the ruins. There was no harm in asking, and Maka was trying to work with Soul when it came to the darkness that had engulfed his soul. The dark haired girl was also right when she said Soul had changed since Maka came back.

Even before they were together, she saw the subtle changes in his posture and attitude. He wasn't as guarded as before, and he was making an effort to alter himself, whether it was because of her or not, she wasn't sure. Soul had become a stronger person than he was when she first saw him, and she had a feeling going to the ruins would prove that even more, both to her and to Soul.

Scooting away from her desk, Maka ignored the files that were waiting for her on the computer and marched her way down the halls toward Lord Death's office. She was confident, and she didn't want to lose that confidence by procrastinating the task at hand. Even if Lord Death didn't want to allow them to go for whatever reason, the thought of using her father's death came to mind. Not only would allowing her to fight along side the other's at the ruins help Soul, but it would help Maka with exacting her revenge on the unknown creature that had murdered Spirit.

She arrived at the large mahogany doors and softly knocked. There were sounds of drawers closing and a chair's legs scruffing against the floor before Maka heard the muffled 'come in'. When she entered the office, she noted that Lord Death looked slightly guilty of something, and she felt like he had known she was on her way. She wasn't sure if it was the fact that he had forgotten to exit out of her profile in his computer or Spirit's file sprawled out on his desk.

Whichever it was, the head of Shibusen was anticipating her arrival.

"Ah, Maka. It's good to see. Come, sit down." Lord Death gestured with a gloved hand to the chair in front of him. She did as she was told before he spoke again. "What brings you here today?"

"I'm aware of Spartoi heading out to the ruins tomorrow, and I want to know why." There was no use beating around the bush; she wanted answers, and she wanted them now.

Lord Death sighed. "I had a feeling you would be coming to see me about that, however, I can't release that information-"

"No," she cut in. "I don't want to hear that! Whatever Spartoi is going to fight tomorrow, it killed my father! Yes, I was able to figure it out on my own. I'm not an idiot, you and I both know that, so stop keeping secrets from me." Maka sighed, realizing she was angrier about the situation than she had thought, but she had good reason to be. "Please. My papa died because of that thing out there; the least you can let me do is be part of the team that takes it down."

He bowed his head, and Maka heard what sounded like a resigned sigh. "I suppose you're right, and I did promise Spirit I would tell you the truth if anything happened to him."

Lord Death paused for a while, but then a few seconds ended up being a few minutes until Maka was sure he had fallen asleep. She slowly leaned forward to poke him in the arm when a door in the back of the office opened. Jumping up, she saw a tall man with jet black hair and three rings going around his head where the hair was white. She had never seen him before, but somehow he looked familiar.

"I'm the real Lord Death, Maka."

To say she was shocked didn't even begin to explain how she felt about the reveal. After years of her believing Lord Death was a cyborg draped in a black cloak with a skull mask and gloves too large for a normal person, never in her wildest dreams did she ever imagine he would turn out to be a human, that there would actually be someone behind the curtain playing with the controls.

"So you're really a human?" The answer was blatant, but she still asked the question.

"Yes." He walked over toward the cyborg, interlocking his hands behind his back, and stood behind his desk. "It's always a shock in the beginning, but I'm sure you'll get used to it."

Maka nodded, but she still didn't understand completely. "But why would you need a robot?"

"Because I've always felt it was easier to seem approachable when people believe I'm a robot rather than a grown man. I have a slight tendency to come off as harsh and mean so this," he patted the cyborg, "was always for show. The only ones who knew the truth were your father and those of higher ranking in Spartoi. Now, about your request, Ms. Albarn." He paused and sighed before continuing. "I'm going to approve it, under one condition. Also, please sit down. I'd rather this be a more casual exchange."

Maka glanced down, remembering that she was still standing, and sat back down as she was prompted to. "I'm sorry. I just wasn't expecting you to appear like that."

"I understand," he nodded. "First, before I continue, I need to make sure Soul has informed you about what happened in the incident with Wes. I've heard the rumors that you and him were back together," he quickly added upon seeing her confused face.

"He told me, yes."

"Good. Which leads me to my condition; I need you to make sure he doesn't turn like that again. If I send Soul back out to the ruins, I can't afford to protect him if he does murder someone, you understand this?"

"I do, but I don't think it'll be necessary. With all due respect, Soul isn't the same person he was back then. He's been trying to fight against whatever it was that caused him to do that to Wes, and in my opinion, he's been doing great. It won't come down to that, sir."

Lord Death's smile was small and not reassuring in the slightest. "Let's hope it doesn't."

"Now, let me brief you on what you're going into." He carefully grabbed the open file on top of his desk and handed it over to Maka. "This is your father's file. It talks about the shadows his team found out near the ruins. We aren't sure what they are, exactly, but we do know they've been infecting the people in the town nearby."

Maka flipped through the pages, skimming over the words on each of them and only capturing certain key words as they popped into her mind. The shadows described in the report were the same ones she had overheard Kilik telling her father about felt like months ago, and from what she gathered, it had become worse as time went on. Apparently, the people in the town were each being affected by the shadows (described as black smoke surrounding their bodies) and had started to attack those who weren't infected.

"So why now? Why is Spartoi gearing up to go fight these things now?" Maka asked when she finished looking through the report.

"We actually have a small team out there trying to handle most of the situation and evacuating civilians who are still normal before tomorrow, but we need more reinforcements. In the beginning, it wasn't as dangerous; our teams were only encountering maybe one or two people who were infected, but as time went on, more were showing up. Our mission is to commander the situation, and do whatever's necessary to bring peace back to the community without harming more civilians and members than need be."

Comprehension dawned on Maka as she slowly digested his words. "You mean murder those who have been infected."

Lord Death nodded solemnly before walking around his desk so that he was standing directly in front of her. "Do you think that's something you can do?"

Maka gulped. It was a lot to take in, but she felt confident her and Soul would be able to conquer anything as long as they were together. It would be hard to kill innocent people, but in reality they weren't so innocent. According the report she had skimmed, they were incapable of being brought back to the basis of their humanity. They weren't like Soul; he was able to overcome the darkness and return to normal.

She nodded. "Yes, I think Soul and I will be able to do that."

"Good." The older man moved around her chair and placed his hand on her shoulder, giving it a small squeeze. She looked up to see him giving her a small smile. "I'm sorry I couldn't comfort you when I told you about Spirit's death. It must have been hard on you. Spirit was very proud of you, I want you to know that. He always spoke very highly of you. He was glad to be able to call himself your father because of everything you've accomplished in life. I don't want you to think any differently."

Maka's heart swelled and she had to bite back tears. She wasn't expecting to hear that about her father; she had felt like she was a terrible daughter to him throughout the years, so it was nice hearing how her father truly felt about her.

"Thank you." Her voice was strained when she spoke and it came out smaller than she had intended, but she sensed Lord Death understood how grateful she was.

* * *

Soul laid in bed, allowing Maka's words to travel through his mind as he replayed them over and over. It was ridiculous, really it was, but maybe for one night he felt like allowing his worries to takeover because going back to the ruins was dangerous. Neither one of them knew for sure what would happen once he stepped foot in the desert again, what would happen when he passed by the ruins. What if he blacked out again and the monster within resurfaced? He didn't know if he would be able to live with himself if anything were to happen to Maka.

He rolled over onto his side facing the girl in question and silently watched as her chest slowly rose and fell indicating she was deep in sleep. Not daring to disturb her, Soul tentatively reached a hand out to push back a few strands of hair from her bangs that were plastered on her forehead. Sleeping beside Maka was peaceful and serene; the nightmares weren't as vicious as they were before and he spent more nights sleeping than he did awake since she moved in with him. She was definitely someone he didn't want to lose.

If anyone were to die on the battlefield the next day, he wanted to make sure it was him rather than Maka. She was the one the world needed, not him; he was only a useless waste of space and nothing more. No one other than the woman laying beside him would miss the Soul that used to walk the earth. She would be the only one who remembered him, the only who mourned his death, and the only one who would care, but she would move on. Like most things in his life, she would be the one between them who would have the strength to continue on in life.

He would just succumb to the darkness and his life the moment he lost her.

Maka's face scrunched up as if something had disturbed her, and Soul quickly removed his hand. He held his breath as he waited to see what she would do next, hoping he didn't draw her out of her slumber, but his suspicions were confirmed as her eyes fluttered open. She blinked a few times as the city lights from outside shone through the windows and graced her face like a spotlight, and she stretched her arms out before turning to look at him.

"Is it time already?" Her voice was still harsh and groggy from just waking up and it made his heart pound.

Her voice would be one of the things he missed the most.

"Nah. It's just barely one in the morning." Soul swallowed before continuing. "You should go back to sleep. We have a big day tomorrow."

Maka rolled over and slightly shook her head. "Not if you're still awake."

She slowly reached out her hand to gently rub him and small tingles of warmth along with electricity shot up his arm. It was definitely going to be a difficult night with him knowing exactly was going to happen the next day. Even the fortune teller they had gone to see weeks ago confirmed it; one of them was going to be forever changed if they stepped foot in the ruins once again, and he had a feeling it was going to be him.

Realization flashed in her eyes and Soul's heart stopped for a millisecond before she spoke. "You had another nightmare, didn't you?"

He let out a small sigh of relief; he had thought she noticed the fear that was undoubtedly in his eyes. "No. I just can't seem to fall asleep tonight. You should rest, though."

However, his words still didn't convince her as she scooted closer to him and wrapped an arm around his chest to soothingly rub his back. "Soul, what's wrong? You know you can tell me anything, right?"

He debated whether he should tell her or not before answering. There really wasn't any harm in admitting to his fears and doubts when it came to their mission tomorrow, but he also didn't want his emotions to reflect in his girlfriend. She had been excited when she showed him the keys to their old solar ship Grigori and was enthused when she relayed the events of the day. So much had happened in such little time that even he found it hard to keep up with her. He was able to gather the basics of what had occurred; there were some shadow figures infecting the people who lived near the ruins, Lord Death had granted them permission to join Spartoi the next day, and the form he had thought was a cyborg for a majority of his life turned out to be an actual human being.

However, a part of him knew it would be better if he were honest about his feelings when it came to what was to come. Didn't he promise to be honest with her from now on?

Soul sighed and braced himself against the argument that was sure to come. "I'm nervous about tomorrow."

"What do you have to be nervous about? We've been trained in combat, and you and I both work well together…" Maka's face softened as a thought crossed her mind. "Is it because of the ruins and what happened to Wes?"

He slowly nodded and glanced down at the bedsheet beneath them. Neither one spoke for a while as they allowed the silence to swallow them; the only sound in the loft came from the city street below as a car horn blared or the voices flowed up to them. However, Soul tried to ignore the noises that once helped him sleep and instead focused his attention on the woman beside him. He listened to her soft breathing as she contemplated what to say next, the small beating of her heart that thrummed through his chest as she pressed herself closer to him, and the light tapping of her fingertips on his spine.

"Does it have to do with what the fortune teller told us?" she asked in a small voice. All he had to do was blink and she knew her answer. "Soul, I told you not to worry about that. The woman was a hoax; nothing she said has come true yet and you know that. She said you and I wouldn't be together for long, but here we are. Granted, we did break up for a while, but that's not the point."

She cupped her hands around his cheeks and forced him to look at her. "The point is we'll get through tomorrow… together. It doesn't matter what some random woman said; you and I are stronger when we're one rather than separated, and I have faith in us - in you."

His heart felt heavier as a lump formed in his throat, and he had to fight back the tears that were stinging the back of his eyes. She had faith in him; the woman he loved and pined for trusted that he wasn't going to hurt her or fall into the darkness like he had done with Wes. It was that same faith he needed to have in himself, but he didn't. He didn't trust that he would be able to control himself if the demon that resided in his mind tried to come back; he didn't trust that he would be able to stop himself from harming Maka.

But she did and that's what mattered.

Soul forcibly planted his lips on Maka's, causing a small squeak to sound from the back of her throat, and he imagined her being stunned from his sudden actions. However, she didn't remain stationary for long; he felt her relax against him and her lips slowly started to move as they took his bottom lip between them. Her hands found themselves wound around his neck as she pulled him closer to her, and his own found the small bones of her hips as he moved on top of her.

There were two emotions at play from what he could gather; there was her love for him as her fingers lightly traced the back of his neck, and then there was his desperation as he gripped her hips. He was afraid she would float off or flee from him if he were to let go; he needed her to stay put and show him that he wasn't the monster he believed he was. His body started to shake slightly as he silently released the tears he had been holding back. They hotly slid down his face until they mingled in with their kiss, the saltiness filling his taste buds as he flicked his tongue out to enter her mouth.

If Maka was aware of him crying, she didn't do or say anything as her hands found their way down the front his chest to the hem of his shirt. Little flames shot through him as they followed the path her hands made, and Soul swore his heart was on the brink of bursting. He didn't want their final night to happen like this, but it was and neither one was fighting it. He broke apart from her as she pulled his shirt off his body and her hands automatically flew across his chest. However, when he went back down to kiss her again, she firmly pressed her hand against his chest to hold him back.

"I know what you're doing," she breathed out. Soul's brows knitted together as he looked down at her and Maka licked her lips before speaking again. "You think one of us is going to die tomorrow so you're rushing this. I don't want that. If this is our last night together - which it isn't - I want us to take our time, okay?"

She reached up to rub her thumbs along the bottom of his eyes as she removed the left over tears that were there. "Do you really want our last time together to be rushed and sloppy?"

She had a point. His previous actions were far more desperate than he originally wanted them to be. If they were indeed spending their final night together, he wanted it to be one that they both remembered.

"We'll slow down."

Maka draped her arms around his neck and Soul gently laid down to rest on top of her, placing his forearms on either side of her head. He raised one hand to push back a few strands of ash blonde hair, and Maka closed her eyes as she hummed her appreciation. If she wanted to go slow, then he would grant her that wish. He didn't want her last memory of them together to be a rushed out sexual experience; he wanted her to remember him for who he was, for the person she had grown to love.

Soul swallowed the lump that formed in his throat before bending his head down to kiss the side of her neck. She shivered underneath his touch and he heard a small sigh escape her lips. He continued kissing her heated flesh as her hands moved along his back leaving trails of warmth in their wake and goosebumps pricked his skin as she went. His lips touched a sensitive spot on her and she moaned as her hips lightly, instinctively lifted from the bed to grind against him.

He had to stop for a while and collect his bearings as the heat rose in his lower abdomen and he felt his blood flow toward his erection. Thoughts of being with her swarmed his mind and he wanted nothing more than to take her then and there, but he would abide by her simple wish. He would allow their final night together to be slow and smooth, to be a moment that she would remember for years to come. It was going to be difficult, but he knew she would move on without him; she would find someone else to fill the void he left behind and he would become a memory.

It broke his heart, but it was the right thing for the both of them: for him to die in her place and to allow her to keep living her life. That was his final wish.

Soul's hands moved to the hem of Maka's sleep shirt and in a matter of seconds it was gone, tossed to the side where his own was before he left small kisses along her newly exposed flesh. He felt her softly toss and buck beneath him as his tongue rolled over a pert nipple, salivating the skin around it. He sucked and kneaded her breasts, being sure to pay special attention to each one in turn while Maka expressed her appreciation through mewls and moans.

Her objection was known when he left her chest to leave a wet trail of kisses from her diaphragm down to her navel until he reached the elastic of her underwear. Her legs were warm against his touch as he slid the undergarment off, and he relished in the way she shivered as he kissed up her flesh. His eyes never left hers as he kissed the inside of her thighs near her opening, and remained focused on her as his face drew closer to the heat emitting from there.

He flicked his tongue out to taste her and her small gasp rang in his ears like church bells as she threw her head back. Listening to the encouraging moan she gave him, Soul continued to flick his tongue over her entrance, swirling it around to pleasure her more before slipping a finger into her heat. He moved his finger in and out while keeping his mouth focused on sucking and licking her clit. As he felt her arousal grow and her walls tightening around his fingers, he slipped another one inside and continued his fluid motions.

Maka's hips bucked up one last time and his name spilled from her lips into the silence and the darkness like a silent prayer only meant for him. Her body shook and quaked as she rode out her climax. When he was sure she was finished and recovering, Soul removed his fingers from inside her and slid up her body to wait for when she was ready for more.

Her eyes fluttered open, and dark green stared up at him from behind small blonde lashes as she smiled. "You've really gotten better at that."

"Thanks." He looked down and closed his eyes. "I guess practice really does make perfect."

She giggled as her hands moved to grab his face and bring his lips to hers. Her tongue flicked over his bottom lip as she prompted him to open his mouth slightly to grant her entrance. As she moved her tongue along his, warmth crawled down his throat and flowed throughout his body until it tingled the tips of his fingers. His heart was about ready to burst as one of her hands lightly tugged on his hair while the other smoothed over the muscles on his back. He felt the love in her touches and each time her tongue reached out to grace his; it was all there.

It didn't take Maka long to use her toes to remove his boxers, freeing him from the confining material. The covers long removed from their sweaty bodies, the cool air wrapped around his erection and Soul moved slightly only to feel himself very close to the heat of her core. They broke away from each other for air, and as his crimson eyes met her dark green ones, he read the want and desire that was etched in them. She was craving him as much as he craved her and with their nether regions so close to each other, the anticipation was growing in the pair of them.

He positioned his cock in front of her entrance, sliding the head along her slit before slowly slipping inside of her. As he moved in and out, he felt her walls clench around him, tightening every time, and his mind grew fuzzy. Their breaths mingled together while their moans and grunts filled the silence of the loft. Her release came first, the sound of his name ringing in his ears as she moaned it out, and his own release came soon after that.

She wasn't going to die; he would make sure of that. If either one of them were going to meet their demise the next day, it was going to be him. The world needed her, it didn't need him.

* * *

Soul stood back as Maka bounded down the row of solar ships looking for one in particular. He wasn't sure what had compelled him to agree with going to help the Spartoi members, and a part of him was regretting the decision. It wasn't safe for him to be around people, especially being so near the ruins. What if he lost it again? What if someone lost their life because of him? What if he murdered the one person who was the most precious to him?

He glanced down at his boots, closed his eyes, and swallowed the bile taste that had crawled up his throat. Those type of thoughts didn't belong in his mind; he had passed the point of allowing the darkness to overtake him. There wasn't going to be a repeat of what had happened to Wes because he was stronger than the boy he had been back then. He had overcome more than his share of battles throughout the years; this was only going to be another one, but he would take it head on like the countless times before. He wasn't going to give in to the dark thoughts or the demon that resided in the depths of his mind. His old friends would come out of this unscathed, she would-

The sound Maka's boots scuffing on the pavement drove him out of his thoughts, and Soul looked up to see that she was staring at him.

"Are you coming or are you going to just stand there all day?" Her smile was kind and made his heart lurch.

As long as she was there, he could get through anything.

"Just haven't been here in a while. Sorta feels weird, ya know?" Soul said before walking down the row of ships to where she stood.

Seeing Grigori again brought back both good and bad memories. The gold and gray colors mixed together to remind him of the times he had spent with Maka during their youth and the times he had spent with Wes. They each held their own significance in his heart, but they mingled together to form one singular word: love. He had spent a majority of his time with the two people who had loved him the most thanks in part to the ship, and now he was coming full circle to fly her again with his first partner.

Soul felt something warm intertwine with his fingers, and he looked down to see Maka's hand in his. When his eyes traveled up her arm to meet her own gaze, a calmness washed over his body and rid him of the nerves. Even her smile was softer than normal as she watched him.

"You okay?" she asked after a few seconds.

He swallowed before nodding his head. "Yeah. You ready to go help the others?"

Maka gave his hand a light squeeze and stepped on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. "Yep."

He missed the warmth of her hand the moment it was gone, but followed suit as she went around the ship to the side she had long ago designated as hers. Sitting in the right hand seat, crimson eyes grazed over the control panel he hadn't seen in years. He almost wanted to wipe his hand over it just to remember how it all felt, but he held himself back; it wasn't really the proper moment to feel nostalgic. However, he did allow his hand to gently rub over the smooth gold of the helmet that sat beside him.

Looking at Maka, he saw the concern and worry etched in her green eyes, and a part of him thought it would be best if he left the cockpit. So much had happened between the last time he soul drifted with Maka and now, that he was positive his most significant memories had changed as well as her own. It was going to be like drifting for the first time all over again. The same stomach churning feeling would be happening to them as the others memories flashed for only them to know.

"Are you sure you want to do this? We don't have to go to the ruins if you don't want to, Soul. I-I know it'll probably be difficult for you, so I'm willing to-"

"Nah. I can handle this." He picked up the helmet and set it down on his head. "I've handled worse, remember?"

"Right."

Maka placed her own helmet on top of her head, and the memories came surging through his mind immediately. None of them were what he had been expecting, and they were each different from what he had seen years ago. He saw the first day they had met at the diner, their first kiss, the first time they had been together, and him fast asleep. Each of Maka's memories dealt with him being with her, and warmth and happiness spread throughout his chest at the mere thought.

The memories started to dissipate and Soul breathed a small sigh as he looked over at Maka. She was beginning to come out from her own experience, and he noted that his own elation was mirrored in her face.

Smiling he asked, "how was it?"

Her eyes fluttered open and she turned to face him, returning his own smile. "It was wonderful. You?"

"Same." A part of him wanted to ask what she had seen, but another part could have filled in the blanks without her having to say anything. "Ready to get this show on the road?"

"Ready as I'll ever be."

They went through the motions that had been ingrained in their minds years ago as they readied the ship. In no time they were lifting off the ground and navigating their way out of the ship port. Soul had forgotten how exhilarating flying was as they soared through the clouds. There was something about the openness that comforted Soul and made him breathe easier. His thoughts were able to expand over the vastness of the sky and disappear into nothingness. It was a habit he had picked up during their academy years, and the freeness he felt all those years ago washed over him. The tips of his fingers tingled as he reached across to hold Maka's hand. It was exciting to be experiencing the joy of flying again with Maka by his side.

He loved flying alongside Wes, but it was an entirely different feeling when Maka was with him. It felt more intimate and personal with her; she was aware of the memories he held most dear to his heart and he knew her own. There were no more secrets between the pair of them, and he was finally able to live his life happily with her. He didn't even think about the prospect of only one of them coming out of the mission alive. The fears from the previous night were at the back of his mind because, for the moment, it was only about him and Maka. There was nothing else in the world that could ruin it.

If he was going to spend the last happier moments of his life in a cockpit with Maka, he wasn't going to allow his thoughts and fears to ruin it.

They arrived to the ruins and parked their ship near the others before exiting the cockpit. The desert sun was beating down on them, the air was dry, and Soul already felt stuffy in his long sleeve shirt. It felt like they had walked into the middle of Satan's armpit. Glancing over at Maka, Soul noted that a small bead of sweat was already gracing her forehead to make its slow descent down her face. He didn't know how she was able to handle the heat while wearing pants, boots, a corset, and a long sleeved blouse; it must have been worse for her.

They were about to enter dangerous waters, and the heat was the least of their worries. A bad feeling burned in his heart as he imagined only one of them making it out of the desert alive, and his heart came to a decision before his mind did. He made his way over toward her and pulled her gun from the holster of her pants to place in her palm. Pressing the cool metal against her hand, he looked sternly into her eyes.

"I want you to promise me something."

He saw her throat move as she swallowed, and heard the uncertainty in her voice. "Anything."

"If I lose control of myself - if I change for any reason - I want you to be the one to put a bullet through my head, okay?"

Her eyes bulged and she backed away from him slightly at his words. Fear flashed in her dark green eyes, and he pressed the metal harder into her hand.

"If you don't, Black Star will, trust me." He paused to lick his lips. "I don't want it to be that way. I want you to be the one, okay? Just promise me that, please."

It took longer than he wanted, but Maka finally nodded and wrapped her fingers around the grip. "If it comes down to that, I will. But I doubt it will, okay? We'll get out of this alive, I promise."

He highly doubted it, but agreed if only to comfort her.

They made their way to where the battle was going on, the gunshots and shouts being enough to show them the way. As they passed the opening of the ruins, Soul felt a chill travel down his spine and little goosebumps crawled up his arms. The memory of his last mission with Wes flashed in his mind, but he tried to ignore it. Now wasn't the time to dwell on the past; he had to focus on the mission in front of him and keep his focus no matter what. One wrong move and that could be the end of him or Maka.

As they made their way closer to where Black Star and the others were, Soul felt an odd sensation fill his nerves. Something wasn't right; something inside of him started to stir and terror crawled over his skin. He felt the familiar tug and clawing at the back of his mind. However, he ignored it. He had experienced the same feeling before and it disappeared on its own; it was nothing special. He continued walking a bit longer before something different happened. The sounds of the battle before him were silenced as a small roar started in his ears. It became so unbearable that he had to pause.

Clutching his hands over his ears and screwing his eyes shut, he tried to ride out the sensations, but to no avail. They continued to go on no matter how hard he tried to stop them. Soul opened his eyes and blinked a few times to see that his vision was beginning to blur, and soon the blur turned to darkness. He tried to open his mouth to yell at Maka for help, but no sound came out, only a strangled squeak that was too silent for her to hear. He was losing it, he knew he was, but there was nothing he could do about it.

In no time, Soul's world turned to darkness and the dry desert air that was wrapped around his body was no more.

Soul was gone, and in his place there was a monster that had been begging to come out for years.

* * *

"Soul, you take care of the left side and I'll keep with the right. We'll meet in the middle and take care of the rest, okay?" Her question was met with an uncomfortable silence. It was dry and bitter like the sandy air around them. "Soul?"

She paused. Something didn't feel right; there was an unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach as fear washed over her body. Goosebumps crawled up her spine, alerting her to danger somewhere in the open desert, but it didn't have anything to do with the shadow figures in front of her. This new feeling dealt with something behind her, something that was coming from Soul.

A part of her didn't want to turn around; she wanted to ignore the threat in hopes it would disappear, but she couldn't do that. Her heart and mind were yelling at her to check on the man to make sure he was okay. She had a bad feeling that he wasn't, though, that if she turned around she would come face to face with a monster.

Maka's heart started racing and her palms felt sweaty as she gripped her gun tighter. She had made the promise already, but would she be able to go through with it? Could she really kill the man she loved in order to save her life? Did she really have it in her? There was only one way to find out.

Slowly and cautiously, she turned around with her eyes tightly closed. "Soul?" She had to give him one last chance to answer her; it was only fair, at least that's what she told herself. In reality, she knew it was because she wasn't ready to face the truth.

Releasing a shaky breath, Maka opened her eyes and automatically sucked the breath back in. Her worst fears couldn't have prepared her for what she saw. Instead of the familiar crimson staring back at her, Soul's eyes were pitch black; the flesh surrounding his eye sockets were dark and sunken in, causing a chill to run down her spine. His face was twisted up demonically, his sharp teeth on full display for her to see as he grinned. Her stomach flipped, and Maka felt like she was going to be sick; the scene before her was grotesque and the product of her worst nightmares.

"Soul?"

Every muscle in her body was screaming at her to run the other way, but she reluctantly took a step forward and regretted it immediately. Her voice and movement were like a trigger as his head snapped in her direction and a snarl released from his mouth. Black wisps flew out from Soul's scar underneath his shirt as he threw out one of his arms, and it wrapped around his arm, completely shrouding the limb. Maka watched in a trance as the smoke continuously moved around until it disappeared to reveal a red and black scythe blade attached to his arm.

However, she didn't have enough time to react as Soul lunged forward, swinging the scythe blade out to swipe at her. She dodged him just in time as the blade barely nipped the top of her head, and Maka stumbled onto the ground. She didn't waste any time as she stood up and ran away from him. Unlike the other humans who were infected with the black wisp, Soul appeared to only be after her as he followed her movement; he didn't try to attack Black Star who had swooped Maka up into his arms to move her away from him.

"What are you doing?" she yelled at him.

"What does it look like? Saving your life, getting you away from that monster!"

Black Star shielded Maka away from Soul with her body, but she was still able to see him if she moved to the side. She noticed that whatever Star had done, it caused Soul to stop his chase. He stood still in the middle of the desert, snapping his teeth at air.

"What happened?" Star asked after a few seconds.

"I don't know," she whispered.

She honestly didn't; one minute he had been fine and the next he changed. Her eyes wandered over the desert, searching for something, anything that would have caused him to change so suddenly. However, there was nothing but sand. It wasn't until she noticed the ruins that she caught what might have been the cause. There was a good deal of distance between her and the dark opening, but she still saw it. The sun glinted off of something metal, and for the quickest of moments she caught the underside of magenta, and she knew what it was.

"The ruins," she breathed out.

Star turned to look at her like she was crazy, one eyebrow lifted. "What are you going on about?"

"The ruins." Maka pointed toward the place in question. "There's something that lives there, and it's the reason Soul's acting strange. A cyborg attacked him when we were in the academy, and ever since he hasn't been the same. That's probably why he's changed now."

"Spartoi has searched that place all over and we've never been able to find any cyborg."

"No, look! It's right there!"

Star's eyes followed in the direction she was pointing, but he shook his head. "Maka, I don't see anything." He placed his hand over her forehead. "Are you feel alright? Are you seeing things? Maybe you should go home. I'll take care of Soul."

This caught her attention as she pushed away from his chest, her green eyes wild. "No! You can't kill him!"

"I'm not gonna kill him. I'm just gonna put him out of his misery."

"By killing him!"

"Then what do you expect us to do, Maka? Leave him to you to take care of? As if. He was trying to kill you with that scythe blade of his."

His words fell on deaf ears as a thought occurred to her. Soul wasn't completely lost, not yet at least. He wasn't acting like the other humans who had the same black smoke surrounding them, which led her to guess that he was still holding onto his humanity. There was still a part of him that she could reach. She only had to try.

Maka untangled herself from Star's arms and crawled away from him to stand up. He quickly followed suit and grabbed her arm just as Soul turned his attention back on her.

"What are you doing?" Black Star asked.

"I'm going to save him so he doesn't have to die," Maka said like it was obvious.

She refused to allow anyone to kill Soul, especially when she knew there was a chance of helping him. She wasn't ready to lose him because of another one of her mistakes; if she hadn't insisted that Lord Death allow them to fly out to help Spartoi, Soul wouldn't be in this mess again. He wouldn't have to lose himself to the darkness. She had seen what it did to him with Wes, and it was a side of Soul she didn't want him to have to experience again.

"He'll kill you before you can do anything," Star warned.

Maka stared at him with determination in her eyes. "I'm not going to let that happen, and neither will Soul."

"Are we seeing the same person? He's insane, Maka! He isn't in the right state of mind! It's dangerous and you will-"

"I can get through to him! Soul is still human underneath, and he's still in control. I know he is. I'm not going to give up on him just because everyone else has." She yanked her arm out of Star's grip and glared at him. "I'm going to save him; Soul won't have to die."

Black Star didn't rebut her small speech, so Maka took that as a sign that he wasn't going to fight her on it. Turning to face the man in question, she stared at him for a while to see what he would do next, but Soul remained in one spot. He was still gnashing his teeth at her, but he didn't move forward when she walked toward him; his scythe blade remained still with each step she took. Hope boiled in the pit of her stomach as she slowly inched toward him and he still didn't lunge for her. She was able to get half way before he had any reaction.

The scythe scratched the side of her arm, cutting the material of her sleeve, and blood slowly ooze to the opening to seep down her arm. It stung, but she continued to walk toward him. She tried to dodge every one of his attacks, receiving only a few cuts on her arm and face, but it wasn't enough to create any real damage. After all of her struggling and dodging, Maka finally made it to him. She pressed herself against his chest, firmly holding the arm with the blade away from her, and cupped her other hand around his cheek.

"Soul. I know you're still in there." Her words went unheard as he tried to take a snap at her arm, but she quickly moved it away from him and placed it on his chest instead. "Please, listen to me. This isn't you. You have to come back to me or Star is going to kill you. I can't-I can't lose you, Soul. Not like this. I don't-"

She had to dig her boots into the sand as Soul fought against her, his teeth coming dangerously close to her throat. Maka took a while to catch her bearings before speaking again, this time with more determination in her voice.

"I'm not giving up on you. I meant what I said the night you told me the truth about Wes. I will never stop believing in you, and I know you can fight through this. You're stronger than the darkness ever will be."

There was still no change in Soul's demeanor and Maka slowly started to fear the worst. If she wasn't able to get through to him, he was going to die - she would probably die before him. She had made the promise to Soul that it would be her who ended his life if he lost control, but now she didn't think she would be able to. She loved the man before her too much to end his life just because he wasn't responding to a word she said; it didn't feel right to kill him when he wasn't in the right state of mind.

Soul fought against her once again, and Maka braced herself as her grip loosened on his arm. The scythe blade only scraped against her leather corset, but it was too close a call for comfort, so she made sure to place a vice grip on his arm. Without turning around, she felt Star's eyes watching them as he battled the shadowy figures behind her. She knew it would only take one slice of her from the blade before Star shot a bullet through his head; he wouldn't even hesitate or second guess himself.

However, she continued her battle of getting through to him.

"I know you're still in there! I know you can hear me, so please come back to me!"

She blinked as the tears stung the back of her eyes. Her mind was swarming with every single what if possibility, and the fear continued to boil up in the pit of her stomach. She felt it travel through her bloodstream as horror filled her. If she didn't fight harder, she was going to lose Soul. Her heart clenched at the thought of him dead in her arms because she had insisted they come out to help. She was going to lose him and it was all her fault, again, but this time it was going to be a permanent lost.

She wasn't ready for that.

Maka leaned up and gently kissed his lower jaw before resting her head on his chest. "Please, I can't lose you. I just can't. If you die, I die, and I don't want that. I want us to be happy together, but that won't happen unless you fight against the darkness. Please come back to me. I don't want to live without you. I love you too much to lose you. You have to come back back to me, you just have-Soul!"


	10. Fire Sets Me Free

The last thing he remembered was doubling over onto his knees and clutching at his scar while Maka spoke to him. The sound that had replaced the world he knew before was haunting and ruptured throughout his body; it had made him feel uncomfortable and anxious, like there was static and tingles crawling all over his body. He saw Maka's mouth moving, but he couldn't decipher her words. He had to blink a few times, little dark specks clouding his vision, and then he had blacked out soon after that.

The sun was no longer beating down on him; the heat that was warming his skin had disappeared, and in its place was bone-chilling cold. His feet were no longer planted on the hard sand - in fact, they weren't planted on anything. His body felt like it was floating in thin air, there was nothing keeping him stable, yet he couldn't move his body. His muscles had stopped functioning; no matter how hard he tried to tell his body to move, it refused. It felt like he was having an out of body experience, far too similar to the last time.

His eyes snapped open as the memory came flooding back; the same exact thing had happened on his final mission with Wes

Soul began to panic; if he was floating in the darkness then that meant Maka was in danger, like his brother had been. He refused to let her die at his own hands because he couldn't control the monster inside; he had to find a way back to her. His eyes darted all around him, trying to find a way out, but came up empty in their search. There was no light emitting from beyond, only the purest of black surrounded him, and his heart began to race. He was completely alone; there was no one here to worry about him or try to help him out; even the small voice in his head had gone silent. Once again, he had to depend on himself.

However, he wasn't going to let that stop him. He would find a way out of the darkness and back to Maka - he just had to. It didn't matter if he got himself killed in the process; as long as Maka was alive and well, that's what mattered to him. He loved her, and would do anything for her; losing her was the worst case scenario, and he didn't know if he would remain sane if she were to die. He refused to let her die like Wes had; her fire was going to burn for all of eternity if he had any say in it. It didn't matter how hard he tried to push his body to move, he remained stationed in one spot, and it pissed him off to no end.

He just needed to get back to her.

Soul was close to giving up when he heard the familiar haunting laugh of the little red demon, and the darkness dissolved so that he was laying in the red room. The same scratchy jazz music was playing on the gramophone, but this time there was more furniture. He found that he was able to move, and looked at his familiar yet new surroundings.

There was a small black round table with a matching tall chair sitting next to it, and beyond that Soul noticed a shiny black piano. Instead of the lonesome lamp, there were tall black candelabras that twisted in the middle scattered around the room, each carrying a single blue candle. Looking down, he noticed his garments were different; instead of his regular clothes, he was wearing a black pinstripe suit with a red undershirt.

"Ah, Soul. So nice of you to join me," came the little imp's gravelly voice. Soul pushed himself off the guard, searching for the little imp so he could wring his neck out, but came up short.

"Where the fuck are you?" he called out.

"It appears you still have many questions for me, but you should know the answer by now." It sounded like the voice was coming from all directions making it difficult for him to pinpoint its true location. "I can be anywhere in your mind, and I can appear at anytime. Sometimes I'm in the darkest confines of your nightmares, and other times I'm lurking in the background when you're awake. Really, location is no problem with me. You should know that better than anyone."

He didn't have time for the little imp's games, he needed to back to Maka. "Stop playing around and show yourself." There was a small crack, and Oni appeared directly in front of Soul. "Now tell me how to get the fuck out of here."

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. You only want to get out of here to go back to that little dame of yours, Maka." Oni twiddled his fingers as he spoke. "I believe I should tell you that she doesn't care about you. Pretty sure I've heard her say you'd be better off dead so why don't you stay here and fulfill that wish for her."

He had heard the same speech before and it had stung him, but he wasn't going to fall for it this time. He knew Maka, and she wasn't the person Oni claimed she was. She cared about Soul, and would do anything to keep him alive. She didn't want him to die; that wasn't his Maka.

"Save the bullshit for someone else, it isn't going to work this time," he growled.

The imp clucked his tongue and wagged his finger in front of Soul. "There's no need to be rude, little Soul. I'm only trying to save you the trouble of saving that girl of yours. Wouldn't want you risking your life for a dame like that."

Soul rolled his hand into a fist, and pounded the floor in front of Oni. "I know Maka better than you ever will, and she isn't like that. Stop spouting lies and tell me how to get out of here."

Oni's face fell, and he lightly shook his head. "Not even I know the answer to that."

Soul raised a skeptical eyebrow. Part of him wanted to believe Oni, but the other part didn't; he was fully aware of Oni's tricks by now - years of experiencing them had taught him that - but he felt like this wasn't a trick. Glaring at the little imp, he tried to decipher if his words were true, reading his facial expression and body movement, and found there was nothing off putting about either.

Oni was telling the truth.

He licked his lips, and looked around the room. If there was no way out, then that meant Maka was in danger, but that couldn't be. Every room had to have an exit and he needed to find the one for this particular room. He was able to escape the first time around, but that was with the help of the little imp. Even so, he was trapped in his own mind so surely there had to be a way out, he wasn't that cynical.

Soul pushed himself off the floor and started walking around the room, feeling behind the curtains for some sign of a door or an exit. There had to be something that led to his exit out of there. Pulling each of the dark red curtains from the wall, he searched, but found nothing behind any of them. He kept running into dead ends, and his nerves were starting to grow tired of the madness. A part of him felt like all of it was Oni's doing while another part of him worried that maybe he was right; there really was no exit, and Maka was heading to her death.

He passed behind the piano, and the little imp snapped his fingers with a loud crack. Whirling around, he saw Oni lying on top of the piano and staring at him. He lowly growled in frustration, and went back to what he was doing. After a while, Oni began to snap his fingers to the scratchy tune on the gramophone, and Soul tried his hardest to ignore the imp. His mind told him that he was only doing it to get a rile out of him, and he refused to let the demon get the best of him. However, after a few minutes, he failed.

"What the hell do you want?" he yelled, turning around to glare at Oni. "You already have your wish. Maka's gonna die if I stay in here any longer, so what else could you possibly want?"

"Hmm," Oni hummed. He stopped snapping, sat up, and started nodding his head to the music. "I want you to play for me." At Soul's confused look, Oni gently knocked on the top of the piano. "Like old times. I'm sure you remember that."

Bile crawled up his throat as he stared down at the piano. Now that he had a closer look at it, it did remind him of the same one he had spent hours practicing on as his father listened in the background. Memories of his father belittling him flashed before him, and hatred filled his body. There was a reason he had always wanted to be an Aerodynamics pilot, and that reason was the way his father had treated him. Even Wes was able to see that he didn't want to be a famous musician like his father which was why he applied to the academy. Soul's brother had thought it was the perfect way for their father to see the truth, but the only thing that resulted from it was his father practically disowning Soul.

"And I'm sure you can remember that I  _don't_ like playing the piano."

"Mmm, yes. I do recall that. However, if I'm not mistaken you are stuck here while the girl you love is being brutally murdered by the demon possessing your body."

"You're saying that to say what, exactly?" Soul asked.

Oni shrugged, his claws extending elegantly as he did so. "Just that I feel it could pass the short time you and I have together," The devilish grin crept back on his face, "because you know Black Star is going to kill you. Put you out of your misery for killing one of his best friends. That's what you always wanted, isn't it? Your friend turned enemy to be the one who kills you. I'm sure you saw it from the beginni-"

"Shut up!" Soul turned and leaned on the piano, glaring at the demon. "Whether you like it or not, I'm going to find a way out of here. Maka isn't going to die! She's stronger than you think she is, and she knows how to handle herself. She does love me and I love her. So I'll be damned if anything happens to her! Do I make myself clear, you little bastard?"

Suddenly, warmth spread along his chest starting from his heart and going outward. It was weird; it felt like someone was pressing against him, but no one was touching him as far as he could see. His other senses weren't responding to anything around him; he didn't feel the piano's smooth surface under his palm nor did he hear the scratchy jazz music. Glancing at Oni, he saw the fear cross the demon's face, and from the corner of his eye, he saw the room start to break away.

He turned away from Oni and the piano, to watch as the room disappeared. The walls were cracking around him, and the small fragments dissolved into the blackness that he had been in at first. The ground below him remained until there was no more wall to dissolve, and then the floor along with the contents of the room mimicked the cracking and dissolving. Soul didn't know what was happening so he turned around to ask the imp.

"What's going on?"

But he couldn't hear the words that were coming out of Oni's mouth. The only sound that met his ears was that of silence. There were no sounds coming from around him; he felt like he was alone, but at the same time he didn't. It felt like there was another presence with him. He didn't feel like he was in the ballroom or in the black void; he felt like he was somewhere else entirely.

The last bit of the room dissolved away, and it was only Soul and Oni floating in the void from before. Oni was still silent to him, but he heard another voice calling out to him. It sounded familiar; the female voice rang out, but it didn't touch his ears. Instead, he felt it reaching for his heart, and grasping it. His body recognized the voice before his mind could, and he watched as his arm reached out blindly.

"Soul!" Maka called out.

His heart leaped at the sound of her voice. "Maka!"

Looking in the direction his arm was reaching toward, he saw the faintest hint of light coming out of the darkness. He didn't know what was leading him toward it, but he slowly began to push himself forward. He felt like he was swimming as he went through the void; there was a small current pushing him while another one tried to hold him back, but he didn't give up. He needed to get back to Maka, and if he was hearing her voice, that could only mean good news. It  _had_ to mean good news.

"Soul!" he heard voice call out again. As he grew closer to the light, her voice began to hit his ears rather than his heart. "Please, you have to listen to me! This isn't you! The person in here," he felt a small palm press against his chest, "is who you are. Please, come back to me."

He continued to follow the voice and the light, fighting against all odds to make it back to her. As he began to get closer to the light, he felt the undercurrent that was pushing him away, forcibly hitting him. It became harder for him to continue forward, and it took all his strength to keep going. However, she kept talking to him; her words acted as a guide, and motivated him to continue in his fight to get to her. He had to get back to Maka no matter what. He needed to make sure she was safe and sound, and that he hadn't hurt her. Whatever entity was possessing him, wasn't who he was, and he would fight against it as long as that meant he could be with her.

He needed his happy ending.

"Soul, please come back to me. I love you."

It was the small crack in her voice as she spoke that made him fight harder. It took all his strength to make it back to her. The light grew brighter and brighter with every single one of his strides. He wasn't far. He only needed to give it one more push before he was finally back in his body.

He closed his eyes from the brightness, and the next thing he felt was a whooshing sensation as he thrusted back into his body. He must have been out for a while because it felt strange to be back; the feel of organs thrumming in his body, muscles relaxing and contracting, and the sounds of his familiar world were both familiar and unfamiliar. His brain was still fuzzy as it tried to catch up with the rest of him. He was vaguely aware of the person standing in front of him, their hand firmly placed over his heart, and their other hand resting on his arm.

"Maka! Forget Soul and get your ass over here! We need you more than that bastard does!" he heard Black Star shout some distance away.

Soul groaned and started to open his eyes. The hot sun was shining down in the desert, obscuring his vision, and Soul had to blink a few times to get used to it. The world around him was blurry as his vision tried to refocus. The hand on his chest floated up to gently cradle his cheek, and Soul instinctively nuzzled into it. Maka smiled up at him, and love and warmth washed over his body.

"Soul," she breathed out. "You came back. I thought I had lost you."

He pulled her into a hug, causing to squeak in surprise. He didn't bother to ask her what had happened because it didn't matter. He was able to make it back in time, and she was alive. That was all he needed to know. Instead, he relished in her steady heartbeat as it thrummed against his chest, the warmth of her skin radiating through her top, and the faint smell of vanilla from her shampoo. They were all signs that she was alive.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in her hair.

"For what?"

"For losing myself."

He felt her shake her head a little in protest. "Don't worry about it. You came back, and that's all that matters."

They battle around them continued to go on as they stood like that for a few minutes. It wasn't until Black Star yelled at them again to break it up that they joined the others, fighting alongside each other as they tried to defeat the shadowy figures. Soul and Maka fought practically in synch with each other, their combat training from the academy still present even years later. It was difficult, but they were able to win in the long run while only losing a few of their comrades.

* * *

Maka kneeled down to dip a towel in the water basin that was sitting on the floor next to her before standing back up to rub it along the small cuts that littered Soul's chest. He had suffered a few injuries from the black, shroudy substance that had come out of his scar and the battle afterward. The ignorant man had refused to go see Doctor Stein when they arrived home which left a disgruntled girlfriend with having to do the dirty work.

"Ah, fuck!" Soul yelled when Maka pressed the towel too hard on his skin.

She huffed as she backed away from him, crossing her arms. "Would you rather Stein did this instead?"

"Fuck that," he growled. "The man doesn't even know how to stitch me up properly."

"Then hold still, and stop complaining.".

She bent back over to  _gently_ dab at the cuts along his skin, paying extra attention to the larger ones. They stood out on his tan skin like crescent moons kissing his skin, shining brighter in contrast to the color of his flesh. Each time she placed her hand on his chest, she felt him flex under her touch which made her smile on the inside. His muscles were smooth as she guided her fingertips along it, and she was able to make out the distinct steady beating of his heart. It made her own beat in rhythm to it because it was a reminder that he was alive; that she hadn't lost him as she feared she would have.

Seeing him sitting on the edge of his bed with no shirt on felt like an entirely new experience to her even though she had seen him naked plenty of times before. This was a different type of intimacy compared to the past times, one that neither of them had been able to achieve. They both knew that the prospect of sex was going to happen, so the anticipation and excitement built up between them, but this was alluring in a nonsexual way. Her touches weren't filled with desire, but gentle and careful instead;he trusted her over medical doctors to care for him.

Sighing, she wiped away the last bit of grime off of him and backed away to look at her work. She made sure every inch of his skin was clean and that none of the cuts had potential to become infected because she overlooked it. His chest was smooth, save for the few scars that littered along the larger, bisecting one, and she smiled as she spared a few more seconds to marvel at his physique. For someone who rarely worked out and was a lazy-ass on a daily basis, it was a wonder how he was able to remain in shape. Maka suspected that he really wasn't as lazy as he put himself out to be.

"Are you done checking me out?" he asked.

Maka jumped as she quickly threw her hands behind her back and felt the blush as it formed along her cheeks. It took her longer than it should have to realize what he had meant exactly, but the embarrassment remained. "Yep, you look fine- I mean you're good- Clean! Shit!"

She quickly looked away from him and pouted; she hated the effect he had on her when she was embarrassed or shy around him. Her words always became a jumbled mess and she screwed up the situation in some way because of it. She secretly wished her mind was able to get a handle on these type of things, but no matter how often she tried, it still refused.

The bed springs creaked as Soul stood up and his low chuckle grated on her nerves, indicating that he had put two and two together. The urge to hit him upside the head to teach him a lesson on not laughing at her was strong, but she held it back. Based on past experiences, that never amounted to anything, and she was an adult now. There were things she used to do that wouldn't be seen as ladylike or likeable in general if she were to do them now. Besides, he deserved better than someone who was a replica of her past self, someone who was abusive for no apparent reason.

His arm snaked around her waist to pull her closer to him, prompting a small squeak of surprise to escape from her mouth as she came in contact with his broad chest. Leaning down to kiss her temple, she felt little shockwaves run down her spine and travel through the rest of her body. She noticed that they were far too close to each other for two people who were supposed to be recovering. Her hand curled in slightly as it rested on his bare chest, and she had to fight back tears as she felt the comfort within the small embrace.

He was alive and with her; it was enough for her to forget about his injuries and hold on to him.

"You're cute when you get all flustered," he whispered against her hair.

"Shut up," she mumbled.

Soul's hand left her waist to ruffle her hair before the warmth of his body disappeared completely from her side. Maka twirled around and clutched his wrist between her hands, holding on for dear life. She stared at the floor rather than him, but she didn't have to to know that he was watching her in confusion - that his snowy brows were knitted together, his pink lips turned upside in a deep frown, his crimson eyes staring at her wordlessly as he waited for to say something. But what was she supposed to say? That she had been afraid of losing him when he wasn't himself? That there was moment where she had believed Black Star was really going to kill him?

Fighting back the urge to spill her heart out, Maka glanced up and smiled at him. "I just want to tell you I love you."

He cocked an eyebrow up, but didn't call her bluff. "I love you, too." She released his wrist before he continued. "I'm gonna shower, okay?"

"Mhm," Maka nodded, her head hanging low.

She felt his hesitation as his feet shuffled back to face her, but he didn't say anything. Instead, they stood there in silence for a while before he finally turned around and made his way back toward the bathroom. When she heard the door softly close behind him, the sound of the knobs turning and the water running, she stumbled backwards and fell onto the bed. Her chest pained as she pulled her legs up onto the mattress and rested her forehead between her knees, allowing the tears she had been holding in to freely fall. They left small stains on her skirt and tights, but she didn't care.

There had been a brief moment when she had been trying to get through to him that she had lost all hope. His scythe blade had came striking down as he aimed it at her torso, and if Star hadn't rushed forward to stop the attack, they'd both be dead. However, it was Black Star's words that had left her blood pounding in her ears. The promise that if Soul tried to kill her again, he'd put a bullet between his eyes, no hesitation and no questions asked. That had been the moment the reality of their situation had hit her; either them could have died at any moment.

It wasn't so much the fear of losing her better half because that wasn't what they were to each other in the slightest. If anything he was the person she refused to live without in her life. Soul had slowly become one of the most important people in her life and she couldn't imagine life without him.

Her chest pained even more as she pressed her forehead more into her knees and release a shaky breath. Maka was being ridiculous. Soul was still with her; she hadn't lost him, but she had been damn close to doing so. She didn't know what she would do if she were never able to stare into his deep crimson eyes or feel his warm breath tickling her small hairs as he slept. He was her beacon of hope on a foggy day, the person who looked out for safety when she was being reckless, her warm blanket when the cold was too unbearable. Her love for him had grown too strong; it scared her just how close she was to losing him, how close she had been from never seeing the man again.

A strong hand squeezed her knee, and Maka squeaked upon hearing the quiet loft. The water was no longer running and from the cracks between her thighs she was able to make out a pair of tanned legs with a towel wrapped around a waist.

"You okay?" Soul asked.

Maka quickly wiped away the tears that were sitting on her face before looking up at him and giving what she hoped was a believable smile. "Mhm, everything's fine."

He didn't seem convinced as his brows furrowed together; his tone sounded like a warning when he said her name. She chewed on the inside of her lip as she stared up at him; he knew she was lying - he was probably reading it in her eyes right now. The only problem was that she wasn't sure if she should tell him or not. It was a big deal, but at the same time it wasn't. Turning her attention back to the floor, she thought about the events from earlier, how close she had been to losing him, and trying to decide if he should really know how she felt.

Hadn't they promised to be honest with the other? To tell them when they were having a difficult time with a situation or didn't know what to do? Didn't Soul deserve to know how much she loved him and would miss him if anything were to happen to him?

"Maka," he said in a pained whisper. She glanced up to see the hurt in his burgundy eyes and her own heart swelled up.

Maybe it was better to be honest in this type of situation.

"I thought I was going to lose you for a while there," she whispered as she looked back down. "I thought-I was worried Black Star was going to kill you. He had even threatened to do so, and I-"

She broke off as her heart broke at the mere thought of him dying, and she bit down on her bottom lip to prevent her sob from escaping. It was too much to handle, too much to take in, the very thought of living in world where Soul wasn't with her. To imagine her life without the man standing in front of her was not something she needed.

The bed sank in next to her as Soul sat down and wrapped his arm around her waist to pull her closer to him. "Hey, it's okay. I get it. I had the same fear a few nights ago."

He cupped his hand around her cheek to make her look at him while she draped her legs over the bed. His thumb rubbed soothing circles on her warm flesh; small tingles graced her skin beneath his touch, and she closed her eyes as she leaned into it. It felt like home: being beside him, feeling his body heat radiating through her clothes. She was able to breath and calm down in his embrace. They were together, they had made it through the storm, she should be happy.

Clutching herself closer to his chest, she breathed him in; he smelled of citrus, vanilla, and wood from the body wash he used. Sometimes she liked to open the bottle when she was showering because the aroma made it feel like he was in there with her. Running her hand over his bare chest, she felt the smoothness of his skin and the small white hairs that graced it. His chest steadily rose and fell, and faintly heard his heart beating underneath. She softly kissed his chest before turning her attention back to him.

"I'm glad you're with me. You know that, right?" she whispered.

"Yeah, I do." His hand rose to push a few strands of her hair behind her ear and kissed her temple, sending small shivers down her spine. "I'm glad you're here with me, too. I'm especially glad that nothing happened to either of us back there. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Probably go insane," she smiled as his low chuckle vibrated against her chest.

"Probably."

They stared at each other for a few seconds, his deep burgundy eyes staring into hers causing her heart to beat wildly. She loved him more than anyone else in the world; she would do anything for him. Out of everyone else in the world, they had chosen to remain beside the other no matter what. Even when they were at the academy and things became rough between the pair, they had stuck together. Through every fight, every turmoil, every word that was said in anger they remained true to the other. There was no one else she could see herself with besides him.

"I love you," she said as she stroked his cheek.

"I love you too."

She pulled him down for a kiss, locking their lips together and slanting her mouth against his. Her heart burst as his hand grasped her hip and pulled her onto his lap. The desire to devour him and seek refuge within him was strong as her hands wound themselves in his hair. They took turns biting and sucking the others lip, their moans mingling together, and after a while, Maka felt his erection press against her rear.

Ridding herself of her shyness, she lightly rubbed her ass against his, her hips circling in her sitting position as she pressed down on him. Soul released a guttural moan, throwing his head back as he broke their kiss. When he glanced back at her, she noted the desire scorching his red eyes and she felt her own desire peak. She slid her thighs against each other to feel the moisture that was slowly building there.

Soul must have felt the same way because he reversed their positions right away. He hovered over on top of the bed, his towel miracuriously still on, staring at her intently.

"You don't waste any time, do you?" he asked.

Biting down on her bottom lip, she trailed her hand down his chest until she came to the little white hairs that disappeared beneath the towel. "You're one to talk. You came out in only a towel. What did you expect to happen?"

He smirked and leaned down. "Exactly what you expected."

He pressed their mouths together in a forceful kiss, her heart stopping at the abruptness, before moving away to rid her of the clothes she had on. While he worked on removing her skirt, stockings, and boots, she worked on her corset and blouse. In no time she was completely naked, sprawled out on the bedsheet underneath as she waited for him to lay on top of her.

He kissed up her leg, leaving a few bites as he went, and came dangerously close to her entrance. Sucking in deep breath in expectation, she awaited the touch that never came, as he simply kissed her instead and continued moving up her stomach until he was eye level with her. The intensity of his eyes made her breath come out harder and her chest grew heavier; the warm liquid in her lower abodmen churned with anticipation and want as his hand moved between them to rid himself of the towel.

She felt the head of his dick slid up her entrance, spreading the moisture from herself around his tip before he slowly entered her. Gasping at the sensation of being filled, she clutched her hands on his back and waited for him to fully enter her. She moaned out as he slipped in and out of her, his pace slow and steady at first so she could get used to it before he started to pick up the pace. Her hips rolled up to meet his every thrust, hear spread across her body as he pressed himself closer to her, and her heart rate picked up speed as they moved with one another.

Soul rested his forehead on hers as he moved within her, their breaths mingled together as she felt his lips ghost over hers. She wanted to mold them together, taste the sweat and saliva that glistened in them, but instead placed her hands in the nape of his hair to hold him in place. Staring into his lust-filled eyes, her stomach clenched, her heart beating out of control; the way the city lights shone on his face was intimate, hooding his face and creating a mystical aura around him.

In that moment, she felt his soul reaching out to her. It wrapped itself around her like a warm blanket on a cold winter's night, surrounding her in the safety and security that she had craved for so many years. He understood her better than anyone else, and he would never do anything to hurt her; he was the one person she could fully trust. His heart was hers just as much as hers was his. They saw each other as equals and chose each other above everyone else. Soul was her soulmate, her one true love.

He thrust into her, pressing their hips roughly together, causing both to groan out in pleasure before he moved back out. Maka rolled her hips up to meet his, allowing him to rub against her clit as she moaned out. Body on fire, she felt her core clench around him and her abs tighten as she grew closer to her own climax. Her mewls and moans rose a few octaves as she dug her nails into his back, her mind becoming fuzzy.

Her moan came out heavy and rough, his name raw as it slipped from her lips; she dug her nails into his flesh as her entire body shook. She rode out the waves of pleasure that rocked her body while he slowly thrust himself into her, trying to claim his own release. Once they subsided, she opened her eyes to see him watching her intently, his mouth slightly agape as she noted the curiosity hidden behind his crimson eyes. Her heart swelled at the thought of him watching her as she orgasmed, and a small smile spread on her lips as she watched his own. His face screwed up as if in pain as she felt his hot seed spurt inside of her; the sound of her name as he moaned it out made the fire in her stomach burn brighter.

Soul collapsed on top of her, his head resting on her shoulder as his warm breath hit her already heated breasts. They remained laying there for a little while longer as they came down from their highs, both wrapped up in the others arms. Raising her hand, Maka smoothed his sweaty bangs away from his face to reveal his serene face. Pride shot through her body at the thought of how perfectly they contrasted with each other, his tan skin against her light skin. Deep down, she was certain that they were made for each other and would have found the other whether they had met at age sixteen or twenty-two.

Running her hand down his cheek, Soul opened his eyes and stared up at her, a silly lopsided grin playing on his lips. "So do you think I did a good job?"

She giggled and shook her head. "You're always good."

He rose up to kiss her temple before he kissed her lips and smiled. "Wonderful. That's what I like to hear."

"You're ridiculous," she said as she gently pushed him away.

His eyes lit up as he laughed and grabbed her hand to touch it to his lips. There was something different about him compared to when they had left the apartment earlier and the weeks before. He was livelier and happier compared to the sullen and depressed man she had seen when arriving back in Death City.

Soul leaned back down to kiss her cheeks and forehead again before holding himself up on one hand to stare at her.

"Your aura has changed since we first met, you know," she whispered. Taking her finger, she gently traced it along the scar on his chest as she waited for him to speak.

"Oh. Really? And how's that?" His hot breath warmed her face and she felt the familiar tug at the corners of her mouth.

"You're happier." She raised her eyes to his. "I like that."

Maka caught the faint blush that graced his cheeks before he buried his face in her neck and the warmth that spread throughout her caused her smile to grow. After so long, they were together. They had accomplished so much because of the other and would accomplish so much more as time went on. His darkness had only been the beginning.

Soul kissed her neck before whispering, "I am too," against her skin.

A few minutes passed and he removed his face away from the crook of her neck so that his deep crimson eyes glanced down at her. "I wrote another song." He paused. "Actually it is a song for you this time. The last one had nothing to do you and more to do with what I was feeling at the time… I'm sorry about that."

"No, it's okay. Don't apologize. I still loved it."

He reached between them to wrap his fingers around her hand and brought up to his lips to lay a kiss on her knuckles. "It's not okay because you're worth so much more than a shitty song."

"Soul, it wasn't shitty-"

"Maka," he cut in. "Would you like to hear your song or not?"

She nodded in response, and Soul rolled off the bed to walk over to where the piano remained stationed by the window. Maka readjusted herself, trying to get a better view of him playing for her. In the back of her mind she found it amusing that he didn't even bother slipping into boxers, that he was literally going to play her a song stark naked. Clapping a hand over her mouth, she tried to suppress the giggle that bubbled up. She didn't want to embarrass him or make him nervous.

The piano's lullaby was sweet as it filled the room; calm washed over her as she closed her eyes. It glided over her skin like a satin blanket, gracing her ears the same way the pianist whispered to her when they were in bed. It was a lovely song, and she could feel the love hidden in it as it touched her heart. This wasn't only her song, it was also  _their_  song.

Somehow he had captured their relationship in one song perfectly. She heard the turmoil they had to undergo before finally becoming a real couple, the heartache that the battle had brought to both of them, and the love they mutually felt for the other, all in the same song. It was them, and she loved all of it.

Maka opened her eyes once the music stopped and saw him watching her from behind a curtain of white hair.

"So what'd you think?" he asked.

"I loved it."

He picked his head up so he wasn't hiding anymore and stood up from the bench to walk back over to her.

"Do you play naked for all your customers?" she asked with a sly grin.

"Only for the special ones," he commented. "But admit it, you enjoy the view."

"I do indeed," she said, reaching out with both hands to grip his arm and pull him back down onto the bed.

They adjusted themselves into more comfortable positions, Soul lying on top of Maka with her legs on either side of his. His heart thrummed against her as he pressed his chest closer to hers, and he wrapped perfectly around her body, warming the parts of her that had grown cold as she listened to his soothing music. Neither one made a move or spoke during the small moment; they only basked in the light that was each other, relishing in their closeness.

Maka smoothed a hand through his hair, causing the man to close his eyes and hum a little as she did. Her own mouth formed a small smile as she watched him slowly falling asleep against her; he reminded her of a puppy who enjoyed all kinds of affection. He appeared to be peaceful as he rested on top of her and she didn't want to disturb him, but her hand was starting to hurt. The moment she withdrew from him, his eyes popped open and he glared at her.

"Why'd you stop?"

"Because my hand was hurting."

He scooted up closer to her neck so that he nuzzled the side of it. "But I was enjoying it!"

"And my wrist was starting to hurt." She lightly pushed his head away from her.

"But it's still not fair," he whined.

"Soul you can be such a baby sometimes."

"Mmm, so can you," he said as he snuggled against her chest and gently kissed the soft skin there.

Silently chuckling to herself, Maka shook her head at the man. "I love you."

"Love you too," he said as he looked back up at her.

Soul moved up to gently press their lips together while Maka wrapped her arms around his neck. Their lovemaking this time around was slow and lazy, barely moving against each other and only creating a little friction. However, it still felt great. Her heart burst at the feeling of being so close to him, feeling his smooth movements on top of her body. His teeth lightly sunk into the skin on her neck as she let out a small moan, and her orgasm came strong after the long build up. As she clenched around him, she felt Soul come to his own release has his member quivered within her.

They laid in bed peacefully, enjoying the others company and completely in ecstasy as they relished in the fact that they were both alive. The time they had shared together - from their year at the academy to now - had truly been an adventure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to thank my betas for helping me edit this thing. Y'all have been such a great help throughout these last few months. A special thank you to Professor Maka, lucyrne, and howlingmoonrise who spent the final day editing some of the chapters. It was greatly appreciated and helped me out more than y'all will ever now! Also, thank you to Eis who helped push me along in writing this thing when I wanted to quit, for being a fan of it before even reading it, and for being a super supportive friend!! I really did appreciate it, thank you. For those that I had talked to in chatzy, thank you for being supportive and being there for me during my freakouts. I really did appreciate it, even if I didn't seem like I did. Y'all were amazing to have during the beginning of this. I would also like to thank my artists for choosing my fic to work with this resbang. I really do appreciate it because I genuinely believed no one was going to choose my fic due to the immense warnings!! Lastly, I would like to thank the mods for putting this event on. Y'all are wonderful people for doing this and I appreciate all of y'all's hardwork.


	11. Epilogue

Medusa walked down the golden steps, a pink haired human cyborg cowering behind her as they went. Things hadn't gone as she had planned during the battle a few days ago. She had wanted the shadow figures to murder and defeat the Spartoi members who had come to help out, including the other villagers. However, that didn't happen. She needed to find another way to take down Lord Death and his people so she could release her real prize that was hidden underneath Shibusen.

She was going to put the world into madness and darkness if it was the last thing she did.

Taking the last step, she walked toward the waters edge and looked down. It was dark and murky, hiding the beast that rested underneath. She had spent months,  _years_ creating the beast, and now it was finally time for it to see the light of day.

"Ragnorak, it's time."

She dipped her hand into the water, and watched as the ripples flowed into the middle to create a large whirlpool. She heard Crona crying in fear behind her, and rolled her eyes. A small part of her regretted using her own child to experiment with robotics, but it was a very small part that was practically obsolete with the rest of her. The whirlpool separated, creating an opening in the water, and Medusa smiled in glee. She stood up, and walked away from the pool of water.

"Stop your crying and come along, Crona. We have work to do."

As they walked up the steps, the ruins started to tremble. Debris fell from the ceiling, hitting the ground with a loud crack. Medusa and Crona walked out of the small chamber as the entire ceiling caved in, but kept walking until they were outside of the ruins. Medusa paused suddenly, causing Crona to bump into her. She glared at the child who looked away sheepishly, and waited for her monster to escape its prison. There was a loud crack that reverberated throughout the vacant desert followed by a loud screech.

Medusa smiled as the earth below her feet shook and trembled. Her monster was alive, and no one would ever see it coming.


End file.
